June pregnancy after loss (PAL) mamas - Page 3

[BHappy]

mamas,

i'm looking for some input.

i have my first mw appt this wednesday (i am 9weeks2days). the practice routinely schedules a sonogram for the first appointment. i'm assuming that's for dating purposes. i really do not want to have unnecessary sonograms. i know the exact date of conception, so i don't feel i need the sono for that reason.

in spring 2009, i miscarried a baby. it was a missed miscarriage. i started spotting during my 12th week and through a sonogram discovered the baby had died. having gone through that loss, would you choose to have a sonogram now, just to check that all is well?

how are you mamas handling early sonograms? is it worth doing for peace of mind? a part of me is really scared to have a sonogram -- what if it shows nothing again? that fear is not in the forefront of my mind, but i feel it lurking sometimes. most of the time i feel confident and connected with my baby. i just can't imagine it happening the same way twice.


xo

[la mamita]

i had an early ultrasound (today, actually) at almost 7 weeks. i know the exact date i ovulated, but since this is a PAL, i wanted reassurance. i wanted to see the heartbeat, especially because i really want to tell people close to me--i'm going through a lot of fatigue and nausea and that's causing anxiety for me--but i didn't want to tell people without getting a little more confirmation that everything was going smoothly. last time, i had an UP until i miscarried at 9 weeks, so i never had any sort of indication how things were going...

for me, the added risk was worth being able to feel comfortable getting more support by telling more people. i feel like, even though there's still a risk of miscarriage, it's definitely lessened--i don't know if there was even a baby last time or if it was just a yolk sac...

i will be using a midwife and having a homebirth. i think the 20 week ultrasound is optional, not required, so this might be my only ultrasound.

i think you should definitely go with your gut on this one.

[seafox]

I agree with la mamita, go with your gut. I actually had the opposite reaction than I expected - I had a missed m/c too, found out at the 12wk u/s (the first one I get) and the next pregnancy they offered me an early one (7-8wks) to check on things. But, I opted out - even though the peace of mind might have been helpful - they estimated that my missed m/c had been the babe passing at around 7.5/8wks, and so I didn't think it would give me THAT much peace of mind - I might see a h/b one day but then lose it the next. I also have a very tipped uterus so I was afraid they might have trouble seeing anything that early anyway.

and a weirdly big reason was that getting the bad news at the u/s sucked, and I just didn't want to get bad news, um, 'vaginally' - that just seemed awkward, honestly!

so I just waited again until 12wks. And I am also doing that this time.

[OrangeMoon]

I thought I remembered a study that said (I think specified early) first trimester ultrasounds double your risk of first trimester miscarriage. I can ask who I think told me about the study if anyone is interested.

[la mamita]

OrangeMoon: yeah, can you post that? i would be interested to see how they handled the fact that many people getting early ultrasounds either 1. have some reason to worry that something is wrong (spotting, cramping, clots, etc) or 2. have a history of loss and need the early reassurance. both of these groups seem to be at a higher risk for miscarriage in the first place...that seems like it might confound the results--but they might have accounted for that somehow.

in other news, i ended up telling my parents about the pregnancy out of sheer desperation: i need some medications shipped from the US to help deal with the nausea as they aren't available here in peru. i phrased it as "i really did not want to share this with you yet, as it is so early, but...".

when i go online today, i find out that my parents told a bunch of my relatives as well and i'm starting to get 'congratulations' messages on facebook. i am totally NOT ready to be public about this pregnancy, not with people like my extended family or acquaintences on facebook...i haven't even made it past 9 weeks, which was when i lost the last baby two months ago! i had told them to not tell anyone, but the cat is totally out of the bag--my family is really gossipy.

i was furious, bawling, horribly angry...and embarrassed because with my first kid, i was a young mother (19) and there is a lot of shame around that. i'm older now and this pregnancy was very much planned and wanted, but still unemployed and looking for a permanent place to live and definitely not "stable". i feel confident that i'll pull it all together in the next few months, i have a graduate degree in a good profession--but i am not ready to answer questions to my friends/family about my plans for the future, my job situation, my money, etc...brings up wayyy too many bad memories of my first pregnancy, during which i was very depressed.

ok, vent over. the combination of all these feelings: the loss, the memories of my last pregnancy, the sense that i have to be public with this when i am not ready to do that...it's been overwhelming today.

[OrangeMoon]

Okay, here's one for starters, and a very good one at that. I'll look for more later.

http://www.midwiferytoday.com/articles/ultrasound.asp

Okay, just found another.

http://www.greenhealthwatch.com/news...ound-hurt.html

And here's a mothering one!

http://www.mothering.com/pregnancy-b...out-ultrasound

[OrangeMoon]

http://www.naturalnews.com/028853_ultrasound_fetus.html

http://www.ehow.com/about_5767461_da...-doppler_.html

[BHappy]

Hi mamas,

La mamita, I hope you are feeling better today.

Thanks for your thoughts on early ultrasound. Orange moon, I have to read the articles you posted.

I had my first appointment today and I decided to not have the ultrasound.

Even though it's pretty early, midwife listened for the heartbeat just for fun. She found it!

I am so so happy to have heard it. Makes me realize that I have been kind of holding my breath in some sense and hoping all is well. Ahhhhhhhh so wonderful!

xo

[la mamita]

yeah, none of those articles seem convincing (and eHow is not a reliable source), i just read through all of them--they don't provide enough evidence about the scientific data used to judge, control groups, etc...i need to read abstracts at least to make a decision as to whether early ultrasounds cause miscarriage.... and there were only a few studies cited about increased miscarriage risk and those were regarding 1. repeated ultrasound exposure (weekly ultrasounds) and 2. second trimester ultrasounds, not first trimester. if there's anything that says that non-repeated, early ultrasound has been shown to increase miscarriage rates, please share it, cause it's not in any of those articles...

Bhappy--so exciting!!! that is great news.

[seafox]

I have to say, the naturalnews article is terrible! what an odd way to write a news article - "And yet conceited yuppie parents just can't get enough of it! They want to SEE a picture of their little baby before it's even born, so they subject it to tissue damage and ultrasound trauma in order to get a snapshot they can show off to their yuppie friends."

jeesh! some aren't caring about pictures but are wanting peace of mind, for pete's sake. No reason to be insulting.

and comparing u/s used to kill sperm and u/s to see a baby is apples and oranges, that's like saying you should never take tylenol, since in a huge amount it can kill you.

It is interesting that some claim that the machines have varying output power - but that also could be a red herring - I'd have to see how regulations on the manufacturing is done. Some machines can be 'rated' for higher power but still always output the same amount. I would imagine that in order to get an image correctly, that most u/s would have to use a very similar power - a higher or lower one would impede the resolution. So I'm not sure why they would say there could be a huge variation? I know 3D though is probably much higher.

I try to keep my u/s to a minimum (I wanted 2 last pregnancy, but ended up w/ 4, due to appendicitis at 20 weeks, and going late) but no 3D ones. It would be interesting to see if there were any really good peer-reviewed articles on the subject that are a bit more scientific in their analysis.

[OrangeMoon]

Haven't found the one I was originally referring to yet, still looking. Searching for studies while being preggo with a toddler isn't always the easiest thing to do.

[seafox]

oh no problem Ill do some searching too. I did do some research when pregnant w/ Z, and I did decide doing an early u/s (though I think it was more for the reason I didn't want bad news 'vaginally') but maybe it was also due to something I read. One article did mention its a more direct u/s (not as much barrier) which certainly could make a difference if you do think its potentially dangerous.

I want the NT scan, so I am willing I guess to get the 12 wk. And the u/s during my appendicitis saved Z and I's life, so I guess I have no problem with that if it happens! at least I certainly won't get appendicits this time

I even had an MRI w/ Z (also for the appendicitis) which is even less researched than u/s when it comes to effects. I supposedly took a 'safe' magnetic fluid to 'light up' my intestines, which also is not very researched and they aren't sure it crosses the placenta.

So I guess w/ Z I was pretty scared how that would all affect him even more than the u/s. And he's fine, thank goodness

[OrangeMoon]

I totally hear what you're saying. I mean, 99% of pregnant women in the U.S. get ultrasounds, and we're all mostly fine, lol. I got a bunch of ultrasounds with G in the first 20 weeks. I think 4 or 5, one at 20 weeks was vaginal and sucked so bad it was the proverbial last straw before I switched to a midwife. Last ultrasound too. I even had that shitty stomach monitor thing and G freaked out so bad the whole time, hours we're talking, it was also what made me say, that's the last one unless something big happens that makes all of this actually necessary. Like appendicitis, lol. Anyway, G is is fine, I more blather about sometimes just to spread the word for people who may not be aware, like how I wasn't, that there is another side to the "ultrasounds 24/7 are perfectly safe" story. I don't judge anyone at all who thinks things through a gets one or two or a few. I more just want to spread the word of there are things to check out and then make a decision vs. just listen to what all the OB's say without looking into other things as well. Because if I knew then what I know now I don't think I would have gotten any of those ultrasounds, and regret that I did because there were no reasons for them. It's a great tool when there is a real need, I just think routine, for no reason ones there could possibly be more risks than benefits and it's why I won't get any more unless there's a reason. Surgeries are so common too, I'm sure Z is rockin :-) Maybe one could use the same analogy of surgeries are great when needed, but routine surgeries for no reason can have more risks than benefits ... or something, lol.

Originally Posted by seafox

oh no problem Ill do some searching too. I did do some research when pregnant w/ Z, and I did decide doing an early u/s (though I think it was more for the reason I didn't want bad news 'vaginally') but maybe it was also due to something I read. One article did mention its a more direct u/s (not as much barrier) which certainly could make a difference if you do think its potentially dangerous.

I want the NT scan, so I am willing I guess to get the 12 wk. And the u/s during my appendicitis saved Z and I's life, so I guess I have no problem with that if it happens! at least I certainly won't get appendicits this time

I even had an MRI w/ Z (also for the appendicitis) which is even less researched than u/s when it comes to effects. I supposedly took a 'safe' magnetic fluid to 'light up' my intestines, which also is not very researched and they aren't sure it crosses the placenta.

So I guess w/ Z I was pretty scared how that would all affect him even more than the u/s. And he's fine, thank goodness

[malibusunny]

I guess this is technically me.  I had a miscarriage at 7 or 8 weeks a few years ago.  I think I've been more cautious about telling people because of it, but I'm not really more worried than I was my first (completed) pregnancy. 

[rach03]

I'm cautiously peeking in here...I had two miscarriages late in the 1st trimester between my two kiddos.  I had my daughter in August of 2008, and now I just found out I'm about 7.5 weeks pregnant.  I was shocked, and didn't find out until a week ago.  I should be on progesterone as soon as I get a positive, so I was freaked out.  Started last week and my levels were low, 11.5.  I had an ultrasound monday morning that showed a 7 week 3 day baby with a beating heart!  I have another ultrasound in 3 weeks to make sure everything is okay becuase 10 weeks is around the time my losses happened.   Hopefully I will be sticking around here!

Does anyone know what happened to the main PAL forum?  I don't see it in the new format!

[rach03]

Nevermind, I must be crazy because I see it now.  I swear it wasn't there when I first logged in!

[lokidoki]

Hi gals! I am officially subbing to this list ~ I have been nervous to do so up until today (kind of lurking until now). My EDD is June 29, 2011 ~ this pregnancy comes after a 6w6d m/c in September (never got AF before getting pregnant again). I had an early u/s on Monday and the HB was 110 and I was measuring 5w6d even though they have me listed as 6w5d at that point (now 7w1d). My doctor and the ultrasound tech did not seem alarmed so I am trying not to be (although that is tough after a m/c). So far I have lots of symptoms and am very hopeful. We have told family now and told our DS who is 4 1/2 years old. Still having a hard time with it "feeling real" but hopefully that will come. Ironic that when I was pregnant with DS I never even thought about it when they would tell me he was measuring a little small! Oh to have the innocence back I have lost after the m/c!

At any rate ~ just wanted to pop in and say hello. Trying hard to keep my chin up and cling to hope!

[la mamita]

welcome lokidoki! were you charting, do you know when you ovulated? i got pregnant the cycle after a m/c, no AF in between, and i had a later than usual ovulation. perhaps that is why you are measuring smaller than usual? 

[bk_hope_2_b_mama]

Hi. I feel confident enough today to call myself pregnant, so I will join you. Had a 7w6d u/s today - measured 8w exactly with a heart rate of 160. The is the first time I've ever felt like it might really be happening!

Trying not to find new things to worry about...

[lokidoki]

Originally Posted by la mamita 

welcome lokidoki! were you charting, do you know when you ovulated? i got pregnant the cycle after a m/c, no AF in between, and i had a later than usual ovulation. perhaps that is why you are measuring smaller than usual? 

I was kind of charting. I do not take temps but I was observing fluids, etc. ~ and per the EWCM disappearance on CD 18-19 I think that is likely when I ovulated although I do not know exactly when. I had EWCM for about 9 days...a lot for me...and we DTD several times during that time period. Ovulation at that point probably would put me several days behind, right? Because the "first day of your last period" figures on ovulation on day 14-16 right?