Pregnant in Clarksville, TN. Birth options? - Page 3

[HRJ]

Also I am finding that, in some ways, I have more apprehension going into my second birth than w/ my first.  with the first, it was just all unknown and there was some fear w/ that and could I really do it.  But now having done it (which I did not have an epidural and overall it was a good experience), but my son had the cord wrapped around his neck with some brief distress (heart rate went down to 40) and I had a 3rd degree tear.  So those two things almost make me a little more nervous this second time around.  And I must say i am really glad to have a doula to help me.  And she really, really wants me to deal wtih any fear I have now, so I am not bringing it to the birth and can really let go.

[Beauchamp]

Originally Posted by HRJ 

i think the point is that you shouldn't have control during labor.  The more in control you are, the more tensed you are which perpetuates a fear-tension-pain cycle.  The more relaxed and uninhibited you are, the less pain.  You need to let the labor take over and let go of it.  My doula was telling me that it makes her nervous how much i am reading.  I would really recommend Mind Over Labor by Carl Jones though - great guided imagery.  And I found some cheaper hypnobirthing type tapes on amazon that I got.  I'm also listening to another guided imagery CD.  The Bradley Book by McCutcheson really explains the tension-pain cycle and really taking one contraction at a time - no more than that.

I know. I get it. I do. But for some reason, although it makes perfect sense to me, and I tried to relax during my first labor, my brain just went somewhere else, away from the logic I was telling myself. I don't really relax on a normal day, so in labor...LOL. Maybe I have a bad attitude   I don't know. I'm just...difficult to convince. Difficult to convince my brain to actually think this stuff. I KNOW in my heart what you're saying. I just can't seem to execute it when the time comes. In most things I usually do have control, so that must be my roadblock. 

Can I just mention (not being snarky, but kind of laughing about it) that I, too, have been reading a ton, and it's funny that you say your doula is nervous about how much you're reading...and then you recommend a book.      What I've been telling myself is that my labor will go *my* way, not an Ina-May-birth-story way. And if it doesn't live up to how wonderful those all sound, it's just fine. This time around I am trying to have no expectations of what THIS labor will be like. Reading birth stories does help me to get ideas on things to do in labor. But the first time I think they set up some expectations that, when not met, discouraged/scared me a lot.

I also read the Bradley/McCutcheon book the first time. Loved it! And yet...my brain "went there" imagining hours and hours of pain, and how many more, etc. I need to learn to shut that off. I need to stop thinking about how bad it can be! 

I recently told my MW that basically I am a pain in the butt and if she decided she didn't like me or want to deal with me anymore she should just tell me. She just kind of laughed and said we'd be fine, and then said many women feel this way but they are not as vocal about it as me.  

I'm SO torn about where to birth. (Farm, Vanderbilt, or Home.)  I posted a separate thread about it in B&B. My DD (who will be 2yo for the birth) is a key factor for me that I can't let go. 

[Beauchamp]

So...Gateway Medical Center in Clarksville. Can anyone tell me about it, the good the bad and the ugly?

I'm tossing and turning over home birth, and Gateway would be my transfer location. Is it awful there?

[raspberry]

Hi! I have not birthed at gateway, but if you are still looking for a doula, I know one who is very familiar with gateway. Even if you are not looking to hire her, I'm sure she would have some information for you. 

http://laboroflovedoulaservice.weebly.com

[Beauchamp]

Thanks! I have contacted her.

Right now I think we're going with the Vandy MWs. I'm just not sure I'm up for the potential of transferring again from a home birth. Too much risk, in that sense, for my psyche.

I'm not sure how I feel about it all. We'll see in June, I guess.

[HRJ]

Just wanted to say that we had baby #2 w/ a doula.  I've had 2 hospital births - one w/ and one w/out.  The doula made a huge difference.  She did accupressure to speed up my labor.  And during transition she had me in the shower on a birth ball . She did hip squeezes (was really feeling the contractions in my lower back and rectum) while my hubby sprayed warm water on my abdomen.  Made a HUGE difference, and my hubby and I said 'how did we do this by ourselves with #1?" 

[Beauchamp]

Thanks! I've contacted a doula! This will be a huge load off my mind if she is available. I totally needed a doula the first time around and didn't have one.

[JeIB]

Hi, I am also in Clarksville and looking for birthing options. I was just curious if you did decide on the Vandy Midwives and how your experience was? How was the drive there once you were in labor and how was the longish drive home when you probably were just ready to be HOME! Any advice would be much appreciated!

[Beauchamp]

Originally Posted by JeIB 

Hi, I am also in Clarksville and looking for birthing options. I was just curious if you did decide on the Vandy Midwives and how your experience was? How was the drive there once you were in labor and how was the longish drive home when you probably were just ready to be HOME! Any advice would be much appreciated!

Well, I was there for only a short time. My labor very suddenly accelerated and we hurried up and got in the car. I was FINE at home and then all of a sudden...WHAM. I was biting a pillow and almost screaming during contractions (I guess I have hard labors ) Anyway...DH went anywhere from 70-90mph based on whether I was screaming in the back seat or not. In between contractions I was chugging my RRL tea infusion.

They made me sit in triage for 20 minutes and that part was awful (because I was hollering for 'help'...what kind of help, I don't know, lol) They said I was 4cm. I walked to a delivery room and squatted in the (dry) shower, yanked on the handrail, bit my hand...moved to the bed and had a bit of nitrous (very helpful teeny tiny intervention that I wish I could've not opted for, but I was in a LOT of pain and quite scared. My doula hadn't arrived yet...) So, we were in triage at 1:15-1:30 or so...baby was out in 2-3 pushes at 2:58. So...I don't recall very much because my birth felt like a freight train to me (DD was 21 hours of labor, 2 hrs 15 min of pushing....so VERY different.)

All in all, we were treated with much respect and they are very low intervention. They really do try to help you have a NCB if that's what you want. I'd go there again if I ever had the chance. The option for nitrous...you can't get that anywhere else.

I was nervous about the drive home but my little guy slept the whole way, and we ate takeout sandwiches.

p.s. if you need a doula, which I'd personally recommend, IMO due to the hospital setting, which was a little uncomfortable for me based off my first birth which was a bad experience.....please contact Heidi Rau Duncan. She's great! She will meet with you for no cost so you can meet her and talk, see if you like her style, etc. My labor went so fast that I was already getting nitrous when she arrived (and thus over the very scary/painful/hard part...but overall she was great for us.

Feel free to ask more questions or PM me. Sorry if I sound all over the place but I'm trying to get DS to sleep right now.

[JeIB]

Thank you for the response and the advice! I know you're busy busy!! I will definitely contact Heidi to see if she's a good fit. It's hard being in a new place where you don't have any friends or family to ask for their opinions. Our first appointment is tomorrow with a regular OB near Gateway. We'll see how it goes! BTW, I am here in Clarksville, over off of Dover Road, if you ever have any questions or anything. Thanks again!

[Beauchamp]

You're welcome! Look up Clarksville Birth Pros on Facebook, too. Lots of doula info there as well. Midwives, too, I think. The Vandy MWs have their own FB page. Not trying to be negative or scare you, but I've heard so many bad things about Gateway in terms of not being very natural birth friendly. I hope you have a good experience with your OB.