Still wetting the bed at 7

[knee_deep_with_1]

My daughter is 7 and is still nowhere close to being dry at night. I am SOO tired of having to buy pull ups that dont even work. I have been trying many different brands/styles of pull on trainers and stuffing them with toddler pre-folds but I cant seem to find one that helps with the leaks. She isnt a heavy wetter at all, she just wets more then once a night and by the morning, her bed, sheets, pillow, comforter are all SOAKED. I have limited drinks, made her go (well try to go) before bed because she ALWAYS never has to go, waken her up at night (which I cant do anymore) now that she is in school and it affects her school work...you name it, I have tried it. The problem is that she isnt motivated to want to try to help herself stop. How can I help her stop if she wont put forth the effort? I am SOO tired of having to wash bedding every morning and deal with the smell...thank god for febreeze but that still doesnt completely remove the pee smell. Is there anything out there thats not a trainer or pull up that will work for an older child? I am getting desperate here and I need to find something. Thanks everyone.

Mary

[waiting2bemommy]

I didn't want you to see all those views and no replies...I'm sorry that my oldest is 3 so i don't really know what would work for a 7 year old. Have you tried not putting anything on her at all? Would she wake up, or notice at all, if there was no pull up?

Also, I use cloth diapers (which I realize wouldn't work for a 7 year old) but I was going to say that I get the pee smell out with baking soda and vinegar added to the wash. my ds wets the bed pretty frequently and I do this with his sheets as well. I noticed a decrease in bed wetting once i ditched the pull ups (at about 2 yrs 3 months) but he still wets the bed about 3-4 times a week. However if he pees in the night and wakes up we just throw a towel over it and take his pants off and he goes back to bed. no way am I changing sheets at 2 AM unless it involves vomit.

[meemee]

Originally Posted by knee_deep_with_1

The problem is that she isnt motivated to want to try to help herself stop.

See mama how conditioned we are. you think its her thing.

when it may not be so.

one of the things least commonly known is that many children wet their bed till their early teens like myself.

there is a hormone that needs to develop to help the children feel the urge. those who dont have it yet continue wetting.

parents who go to the doctor and come home with medicine usually comes home with a form of this hormone which is artificially taken to feel the urge and thus stay dry.

i will let other moms fill you in with what you can do to stay dry.

other moms have had successes cutting out dairy.

others use a kinda alarm that is attached to the underwear.

[LynnS6]

Our son wore Goodnights until he was 8 1/2. He simply wasn't ready until then. Our dd was out of nighttime diapers at 2 1/2. Her body was ready.

Several questions to consider:
1. Are you using the products intended for older children who wet the bed? Pull-ups aren't intended for overnight. Goodnights and whatever the Pampers version are. Know too that you may need to go a size up. If she's big enough for the minimize size on the next larger version, try that.

If you'd rather do cloth or if the Goodnights don't work, I know that there are cloth versions (Drymids is one company that I remember from my research, but I never bought from them.) You can get a waterproof cover to put over them. I suspect you can find someone on Etsy to make them if you'd like.

2. Are there any bedwetters in your family or her dad's family? There is some bedwetting on both sides of our family, and so i wasn't surprised that it took ds longer. My niece wet the bed until her teens. It took her that long. Alarms didn't work, other things didn't work. Time did.

3. Some parents put multiple layers of sheets down -- so waterproof mat, sheet, waterproof mat, sheet -- that way if there's an issue in the middle of the night, you can just strip down to the next layer.

[mama_y_sol]

My dh was 8 or 9 when he stopped wetting the bed at night. He is a VERY deep sleeper and just wouldn't wake up. Nothing worked for him. They tried everything they could think of. It pains my heart just thinking about him as a child dealing with this. But he grew out of it. His mom just trudged on, changing the sheets, dealing with a wet mattress, wet clothes for years. They took him to doctors, tried different things. Like I said, nothing worked. Just time.

Best of luck to you mama.

[Red Willow]

I agree with PPs. Don't worry about it. It's hormonal and she will grow out of it. Maybe you could try Depends or another adult diaper, might have better absorbency.

[choli]

Originally Posted by knee_deep_with_1

The problem is that she isnt motivated to want to try to help herself stop. How can I help her stop if she wont put forth the effort?

As a child who wet the bed until my teens, I sincerely hope you are not actually saying this to your DD. I can assure you that it bothers her a lot more than it bothers you.

[alison77]

my 7 yo ds still wets. we use underjams and find that they are very absorbent at the level that an older child needs. good luck!

[treeoflife3]

Originally Posted by choli

As a child who wet the bed until my teens, I sincerely hope you are not actually saying this to your DD. I can assure you that it bothers her a lot more than it bothers you.

This.

My mom used to tell me that I probably do it on purpose... I'm just too LAZY to go to the bathroom so instead I just use the pull ups.

No, I was not too lazy and YES it DID BOTHER ME that I wet the bed. as far as i knew, no one else I went to school with wet the bed and I was horribly embarrassed, even at seven. I wet the bed til I was 11.

It is true, the best thing you can do is ride it out. I was on medication for awhile (the hormone a pp mentioned) because I didn't produce it AND I slept too soundly (I never remembered being woken up to go to the bathroom) so it just wasn't going to work well.

and you know what, I've wet the bed a couple times as an adult. It sucks but what can I do? I'm asleep when it happens.

put a waterproof pad on her mattress and teach her how to change her own sheets and wash them. let her know you still love her and you understand that it is hard to do something you want to do when you aren't even conscious for it. at seven, she is able to at least change her sheets. I had my own in my bedroom so I'd change them without mom even knowing. Otherwise, all you can do is wait for her body to be ready to respond to waking up or to produce the hormone to keep her bladder full til morning.

[ArtsyHeartsy]

Hi, we have had this problem forever it seems, I feel for you! My dss still wets the bed at almost 12. I have posted on this a few times but this post helped me some. What we do right now is wake both dd(6) and dss (11) before we go to bed and restrict liquids, to a certain extent. Sometimes it works sometimes it doesn't. We had them both in night "pull-ups" for a long time and thought trying without would help, not so much. My dd was dry for almost two weeks and sort of went back to her wetting. So, I'm not sure if it's slightly psychological for her but my dss has no control whatsoever and will go more than once a night...and doesn't wake when he wets. I have read that at puberty it will stop, but I've also read that puberty has no bearing. We don't really push the kids to be dry, we try to be supportive but sort of encourage the want to be dry. Both remove their sheets and pads and dss even does the laundry himself.

I wish I had answers for you. I just posted in the cloth section about finding something re-usable as it seems we aren't going to be rid of this problem for a long time. Anyway, I was looking for a reusable absorbent panty like training pants you wash. Or a way to make some sort of insert. This is for my dd, not my dss unless he wants them. It seems silly to go back to pull-ups especially since our baby is in cloth. I did find some underwear on http://www.bedwettingstore.com that are washable and reusable in larger sizes.

My dss is going to camp in a week and we finally broke down and got him a prescription to get him through the week so he doesn't have to worry about pull-ups. (his doc also checked him for infections etc) We haven't tried it yet, will try it tonight. His doctor recommended the alarm. We are looking into it now (again), she says it's helped all of her patients that have tried and the reviews on the store are quite good.

Good luck, I would recommend the double sheeting method if you have the energy! I feel like washing sheets is a never ending job and my dss's sheets smell SOOO strong I gag if I have to wash them.

It's frustrating for us and for the kids.

[DaughterOfKali]

My 7 yr old still wets at night. I've given up on the anxiety and just have him wear GoodNites. (he has sensory issues and hates to wear cloth dipes now.)

[mamazee]

It's not that uncommon for people to not be able to stay dry until puberty. It's completely out of people's control when their bladders are under their control during sleep. So try to be gentle with her and see this is a laundry problem rather than a behavior issue.

There are some cloth diapers for larger kids that might work for you. Otherwise, there are GoodNights pull ups in that age.

[phathui5]

Have you tried eliminating dairy? I would cut it out of her diet completely for at least 2-3 a month. Milk, cheese, butter, and anything with dairy on the label.

[littlehoneybee]

I know exactly what you are going through. DS is five and had never had a dry night in his life up until a few months ago when I bought a pee alarm. Prior to that, he was wearing Pull Ups or Goodnights, but he would still soak the bed sometimes twice a night.

When we put them alarm on him, I discovered that he was peeing four and five times a night. He is such a deep sleeper that he often wouldn't even know the bed was soaked until morning when he woke up.

The first week with the alarm was hell. I was up every hour or two helping DS to the bathroom because he just didn't wake up fully when the alarm went off. The second week went much better and he went from fully wetting to just wetting a little and being able to finish in the toilet. After two months he was staying dry With the start of school, he started wetting again, but it's nothing like before; usually just once a night and just a little. He is able to finish in the toilet. Right now, he has about 50% dry nights. His doctor and I agree that he's just going to have to outgrow it before he stays completely dry.

In the meantime, here's what we do; limit fluids right before bed, ds wears regular underwear with the alarm attached and then Pull Ups over the underwear. I bought waterproof pads that go OVER the sheets that he sleeps on. Underneath the sheets, there is another waterproof pad to protect the mattress. The over the sheet pad is so nice because if the Pull Ups do leak, we only have to change the pad in the middle of the night.

Hope this helps!

[Youngfrankenstein]

[QUOTE=meemee;15929596]See mama how conditioned we are. you think its her thing.

when it may not be so.

one of the things least commonly known is that many children wet their bed till their early teens like myself.

there is a hormone that needs to develop to help the children feel the urge. those who dont have it yet continue wetting.

p[/QUOTE

Yeah, my almost 10 year old boy is "dry" 80% of the time. I do have him very involved in making sure the strip the bed in the morning and re-make it that night. We took away the pull-ups about 5 months ago when he admitted to going in them just as he woke up.

But him still continuing to be wet a few times has shown me it's not in his control...and I know it will be.

I have also read that some stop closer to puberty.

Don't fret!

[PreggieUBA2C]

There is primary and secondary enuresis: primary means the child doesn't develop the ability to hold urine (usually day and night); and secondary is when the child develops the ability to hold it and then loses it later on (usually only at night), usually around age four.

There are people on both sides of my family and my dp's who've had secondary enuresis until about age 12, so we're prepared for that reality and it doesn't bother us. It seems from observing my children, that whatever signals them to hold their pee or would alert them to wake up to empty their bladders is either missing or in conflict with their sleep cycle. It may be that when they are in the deep part of their sleep (which is always when they pee), that hormonal cascade is ineffective, or because they are in a deep sleep, they don't produce it at all because of some other physiological issue. In any case, it is perfectly obvious that it's not their intention to pee while sleeping.

I have two boys who have secondary enuresis. One is seven and the other four. We put an extra night-time pull-up in the bathroom with a thick bath towel and a change of pj pants so that they can deal with it if their pull-ups leaks. We also have them sleeping on woolen mattresses and with wool blankets. It has been completely effective at not soaking and what ends up on the top of the mattress is easily sopped up with the towel. There is no smell, and the wool top cover and blanket can be washed and hung outside to freshen when needed, although it's been many months since it has been needed.

If I had cotton sheets and a regular mattress, I'd do the layers. Actually, I did that, but like others, the urine smell in the sheets was frustrating, especially because I couldn't do laundry every day, so they sat steeping in it until laundry days.

Anyway, the wool has been the solution for our boys. I can put my nose right up to it and not smell anything, even though a lot of pee has been sopped up over months, and I have a very acute sense of smell.

[MJB]

My 7.5 yr. old wet the bed until a few months ago. We used a toddler prefold wrapped around a microfiber towel in an XL Bummis cover.
He still doesn't hold his pee all night, he just wakes up now (and goes to the toilet).
We also had a plastic cover on the mattress which is a must for the smell.
My 4.5 yr. old has occasionally wet the bed but has been out of night-time diapers since 2.

[mizliz72]

My SD, who turns 7 in a couple months, still wets sometimes. We waited until she was dry for a week or so before stopping with the pull-ups (she's super-skinny and there were no night-time things that were small enough). I'm not sure when, but she seemed to regress so we've had to deal with some wet mornings now and again. She is like her dad and sleeps like the dead, so I guess she just doesn't always wake up to go (though she does some times), plus he wet the bed until he was like 11 and I know it can be biological in families. He wakes her and makes her go before we go to bed, around 11 or 12 at night. Occasionally she is a bit wet in the morning. Hopefully it will get better as she gets older. We've probably been dealing with this about 1 1/2 years since going off pull-ups. She simply wasn't dry till after age 5. If we didn't get her up every night now, who knows what we'd be dealing with. We have a plastic liner under her sheet, plus we have her sleep on hospital pads that have the plastic bottom. Problem is she moves around all night (I have some funny photos I've taken of her strange positions - and I can use a flash and not wake her), and one morning the sheet was soaked in a big spot near the edge, so wet that the plastic liner under was really wet, and because it was the edge, it had all run down her mattress to the box spring and bed frame. It was unreal! It must have happened just before time to get up. I guess I'm glad I'm not the only one dealing with it. My mom said my sisters and I never had a problem after being potty trained, so I have to go by what other people on sites have told me.

In addition to the nighttime wetting, I think SD waits too long to go even during the day. She has in the past had a few daytime accidents when she didn't want to stop playing, and a few times when I took her to go potty somewhere her undies already had a wet spot. I dont' know if she even realized what having to go feels like until she really can't wait anymore. We also have issues with her not wiping after peeing. I've caught her not pulling up her underwear and pants and not having wiped several times. We finally told her not to flush here so we can check on her. I have no idea if she's wiping at school, but I bet sometimes she doesn't.

[griffin2004]

My friend's son is 11 and does not stay dry at night. His ped says it's a pituitary issue in this case.

Have you talked to her ped?

[HappyTomato]

We may be in the minority but the bed wetting issue for us in the end was something my 6 (now 7) yr old could control but he was seeking attention. It didn't start out that way and I truly believe he fell in the category of he just wasn't ready at first. I then noticed on more than one occasion when he would spend the night over at his grandparents, he would come back and his bedwetting wouldn't be a problem for several weeks. Then it would start all over again and stop when he'd visit his grandparents, etc. We stopped pull ups at night a long time ago so we dealt with wet sheets constantly. I finally told him that I was going to buy pull ups for him if this didn't stop. It stopped, just like that. I think it had to do with him being an only child for most of his life then all the sudden I had two babies back to back in 2 years. I think he was feeling a little left out like alot of older siblings do. So I'm trying harder to make sure he's not feeling that way anymore. HTH