Help me with toddler/dog problems!

[Dazedstella]

Hi. My 18mo DD is acting out towards my parents small dogs. They are pretty great with her for the most part but I wouldn't trust any dog to sustain against hitting/pushing/yelling especially from a person their own size who is yelling for no reason. I can't seem to work through any method that is remotely effective with her and for some reason this issue seems to really stress me out more than the other toddler behavior going on right now.

Sometimes she plays sweetly with them but other times she will come in the room pushing or hitting them and saying- right in their faces- "no no doggie, no no". Or worse, she does kick them too, only when they are laying down and not paying any attention so I am afraid they might turn around and react out of fear/pain and being caught by surprise.

They, unfortunately, want to be close the family and her all of the time so they don't avoid her, and we are here a LOT so it isn't a small/occasional problem.

I try redirecting her to other things but she gets singleminded about it and keeps coming back, sometimes I find my self yelling about being nice to the dogs, or just trying to remove her from the situation but I guess I need some better tactics!

[Tjej]

My main advice is to separate them until your DD gets a little more self control. The dogs might mope a bit to be in another room, but really it is for their own good and moping is better than having bitten a person and being put down or whatever.

As far as what to do in the situation, when my kids were first learning how to be gentle with dogs (and other small children) I would take their hand and say "gentle" and stroke gently with it (on the dog or child). I would get them to say it too (if they were old enough to say it).

Tjej

[lexapurple]

I am on same page with Tjej,
I have a 3 1/2 y/o DD who grew up with 3 dogs in our household and made her first steps following one of them. She was/is usually good around them but sometimes she would get rough with them and try to get a reaction from them. In those situations she is like you DD "single" minded about it.
when she would get this way dogs were put up to their crates with treats and toys. And I explained to DD that if she wants to play with dogs she needs to be nice to them. It didn't stop bad behavior every time but at least everyone was safe and she had to find something else to do.

[Okapi]

Another vote for finding a way to seperate them. We have an older dog who gets anxious when he's separated from us or feels closed in (even in a normal sized room with the door shut - forget about a crate) and an almost 3yr old who thinks they should be best buddies. The dog is patient, but he clearly disagrees. So we got one of those things that's like a bunch of baby gates put together that can be made into a pen. We have it blocking off a section of the main room. The dog is in the room with us so doesn't get anxious, and DD can't get to him unless one of us is right there with her. She can, however, stand next to it babbling at him for hours and occasionally slipping him leftovers. It's pretty easy to set up & take down, so it's great for a temporary solution. I'm pretty sure we found it a toys r us.
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