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Does any body out there actually have this????

post #1 of 60
Thread Starter 
The Best Friend

Let me describe....

You know each other very well. You talk to each other 3 or more times a week. Sometimes you talk about the deepest parts of you. Other times you just laugh and chit chat about the day. You know she is there for you. If you called at 2 a.m. she'd be concerned and available. If she called you at 2 a.m. you would be concerned and available to her. You are as eager to hear about her life, her joys, and her struggles as you are to tell her about yours. When something happens to you, good or bad, you can't wait to tell her all about it.

So....anyone got one????
post #2 of 60
I only feel that comfortable with Dh. I do have some good friends, but we have kind of grown apart. I would love to make a friend who I feel comfortable around and parents similarly to me.
post #3 of 60
Absolutely! Met her at a LLL meeting ten years ago when my dd2 and her dd1 were babies. We talk, text and/or email daily. Definitely "there for you at 2:00 a.m." friends.
post #4 of 60
Yes we have been friends for 17 years. We've shared everything in our lives with one another even when I was moving all over the country. I've even been present at two of her births. We have been to hell and back and are still there for each other.
post #5 of 60
Thread Starter 
Okay so here is my deal...

I have a handful of really wonderful, super close, long distance, friends. I love them and they are important to me. However, nobody is ever available to talk. I am a lonely SAHM. They all have jobs and other things going on. We talk more like a couple times a month than a week. This is great but I want more.

AND I know it exists because I used to have it. That friend and I became disconnected after the birth of my son for reasons that she would admit are her fault. I don't want to make this post about that. We recently reconnected and she was very insistent on wanting to get back to the way it used to be. I became SO happy because I thought that I had The Best Friend again. However, it is very apparent that her life is very full and she is dutifully trying to add me in but not easily. She often says she wil call but does not. When we do get a chance to talk she is always the one who wants to go first. She is never available when I call even though she works part time. She is often having "me time" and she has a wild social schedule (single). I just don't really fit. I am mourning this friendship once again.

I love my dh and he is my best friend. He is one person and a man and I know I need my friends as well. I am very blessed to have the amazing friends I have. I just wished I could have at least one person who WOULD ANSWER THE PHONE!

Thanks for listening
post #6 of 60
Thread Starter 
Kirsten and Hey Mama,

I am SOOOOOOOOO jealous!

But I am so happy to know that it exists and I am happy for the women who have it.

I was thinking people were going to say I was nuts for longing for some utopian ideal.
post #7 of 60
yes!

i'd be tempted to say i have two friends like that, but with one, we don't talk as often as we used to. i know we can still count on each other for those 2am calls, though!



christina
post #8 of 60
Do sisters count? I have three sisters and we have this kind of relationship. I talk to all three of them almost daily (yes, I'm on the phone a lot) sometimes just chatting, sometimes talking about problems and issues, sometimes just calling to tell a funny story, etc. I've never had a non-sister best friend, but then again, I've always had my sisters so I've never felt much of a need.
post #9 of 60
Quote:
Originally Posted by berry987 View Post
Do sisters count? I have three sisters and we have this kind of relationship. I talk to all three of them almost daily (yes, I'm on the phone a lot) sometimes just chatting, sometimes talking about problems and issues, sometimes just calling to tell a funny story, etc. I've never had a non-sister best friend, but then again, I've always had my sisters so I've never felt much of a need.


I think sisters count more! How amazing to have three best friends that are also your sisters! That's really special!
post #10 of 60
COunt me in for yes, I do! Of course, dh is my best friend, but I have a sister, who is like that for me, my cousin and I are best friends too. I also have a friend like that too. So 3 people at least. I am blessed.
post #11 of 60
I feel very lucky because I have several, including my mom! I am so blessed to be a part of a community of women who are stay at home moms and have similar parenting strategies and their kids are friends of my kids. We def. talk several times a week, with some multiple times a day, and not only on the phone, but in person too (one is my neighbour).
However, I wouldn't call or expect any calls at 2 am unless it was an emergency
post #12 of 60
I have two friends, one lifelong, one of 20 years, who fit most of that. With kids & marriage(me) and very demanding careers and absorbing relationships (them), plus an hour + physical distance, we don't usually talk multiple times a week- we might facebook, text, email that much but there are times a couple weeks go by without a peep. But I could definitely call at 2 am if there were good reason and have fielded lots of those from one of them (the other isn't apt to be awake at that time let alone having drama).

but yeah. they're my bffs.
post #13 of 60
nope.. as a matter of fact I'm turning my cell phone to by the minute because literally no one calls me unless it's a dr. appt reminder.

utterly sick of people saying you are just like my sister or daughter and then NEVER call so i doubt that constitutes since I know they spend tons of time with their real sisters. Or I hate it when my aunt says you HAVE family! Uh I guess if you mean family being someone you see once in 10 years and have never called you in your life.. sure I have EXTENDED family but no one I really consider "family".
post #14 of 60
I have this, but mine is a he. But we do go through periods where we don't always have the time to talk a lot or can't seem to catch one another on the phone (email and FB help though). We live far apart right now, and we're both busy with career, family, school, relationships, etc. In a couple of years, DH and I are hoping to move where my best friend lives though, and I can't wait!
post #15 of 60
yes, for the last 30 years although we don't necessarily talk 3+ times a week because well we are both pretty boring and we no longer live in the same state.
post #16 of 60
I have 3 older sisters with whom I could have this relationship with- but never had a girlfriend in my life that I could be like that.
post #17 of 60
my sister (though we don't talk more than once a week or a little less, but we're working on it). but being there for each other when we need it absolutely.
DP of course.

I'd love to have a few of best friends like that, I hope I will someday. I'm just starting to make friends again.
post #18 of 60
I do, except we don't talk that often any more. We both have busy lives. But when we do manage to connect on the phone, the chat easily lasts an hour, if the baby allows. But we used to be roommates, and would sit on eachother's beds gabbing into the wee hours instead of sleeping.

But she's absolutely there for the 2 am phone calls. This is the woman who during my loss, went to work for her 8 hours, drove the hour to the hospital, picked us up dinner, spent the entire evening with us, left somewhere around 2 am, drove the hour home so she could be at work at 8. She did that 3 days in a row while I was in the hospital. She drove down here once a week after work to do my grocery shopping and cook us dinner for 6 months after that.

And when DS was born, she gave up her days off to come down and help us out during my really long labor, just so DH could take a nap. She snuck out when I hit transition and missed the birth by 90 minutes.

I'd walk through fire for her, she's definitely done it for me.
post #19 of 60
i had this at different times of my life. for lots of reasons, i don't have it now. i miss it a lot.
it is hard to find that person, but definatly worth it.
i still have a friend who i see once every few years, and talk to once a year. we actually have kids the smae age, but she is the breadwinner in her family and has a large and varied social life, so, we rarely see each other. just different stuff going on in our lives. but i know i can depend on her for anything.
i think it is really hard to maintain a friendship with someone who is in a totally different path as you.
post #20 of 60
I would say I have two friends like this. We grew up as little kids together. Friend A moved away 22 years ago, but we stay in touch and chat regularly, and she comes to visit family here. Friend B moved away 15 years ago but we still stay in touch and visit etc. I have know Friend A for 32 years and Friend B for 31 years.

We know pretty much everything about each other.
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