Looking for advice please!
We have an eight month old and a 4yo. They adore each other- so much so that the 4yo (who sleeps in his own bed) comes racing in every morning so happy to see her (co-sleeping with us) and generally wakes her up. He can tell time so we told him we would love to have him come into the room and be quiet and calm AFTER 7am. So now he is waking up at 5 or 5:30 and playing quietly in his room with the light on so that he doesn't miss 7 rolling around on his clock. Problem is, our baby frequently isn't awake at 7 but he comes in a starts breathing loudly (I know it is hard not to laugh when I think about it) or says her name quietly until she wakes up. If we ask him to be quiet she wakes up.
So... my guess is that if we change the time he will do the same routine, waking us/the baby up and getting up early to make sure he doesn't miss anything. Also, if he isn't allowed into the room my guess is that he will be actively quiet right outside our room until we wake up and come tell him to be quiet. Power struggle? Need for attention and inclusion? Desire to be recognized for waking up early?
Any ideas? I really struggle to be fair to both kids while recognizing that they have different needs around sleep, attention etc. and it is important to me that our bed be a safe and welcoming place.
I am at a loss and appreciate your help!
We have an eight month old and a 4yo. They adore each other- so much so that the 4yo (who sleeps in his own bed) comes racing in every morning so happy to see her (co-sleeping with us) and generally wakes her up. He can tell time so we told him we would love to have him come into the room and be quiet and calm AFTER 7am. So now he is waking up at 5 or 5:30 and playing quietly in his room with the light on so that he doesn't miss 7 rolling around on his clock. Problem is, our baby frequently isn't awake at 7 but he comes in a starts breathing loudly (I know it is hard not to laugh when I think about it) or says her name quietly until she wakes up. If we ask him to be quiet she wakes up.
So... my guess is that if we change the time he will do the same routine, waking us/the baby up and getting up early to make sure he doesn't miss anything. Also, if he isn't allowed into the room my guess is that he will be actively quiet right outside our room until we wake up and come tell him to be quiet. Power struggle? Need for attention and inclusion? Desire to be recognized for waking up early?
Any ideas? I really struggle to be fair to both kids while recognizing that they have different needs around sleep, attention etc. and it is important to me that our bed be a safe and welcoming place.
I am at a loss and appreciate your help!
