I don't know exactly what I'm looking for, advice or opinions?
I know at the end of the day, I have to make my own decisions, but I wondered if anyone here had faced a similar circumstance?
I have lost 3 babies (2 first tri, and 1 early second tri). I have no LC.
At this stage, we are looking into the possibility of trying a final time.
I have a congenital uterine abnormality. In simple terms boils down to basically being half a uterus.
If (heaven forbid) I can maintain a successful pregnancy, the chances that I will end up with a preemie/nicu baby are very high.
I anticipate that it will not be an easy pregnancy by any terms, and my doctors understand this also, and I will be managed by a neonatologist from the word go. I'm willing to do whatever is necessary, bed rest, etc to be successful.
I've suffered a lot of guilt over my miscarriages, knowing that each of them were perfectly healthy and growing bubs, and my body was the cause of their deaths. I worry alot about the preemie issue, and the guilt that I would feel over that. I hate to think that my body could be the cause of pain to my child.
We really want children. Really. I cannot imagine my life without a child. But is it irresponsible of me to go ahead with a pregnancy? Do mamas of preemies think that wannabe mamas like me should get over themselves?
And if I was successful, but did have a preemie... would others think it was my fault?