That's what my son says about his Dad. My son seems to have found an excuse to let himself self destruct (or just underachieve?)- it's Daddy's fault for leaving us.
My son tells me that he doesn't have to try to do his best under stress because his Dad didn't- his Dad just kicked us out and didn't try to fix things when things got rough.
My son tells me that his childhood has been ruined because of what his Dad did and he has 5 more years to be a child, without any responsibilities, and he plans on taking full advantage of it 'cause you're only a child once, so he doesn't feel he has to really do anything (homework, housework, etc.).
My son tells me that he really doesn't care if he fails in everything- schoolwork, later, real work, etc, in fact, if he ends up living on the street 'cause he can't get his act together, then "maybe Daddy will realize just how much he screwed up everybody's lives by making his selfish decisions, choosing himself over his family".
I'm sure some of this my son is saying partially for shock value, 'cause he doesn't want to do his homework or go to bed at a decent time, but some of what he says, like the third thing, he really means. :-( Should I tell his Dad? His Dad sometimes helps with these things. How should I respond? So far, I've been reminding him of how he felt when his Dad did that to him, and it's not fair for him to do the same to someone else, but he's not that far into it yet- he's still in the "that'll show Daddy" phase.
And yes, my son is in therapy, and yes, he sees his Dad a couple times a month, emails, texts and calls several times a week.
My son tells me that he doesn't have to try to do his best under stress because his Dad didn't- his Dad just kicked us out and didn't try to fix things when things got rough.
My son tells me that his childhood has been ruined because of what his Dad did and he has 5 more years to be a child, without any responsibilities, and he plans on taking full advantage of it 'cause you're only a child once, so he doesn't feel he has to really do anything (homework, housework, etc.).
My son tells me that he really doesn't care if he fails in everything- schoolwork, later, real work, etc, in fact, if he ends up living on the street 'cause he can't get his act together, then "maybe Daddy will realize just how much he screwed up everybody's lives by making his selfish decisions, choosing himself over his family".
I'm sure some of this my son is saying partially for shock value, 'cause he doesn't want to do his homework or go to bed at a decent time, but some of what he says, like the third thing, he really means. :-( Should I tell his Dad? His Dad sometimes helps with these things. How should I respond? So far, I've been reminding him of how he felt when his Dad did that to him, and it's not fair for him to do the same to someone else, but he's not that far into it yet- he's still in the "that'll show Daddy" phase.
And yes, my son is in therapy, and yes, he sees his Dad a couple times a month, emails, texts and calls several times a week.
) and doesn't have any interest in anything right now, including me, including him, including his daughter, his old friends, etc. My son understands this on an intellectual level, but not on an emotional level.
