Home birth with asthma - how to convince my team?

[Mommel]

Okay, so I am 37 (due 6/22/10) and this is my first pregnancy.

I desperately want a home water birth and have begun interviewing midwives. I live in Oregon, so we have a lot of options and even some great cost effective helps, including the OHP open card, which covers much of the costs involved... how cool is that? Very.

The issue is that DH and my mother are both very concerned about the fact that I have chronic asthma, which is often irritated by anxiety and stress, as well as aerobic exercise. So, how do I convince them that a home birth is the right choice? We just got our BFP on Wednesday, so I know I have time to make my case, but DH is REALLY freaking out and is terrified I'm going to die and leave him all alone with our child. (And of course, when I heard that, I giggled and made it worse... ) I think my Mom has the same fear. My sister tried a home birth VBAC and ended up going in for a c-sec anyway, but that's her, not me... and any midwife I choose will affiliate with a hospital and we will be living mere blocks from one just in case we need one.

Help convincing them? Anyone else have asthma that has done this before?

Thanks,
Raqui

[Juvysen]

I would start interviewing midwives and see what they have to say about it. They may be able to put your Dh's and your Mother's fears to rest (or they may tell you you're too high risk? I don't know much about asthma and pregnancy). Anyway, I'd say you'd have more information about it once you start talking to midwives about how they can support you through your labor at home.

[rhiOrion]

Are you prone to sudden SEVERE asthma attacks? If not, I'd say that you'll know if you're having trouble and if abuterol/xopenex doesn't help. Then you'll know it's time to go to the hospital. Midwives carry o2, right?

My asthma was actually much better while I was pregnant, though the opposite is true for some.

Do you have a peak flow meter? I'd plan to check it every so often so you can tell if your lung capacity decreases (more than would be expected with your lungs being squished up).

My asthma was definitely no problem while I was in labor, even with pushing for 2 hours.

[turnquia]

You could meet with a midwife to discuss things and let your husband and mother also ask questions as well.

However your DH has legitimate concerns to be worried. You do have a real medical condition which may or may not be made worse with pregnancy. I think you really need to acknowledge his fears as they are still real. And then deal with his concerns. Without that your just blowing off his fears and that could create issues or resentment later on, especially if you homebirth and there are complications.

Congrats on your pregnancy.. happy healthy 9 months!

[forest~mama]

Do you take preventative meds or just rescue meds? What part of Oregon? I am an athmatic who takes daily prevantative meds. I went through one pregnancy/homebirth just fine, and I have very similar triggers to you. Seems like I have read that like 1/3 of athmatics get better with pregnancy, 1/3 stay the same, and 1/3 get worse. I can't for the life of me remember where I read that because I was last pg about 5years ago!
I agree with others that a midwife will be able to talk with you about this, and may be able to allegiate your husband's anxiety.

[MamaMonica]

Moved to homebirth

[Mommel]

Are you prone to sudden SEVERE asthma attacks?

Nope, not at all. I can usually tell when I've got one coming on and I peak flow regularly, so I keep an eye on it.

I think you really need to acknowledge his fears as they are still real. And then deal with his concerns. Without that your just blowing off his fears and that could create issues or resentment later on, especially if you homebirth and there are complications.

Good point. Thank you.

Do you take preventative meds or just rescue meds? What part of Oregon?

I take preventative meds daily and I live in Portland.

Thanks to all for the ideas and suggestions. I have a midwife appointment next week and will talk to her and see what she says. I will try to remain open to the idea that I may not be able to do this the way I want to as well.

Raqui

[Lady Lilya]

I'm getting the feeling that your DH's fears aren't exactly rational and won't go away if a MW says asthma isn't a problem. If he is that terrified of you dying, then probably he is uncomfortable with you homebirthing, and the asthma is just an excuse.

[Juvysen]

That's a good point ^

It's helpful to have the midwife go over all the life-saving stuff she'll have with her in her kit. It helped my Dh feel more comfortable with it, for sure.

[Kitten]

I have asthma for which I take a daily preventive inhaler and I carry a rescue inhaler. I am having my second homebirth in the spring. It has never been a concern or even been brought up by a midwife (i did disclose the asthma and the meds I take.) it was never a concern for my hospital birth either.

if you have an attack during pregnancy that you can't get under control, you'll go to the ER. That will be true whether you have a homebirth or hospital birth. That would be true if you weren't pregnant either.

pregnant women with asthma aren't required to live at the hospital as soon as they get the positive test. Lol

FWIW if my husband said something so ridiculous to me I'd laugh at him too. Sounds like he is just being an anxious first-time father.

[MrsJewelsRae]

I have severe asthma as well. Everyone is different and had different triggers, but I will share my experience. My first 2 pregnancies my asthma was absolutely horrible, I was in and out of the hospital for severe attacks- the problem was I kept getting sick and that is when I am at my worst. I had pneumonia at least twice with both pgs, and even a collapsed lung in each pg. I used my at home machine a lot. So long as I did not catch a cold I was fine, I used my meds for normal exercise induced wheezing, etc. It really improved as the pg's progressed and I can honestly say that during labor my asthma was seriously not even a thought in my mind. I did not need my inhalor at all, did not experience any wheezing or shortness of breath in the slightest. All 3 of mine were totally uncomplicated deliveries, unmed vaginal births. My first was 16 hrs labor, unmed hospital birth, 2nd was a 5 hr homebirth with midwives, 3rd was planned homebirth turned hospital birth with midwives (transferred for high b/p just a few hours before labor began on it's own)- longest I pushed was 15 minutes for my first, no trouble in that department either (7 lbs, 8.5 lbs, 8.10 lbs respectively, FWIW). With my 3rd my doctor switched me to Flovent and it controlled my asthma much better, plus I luckily caught fewer colds and the only snag I ran into was getting bronchitis at 34 weeks, which was quickly taken care of with my meds and some antibiotics, nothing severe like I experienced with my first 2 kids.

I think so long as you have the proper meds and you are not going into labor ill or are prone to sudden severe asthma attacks w/ unknown triggers, things should be fine. Be very careful not to expose yourself to your triggers, especially as your edd approaches. For me that means absolutely NEVER being exposed to 2nd hand smoke, or staying in a house with an old wet basement or damp musty carpets, a house with indoor pets, and taking good care of myself. If you find yourself in stressful situations, do your best to relax, learn to not engage if it is a person causing you stress, walk away and put yourself and your baby first.

Take care and I hope you have a wonderful pg and home birth!!

[Mommel]

I'm getting the feeling that your DH's fears aren't exactly rational and won't go away if a MW says asthma isn't a problem. If he is that terrified of you dying, then probably he is uncomfortable with you homebirthing, and the asthma is just an excuse.

Sounds like he is just being an anxious first-time father.

Yep. I'm pretty sure that's it. Now that I've done some education for him about the benefits of home birth (and detriments of hospital birth) and we've actually discussed the financial end of things (turns out he was worried that the midwife would cost more than the doc - not true!!), he's feeling much better.

My mother is still not confident that it will be successful, given our family history, but she's willing to give it a shot with me as long as she can be assured that the midwife team will be there to support us. DH feels much better about it now that he knows my mom will be with us. He practically begged me to make her promise to be here. LOL

As for the asthma, I think it will be okay, although what MrsJewelsRae mentioned worries me because I rarely get through a winter without antibiotics and of course I want to avoid it. It's good to know though that everything turned out fine in the end. Thank you! I have already begun to be extra careful by drinking extra fluids and eating as healthy as I can to encourage my natural immune defenses, as well as frequent hand washing. I'll keep you ladies posted.

Thank you all so much for your helpful insights and encouragement. My new midwife has already been wonderful via telephone and email and we haven't even had our first visit yet!! <3<3<3

~Raqui