anyone hs several children? extended family calling, now a big distraction? - Page 2

[allmine]

Originally Posted by MyFullHouse

What I'd be more concerned about is the idea that you don't have 30 minutes to spare in your day. Whether you're taking family phone calls or not, you NEED to find at least 30 minutes in a 24 hour day to claim as your own! How long do you really think you can keep going without that tiny sliver of time for yourself?

I do have 30 minutes, and possibly even more, to claim as my own everyday. I just am realizing that *I* deserve better than to spend it regularly to listen to people dump on me about their lives.

I'd rather spend my precious, small bit of free time some other way than letting it get eaten up by phone calls that drive me nuts.

I think you're just echoing what I am already saying.

[MyFullHouse]

Originally Posted by allmine

I do have 30 minutes, and possibly even more, to claim as my own everyday. I just am realizing that *I* deserve better than to spend it regularly to listen to people dump on me about their lives.

I'd rather spend my precious, small bit of free time some other way than letting it get eaten up by phone calls that drive me nuts.

I think you're just echoing what I am already saying.

Sorry about that! It read differently in my head!

[allmine]

Originally Posted by MyFullHouse

Sorry about that! It read differently in my head!

Hey, no problem! I think it was good for me to read your response and get that last umph of validation I needed to claim my free time as my own for my own good and health!

[kikidee]

Just going to echo what a lot of others have said -- don't answer during school time and realize that your life is crazy-hectic right now and you have to take care of YOU and your KIDS.

I don't know your whole situation, but someone else mentioned that you might have a hard time saying "no" to family. I used to be that way - I would never ever choose to not take a call from them, because I would feel guilty about that. I felt like I had to always be emotionally available to them, and to do otherwise was mean. Not so!! Through a long and painful situation with them (story for another day), I realized that I CAN be my own person and still give them a healthy amount of love and attention.

There are times that my brother calls (he calls everyone when he is driving to and from work) or my sister-in-law calls, and I will be busy with the kids or doing school, etc. and I don't answer. And you know what? It's OK. People understand that having kids is huge and that we don't always have time to sit and chat.

I do try to find time somewhere in the day(s) after the missed call to call and chat, but that doesn't always happen.

Hang in there- and I have to say I'm glad I'm not the only one who can't juggle the phone calls and kids at the same time! It's like, when I am on the phone DD starts doing every single thing she knows she is not supposed to! I just got tired of trying to juggle and shush her (like you said, not fair to her!) and it would exhaust me and make me feel pulled in a zillion directions.

Anyway - long post to basically say what others did. Hang in there!! Enjoy your down time.

[prairiebird]

This is a timely post. I have the same issue, though I don't know if some of these techniques would work. My dad and my aunt are both around 70 and call me nearly every day. My dad calls me daily to tell me about whatever Rachael Ray had on her show that day. If I don't answer, he'll call back about 5 times and call my cell phone thinking I'm dead or something. I've told him over and over that sometimes I'm just very busy, but it's just one of those things.


I was thinking I might try building in a break time mid-morning where I just let the kids chill for a while so I can return calls, and then set my microwave timer for a certain amount of time.

I'm in that boat where I don't really want to have to break my momentum to talk on the phone, but when dealing these particular relatives, they would go to extremes if they couldn't talk to me. (and tell me about Rachael Ray. Over and OVer. No offense to anyone who does like her, but I believe my dad's dedication has soured me!)

Same issue with me about not using the internet. My aunt won't even leave messages because they scare her. She'll just repeatedly call until she's bored.

[allmine]

Originally Posted by prairiebird

This is a timely post. I have the same issue, though I don't know if some of these techniques would work. My dad and my aunt are both around 70 and call me nearly every day. My dad calls me daily to tell me about whatever Rachael Ray had on her show that day. If I don't answer, he'll call back about 5 times and call my cell phone thinking I'm dead or something. I've told him over and over that sometimes I'm just very busy, but it's just one of those things.


I was thinking I might try building in a break time mid-morning where I just let the kids chill for a while so I can return calls, and then set my microwave timer for a certain amount of time.

I'm in that boat where I don't really want to have to break my momentum to talk on the phone, but when dealing these particular relatives, they would go to extremes if they couldn't talk to me. (and tell me about Rachael Ray. Over and OVer. No offense to anyone who does like her, but I believe my dad's dedication has soured me!)

Same issue with me about not using the internet. My aunt won't even leave messages because they scare her. She'll just repeatedly call until she's bored.

hey, I feel ya on this, I really do. My mom is almost 70 and if I don't return her calls within a certain time period she becomes convinced that something terrible has happened. And she doesn't do rachael ray but buddy she tells me the next real life episode of this or that eldery relative that is now trying THIS drug for her alzheimers instead of the last one...e.tc etc....don't get me wrong.. I DO CARE. It's just that I can't keep it up anymore

[Arduinna]

HSing or not, if you don't have the time right then, don't answer the phone or just tell them you have to go once you find out they are just calling to vent or chit chat.