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Having a hard time..

post #1 of 2
Thread Starter 
warning: big whiny thread.

I am not doing good. I am 21 weeks, my pregnancy is going well..I feel okay, other than only sleeping literally 4 hours a night.I dont like sleeping in the day, I have so much to do so I only try to sleep at night. So I am constantly tired.I am gaining wayyyyyyyy to much weight in my opinion, dr says its great but I feel and look gigantic. I am depressed about my weight. Dh just started a new job and he is gone 10 hours a day, we need the money but I am all alone. He is also dealing with the public and works with males(in sales) and he tells me that they are married and talk about women customers all day long how hot someone is etc, which makes me feel GREAT, even though dh is not participating I guess he is at least noticing them. I feel like sh$t at home, growing huge, no ankles and he is all dressed up gone all day long. I am super hormonal right now and told dh i wanted him to leave me and find someone else who looks better than me.This of course is ridiculous but I just feel like curling in a bed and staying away from everything until I can get skinny again. I am not not happy. Then I am having a hard time thinking of the twins and how am I going to cope and I will be isolated and stuck inside with babies and never get to have a life again. No work for me, no school, nothing. Im just on a pity potty. My boobs are up from C cups to DDs......they are disgusting and huge. I hurt all the time from round ligament. I am ashamed of my body and I hate everything right now. Thanks for letting me vent!
post #2 of 2
Hugs, mama...feel free to vent as much as you want! I for one am right there with you...it can't always be easy, right? Its especially hard when you don't have as much support as you feel you need...my DP works insane amounts of hours too (he's a paramedic) and is also in school, so I basically NEVER see him. Couple hours at a time, maybe two days a week if I'm lucky. That's not going to change at least until he's done with school in June. Add to that the fact that we got kicked out of our rental house with almost no warning so are staying with my parents until we close on our new house (which will most likely be after babies are here), my 3yr old DD is acting out horribly from all the stress and upheaval of the last few months, my XH is doing his best to make my life miserable and a super crappy pregnancy (GD, back on insulin, on BP meds as of today, etc, etc), and believe me, I TOTALLY get it! I can't even focus too much on what life is going to be like once babies get here, because I think if I did that right now I'd lose my mind.

Just know that we are all here for you, to listen and offer whatever support we can. You WILL make it through this!
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