I absolutely agree that having a baby is a ton of work. But, I'm once again a little puzzled by the emphasis on support for those who aren't traumatized. Those of us who are emotionally devastated, depressed, traumatized, etc. still have all that work...and we're also struggling with an emotional load that can negatively impact every aspect of our lives with our new babies. I can guarantee that if that load weren't there, I wouldn't have needed anywhere near as much support as I did.
Maybe we're just using the terms differently, I don't know. But, honestly, to me saying that women who aren't traumatized need "just as much" support as women who are traumatized is inherently dismissive of the trauma. "Sure - you need support, because you were traumatized, but women who weren't traumatized need just as much" doesn't quite...gel...for me.
One of my frustrations with my c-section is that I feel like there was an attitude by my HCP that "oh, she's healing up nicely, everything must be fine, no need to go overboard on support." Well, first--this assumption that I was "healing up nicely" was based on a really narrow concept of who I am and what "healing" is. I'm more than just a few flaps of skin that are sewn together. And "health" means more to me than being able to fart and walk.
But OK, even if I was "healing up nicely" according to these narrow standards, it would have been nice to get more support. Like, a phone call from someone 2 weeks after the birth to see if I was still doing well. Like at least the appearance of noticing and caring that my right foot never woke up from the epidural (yeah, that took about 4 months).
I don't really mean that someone who had a glowing, feel-good, bounce-out-of-bed birthing joy ride necessarily needs the same level of support and care as someone who's just been through hell. It's more that "doing well" by someone's standard shouldn't be used an excuse for withdrawing or ignoring further support/care. If a mom needs support, she needs support. She shouldn't have a "prove" a certain level of trauma in order to get it.