High Needs Baby and Sleep

[chalbond]

help! we've been blessed with a high needs baby. she is now 6 months old and must be nursed to sleep and then bounced (standing up) for a good length of time before laying her down. she never ever falls asleep on her own. i love nursing her to sleep but it is the standing up with a heavy baby that is getting to me. and i must admit i wish she would just fall asleep on her own like "easy babies" do, sometimes. i am feeling very overwhelmed. i have the No Cry Sleep Solution and plan on starting to implement it, but any advice is welcomed.

[her_story]

On a "good night" my baby sleeps 5 hours straight. Usually just 3 hours at a time for the longest stretch each night. Partially in the crib, mostly in our bed. I must say, after 7 months I am exhausted and ready for a change. I read No Cry Sleep Solution when DS was little, but it never seemed to apply to him. I know I am giving him what he needs, and have to remind myself that he is fine, but am anxious to hear what other people have to say.

Anyhoo... chalbond, you are not alone!

[AutumnAir]

What I found worked with my first HN baby who wanted lots of rocking/bouncing too, was to lie down on the bed, place her tummy to tummy on me and then jiggle her up and down on my belly - quite vigorously at first, but as she relaxed I could ease off a bit. Still used to take 30+ mins of this to actually get her to sleep (and that's after the hour long nursing session) but at least I was lying down and not completely doing my back in!

[wombatclay]

welcome to the MDC community! I'm going to move your thread over to the Family Bed/Nighttime Parenting forum so you'll be sure to find the support you need.

[mama2cal&darby]

I'm afraid don't have any great sleep advice. My DS1 was super high needs and woke up 17-20x a night for the first 8 months of his life (every hour after that until he was 2 yo), but he did fall asleep nursing most of the time. Have you tried the Amby Baby, by any chance? It didn't work for us, but I know it has for others.
It may not be helpful now, but I can tell you that my high needs baby is now great 6 yo sleeper.( He is also a lovely little boy.)

[sillysmile]

My 22mo DD still needs rocking or bouncing to get to sleep, so no advice here unfortunately

[graciesmom08]

I do not have a lot of advice, but hoped to offer support as our daughter was/is very high needs. I have to tell you she did not fall asleep unless nursed or bounced-while we stood up near running water!! People thought we were crazy! We would have to come downstairs in the middle of the night to be next to the running water and hold and bounce her there, even then when she was asleep she did not sleep more than 20 minutes unless she was touching one of us!! I completely know what you are going through and it is tough!! However, our daughter is doing great....still high needs, but great! She is very bright, perceptive and affectionate. I do need the reminder to remain patient throughout her "high needs time" as I know she is very perceptive and picks up on if I am gettin frazzled by her! She is now 2 1/2 and we have progressed to the point where she falls asleep in a toddler bed right next to our bed after we read books and lay with her until she is asleep-which now that shes not napping is at the most 10 minutes. She still requires more needs at this stage than other children, but we are willing to provide it to her knowing how it will benefit her in the future!! Good Luck and sleep when she does if you can! Hope this helps!! (Dr. Sears family has also been a great support to parenting her as well, check them out if you havent!)

[sammymama]

Hey there, Just had to chime in to say BTDT and you are not alone! As I type I have 14 mo old DD asleep in her Ergo and I am gently bouncing on the ball. There are very few people I talk to now about her sleep habits as I got SOOO much advice and input when she was younger about how she "should" be sleeping, but I've just come to understand that at this moment in time, she truly cannot put herself to sleep and really does need help. She's now down to 2 naps a day, so it's less time in a sling (I remember getting reaaaaally sore when she was smaller, but sleeping more during the day); we've also just recently transitioned from a ring sling to the Ergo, which is much more comfortable for me to wear for longer periods of time (and is actually easier for nursing to sleep).

So I don't know that I have any amazing advice; I personally have stayed away from sleep plans and such as I believe it would be truly detrimental to my babe to put her through something like that - as it stands now, she is bright, curious, and really thriving. I know she will grow to sleep on her own eventually! That said it does not mean there are not some tough days. But I have schlepped this ball with us everywhere - grandma's, cross country flight, etc. Do what you have to do to meet your baby's needs, mama. Hang in there - it does get better as they get older (even though DD doesn't fall asleep on her own now, she needs *much* less time/help now). When I'm having a hard time I think of a quote I heard somewhere (Dr. Sears maybe?) - will you ever regret having spent "too much" time with your baby while they were small? Probably not...

[cabrandy03]

My 9 month old daugher is defintly a high need baby.  She has to be nursed to sleep and then every few hours all night...she has to sleep next to me for either of us to get any decent sleep.  We've tried the cry it out thing but she is way too stuborn she would literallly cry for hours until I would give up and go get her.  Anyway, I get really frustrated with being so tierd all the time but from what I hear from other moms of high need babies I should just try to stay positive and enjoy my time wiht her while shes so young and attached to me because she will eventually just grow out of it...it's hard somedays....it is so good to be able to comunicate iwht other moms in the same boat.  It really helps me cope to know that I'm not the only one and her behavior isn't my fault.  Unfortunatly my husband isn't very supportive of letting her sleep with us....I think she is just too much for him somedays and blames me for her behavior...he thinks I baby her too much...but I hope he will just hang in there until she gets a little older and more independent.  She's just recently started crawling and already dosn't insist on being held as much as she used to....I hope she just keeps progressing.