Originally Posted by MommaMoo
My mother died when I was 12, and some of her family members (including her parents) behaved in obnoxious and strange ways, as well. Being young, I didn't have to directly deal with it, but now as an adult I still don't understand why they acted that way. Well, truthfully, some people just suck, and the people who were jerks about my mother's death were jerks in their regular lives as well. (Not saying your family members are being that way, but mine certainly were.)
It was my grandmother that passed when I was 12, but THIS is what happened here, too. Some people were just... off... in the way they handled things. I recall being particularly disturbed by an older family member screaming out of the blue, wailing, tearing at her hair and throwing herself on the ground. Yet my grandmother's death was expected. A little later I realized this hysterical woman was stumbling drunk - she'd come to view my grandmother's body in that condition.
There were several other family members who were drunk at the funeral, and a few oddballs who were behaving in completely inappropriate ways while sober
I know none of this is what's happening to you, but I suppose I'm just trying to illustrate that extreme situations often bring out extreme behavior. And sometimes, it just serves to accentuate already extreme mannerisms in the people we have to deal with. I am so very sorry you have lost your brother, and I think you are behaving normally and processing this unexpected loss the best way you can FOR YOU
. Be angry, cry, walk, pray, whatever you must, but most of all, be gentle to yourself. You've been through a lot.