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Originally Posted by 4evermom  Ah, but you both have younger kids than your 6/7 yo so you still fit what I was saying. When you have younger kids, 6 and 7 yos seem old because you are comparing them. When the 7 yo is your baby, you might take how he is at face value because you aren't always seeing him next to someone so much younger. You know how it is when you have a baby? The toddler suddenly seems HUGE and many moms have trouble being as patient with the toddler because their expectations have also suddenly changed since they are comparing the toddler to a helpless newborn. And to the toddler, he is just one day older than he was yesterday. So why is everyone being short with him because a baby was born yesterday or he just had a birthday and is magically a whole year older instead of just one day? When you don't have a newborn, that toddler is still pretty much a baby to his mom.  |
But even my 3 year old knows she gets one costume and if she changes her mind after the costume is made/bought, we put it on the idea list for next year (or she can choose something from the dress-up trunk). A 7 year old is perfectly capable of understanding/being taught that mama's time is valuable as well. I mean, I could take what you said and say that people who don't have younger kids are not aware of exactly how mature a 7 year old actually is and how much more refined the reasoning skills are than a toddlers, and thus, they can be treated like the grade schooler they are. Having younger children does not make me any less aware of a 7 year old's capabilities...I've been around 7 year olds a lot. I've worked with them a lot outside of my own children. I know typical and special needs 7 year olds. I know that at some point, you do have to teach them to make a decision, value the time of those who are doing something for you, appreciate what you have, etc. I know that you can't coddle them and put the same expectations on them that you'd have of a 3 or 4 year old or even of a kindergartener.
YES, they need help with developing those skills, but it's perfectly age appropriate to help them understand, by having them take some part in creating the new costume, that there is time and effort and money involved in costume making and that those are finite resources. Would I ask my 3 year old to help make a new costume if she wanted to change her mind? (Well, being Montessori minded, yes, I would. But that's beside the point. I wouldn't *expect* her to be able to understand that at her developmental age). BUT, I would fully expect a 7 year old to be able to sacrifice some time, some money (even a dollar or two), and some effort into helping create the 2nd costume in order to begin to understand that costumes (and toys and food and natural resources, etc.) don't come out of thin air...that our choices have consequences...that the things we consume have availablility limits, etc.
It's not just a costume. The lesson that is learned can be generalized--what if the same 7 year old asked for a DSI for Christmas. Got it, played with it, and then decided that nope, what he really wants is an electric scooter. Does mom have the responsibility to get him a 2nd gift because he changed his mind? Nope. At 7, he can start saving up to contribute to the other item.
That being said, I know Steph, and I'm going to wager a bet that Owen has the mummy costume now.
: I don't know that for certain, but I have a hunch.
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LOL!
We decided that we would look into another costume, but there were no promises 
Later we were at Target and he was looking at the costumes and decided he wanted to be a knight. 
aaaaaaaaaaah soooo typical.
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