Tips on managing TV time for two little ones?

[Katielady]

I try to limit my kids' media exposure, as I'm sure most of us do. My kids are 4 and nearly 2. For a while when DD was a baby/smaller toddler and too little to care much about TV, I used a media chart for DS. He had tokens representing one half hour TV show and two half-hour computer times. We moved over the summer and haven't really set up a computer area that's safe for him yet, but I was already unhappy with the way that was going anyway. He started out playing starfall etc., but once he really learned how to use the mouse and to type a little, he started choosing his own web sites and basically finding sites like PBS that contained short videos, and computer time turned into more TV time (but shorter attention span, yay. )

Anyway, with that system he was allowed to choose when to use his tokens, and I liked that it took the pressure off of our relationship- he wasn't asking me all day long about when he could watch TV, and once he'd used his tokens, the chart said he was done, not me. But he tended to use all three in a row first thing in the morning. I found it yucky for him to be watching TV the instant he woke up, and I lamented not having the option at the end of the day when I was making dinner and really needed the easy break that TV provides.

So we don't have the chart anymore, and it's just freeform again- but now my DD has opinions about what SHE'D like to watch. If I put on a show that DS chooses, she freaks, and vice versa. She entertains herself pretty well though; it's still DS who bugs me constantly on days like today when we are home a lot and I have housework to do. I started slipping into the bad habit of letting them watch hours at a time, I'm embarassed to say. So today I resolved to try a new system- two shows a day, starting at 4:30, and I pick them. (So I can pick ones I know they both like.) DS totally flipped when I told him about it at lunch. Then I got really frustrated and yelled a little. I've done so much to encourage independent play in our new house, I set up these great stations all over the house with different activities, but if I'm not actively playing with him he just defaults to begging for TV. It really frustrates me.

I'm hoping the 4:30 plan will work. He responds well to schedules and routine. And that way there's no debate, negotiation, etc.

Those of you who are not TV free, how do you handle it, especially with more than one small child in the home?

Thanks!

[LuckyMommaToo]

My kids each get to pick one show a day. We alternate who gets first (even days are DS, odds are DD). They are not allowed to watch TV in the morning (they're older and go to school, though). So it's usually around 4 in the afternoon when they watch.

It took me a couple years to get here. Hope you can find a solution that works.
-e

[pianojazzgirl]

We too, in trying to accommodate both kids (and in letting the "easy" factor take over), had recently slipped into hours a day of screen time. Yikes! What's worked for us, that I never thought I'd be able to do, was to go cold turkey no-screen. So far so great. The kids have rediscovered their creative, imaginative play and no longer even think about the screen. I used to think I *needed* to have the tv or computer on for them so that I could cook dinner, clean up, or whatever. I'm amazed that it actually hasn't been a problem at all. They've just gotten way more into playing with their toys or doing crafts. Anyway, it's only been 2 weeks so it's early days yet. And at some point I will add back in some *very limited* screen time and will be watching this thread for ideas of systems to help regulate it. My thinking is that we needed to kind of detox after getting a little too heavy with the screen time, with the hope that we might have more success in a month or two with instituting a very limited viewing schedule.

ETA (a day later, lol). Sorry, I know you were not looking for "no tv" advice. I should have written my paragraph from end to beginning. What I meant to write is that we've fallen in the trap of waaaay too much tv (which it sounds like you feel you've done too), and so, by way of cutting it down to a reasonable amount (maybe half hour daily, maybe not even daily if I can get away with it), we've started by having a month or however long it takes of no-screen time to totally get out of the tv mode and for the kids to re-learn how to entertain themselves sans tv. (not sure if that was clear from my original post!)

I also wanted to mention that another thing that has really helped us go no-tv (and would also help with limiting tv) is to put the tv away (for us we tuck it around the corner just out of the living room where it used to live) and to put a cloth over it. Apparently out of sight out of mind really does work!

[Cujobunny]

We have a PVR (DVR I think it's called in the U.S) so I record shows that both kids like (my kids are 5 and 3). They each get one choice and we usually alternate who gets the first pick. If one doesn't want to watch the other kid's choice they can do something else. That never happens Occasionally ds will want to watch a bigger kid show (he has a Spiderman dvd for example) and we have a tv with dvd player, no cable, in our guest bedroom so he watches in there, but usually they watch their 2 shows together.

Usually they watch their 2 shows in the late afternoon while I make dinner (ds goes to school in the afternoons). There are days they don't watch any shows and days they watch an extra show or 2 in the mornings. If time permits only one show then they have to agree on it or they don't get to watch.

Our tv is in the basement so it's not always there in their sight. Our living room on the main floor is more like a playroom- a couple of armchairs and the rest is toy shelf, puzzle/block shelf, play kitchen, music area, stuff like that.

[Thyme Mama]

i don't know if our situation would be helpful to you, but maybe you'll find something of use in our method.

we live in the mountains and therefore would have to pay for satellite to watch "tv". we hate commercials and most tv so it's a no-brainer for us to not have "tv".

that said, we have new large-ish flat screen tv because we do like to watch a lot of nature and documentaries. we own many, many dvds. ranging from mostly nature shows, music, documentaries and kids cartoon movies to a handful of comedy/drama/fantasy grown-up movies. we also have streaming netflix.

last winter was a hard one for us: i had hg for the first 24 weeks of my pregnancy, and it was unusually cold here. i'm ashamed to say, the older kids spent much of the day with dvds on as background noise.

fast forward to now: we limit tv-time to friday night is family movie night. i make pizza and popcorn and we watch either a family friendly new-release, a new-to-the-kids movie or something we haven't watched in a while. every other day, we tend to save the tv for when the kids go to bed. and not even every day. dh and i will watch a documentary or nature/history show for a little while. i usually knit or sew while listening, and dh will do origami or something he finds relaxing.

if the kids have been having a good day, or they can't go outside or we are sick, the tv becomes something special. we'll watch a kid oriented nature show and then maybe a couple episodes of spongebob or a disney movie. this keeps the tv off and tv as a treat. no tv while eating. i tend to have music playing most of the day when i'm indoors doing housework. dancing music like the dead, or bela fleck, neil young and jazz.

we feel that the tv has the potential to be a great learning tool. as i speak, it's very cold and rainy here, the kids just finished cleaning their room, and had some grapes. i put on an animal passport and the kids are talking about the animals. when it's over i'll ask them to draw the most interesting animal they learned about and we'll talk about what we watched.

also, when the tv is on "for the kids" dh or i still "watch" with them and talk about what we're seeing/learning about.