Homebirthing your first - Page 2

[Eresh]

I gave birth to both of my boys at home and I would say that it being a new and unfamiliar experience is even more reason to choose homebirth for your first. The level of care and connection prenatally with a midwife is completely different than with an OB (with my first I began with OB care and transferred to a practice of MWs at 30 weeks). And while I've never had a hospital birth to compare it to, I can't see how a hospital can approach the level of care and support you get in your own home with a good midwife.

I would suggest that you hire a labor doula if you're able to financially. There's an attitude out there that doulas aren't necessary if you're birthing at home, but honestly you're still going through labor and having someone there who's experience with birth who's only job is ensuring your comfort is still a good idea, imho.

Regarding "negative" birth stories -- there is a perception that if you just do X, Y, and Z, you will have a beautiful, short, pain-free homebirth. Sometimes that just isn't in the cards ... and I don't mean anything horrible happening, I just mean that it can hurt. A lot. And it can seem like it's going on forever. And it's not because of anything you did or didn't do. But you are strong and can make it through with the proper support. I think you're much more likely to have that kind of support at a homebirth.

[macandcheese]

Originally Posted by lunarlady

I birthed my first at home, and had zero prior expose to HB or actually childbirth of any kind. I always sort of thought of myself as being like a baby bird -- time to fly, never done it before, but getting pushed out of the nest no matter what. What made me feel better was constant daily exposure to positive birth stories, from books, my natural childbirth class, YouTube videos, and websites. I avoided negative, and focused on the positive. It was still a humbling and unpredictable experience, but also a powerful and positive one. Good luck!

I'm also planning to HB my first in January, and I am not nervous or scared about the birth at all. I think what has helped the most as far as keeping a positive outlook is to read looooooots of birth stories focused on home birth or natural births.

The only place I differ from lunarlady is that I read them all—positive and negative outcomes. I'm totally a logical/analytical thinker and for me, it helps to gather as much information as possible about every potential scenario. The negative/sad birth stories are hard to read, but I feel like they're helping me to learn what some trouble signs might be, what situations to discuss with my MW beforehand, etc. If those stories will make you more nervous, though, then stay the heck away!

Ina May's guide to childbirth has a great collection of positive birth stories (even though they tend to be a little hippie-dippy, imo) that do a great job of showing a range of birth situations with positive outcomes. I've also heard really good things about using Hypnobabies to learn how acknowledge and minimize fears.

[Virginia884]

Thank you, ladies, for all your feedback and advice. I am 100% sold to the idea of homebirth, and know I can do it, have known since I was a kid (sister was born at home), but sometimes those unknown things get in my head!

I love the idea of writing affirmations and and focussing daily. I am doing a lot to prep and feel very equipped and supported. Thanks again and here's to happy, educated birthing for all of us!

[Angelorum]

I homebirthed my first. I was surprisingly pretty zen the whole pregnancy about the upcoming birth. I did have a few niggling doubts though as to what exactly I was getting myself into. I had read a ton of birth stories of all types, and felt well educated as to what the process involved and various deviations from normal, but I never took a formal birth class teaching any one method of how to cope, and that caused me to think that I must be totally naive and woefully unprepared sometimes. In the end though, it all went great. Before the birth I had decided that I was probably going get to the point where I thought I couldn't take it anymore, but that it would be ok, and pain alone wouldn't kill me. My birth was not painless, and it was hard, but I never did get to that point. I am so glad that the memories of my first labor and birth are so overwhelmingly positive, I think it would be a lot harder going into a homebirth after having a tough hospital one.