Preparing Toddler for Sibling

[hennaLisa]

When would you recommend telling a 2.5 year old about a new sibling on the way? He'll turn 3 just before the new baby arrives. I'm 12 weeks along, and my son is going through a big Mommy-clingy stage right now, which I've been indulging so far.

Things I'm thinking we need to prepare for are:

He sleeps between us at night - usually cuddled up to me with his head on my pillow. He will rarely agree to cuddle Daddy instead of Mommy.

He prefers me to take him to the toilet, especially during the night (he usually wakes up needing to go once during the night)

He nurses before bed and before getting up in the morning. I think I want to tandem nurse - although if my baby #2 is as much of a marathon nursling as #1 was, I'm a little nervous about whether I will be able to do it.

I'm sure there are other things I should be thinking about getting him ready for as well - what are they?

[MamaPhD]

We told DD when we took her to my 12 wk ultrasound (she was around 20 months). She saw the baby on the screen and we told her about it then. Since then she has been kissing my tummy and saying hi to the "small baby". But I really felt like she already knew something was going on because she started acting very clingy from the day I did my pregnancy test! Go figure.

[CinCanada]

I'm thinking of taking my DD 26mos to my MW appt at 13 weeks to hear the hb for the first time too. We haven't told her anything yet either. She went through a really clingy stage for the first maybe 2 mos but she was also teething so it's hard to say if the clinginess had anything to do with the pregnancy. She has developed a kean interest it babies lately though.
My mw was suggesting that I start prepping her even now with age appropriate talk - ie what does DD like to do for fun? what do babies do? What does DD like to eat? Can babies eat that? Nope! - stuff like that. I also found a free online colouring book about home birth that I figure I'll print out a little later on for her.

[english-mummy]

our daughter just turned two and we told her when we reached the 8 weeks mark. I just felt like I was being dishonest with her I guess, telling her that mummy felt sick or exhausted, not explaining why and then she got worried.
When we sat her down for the chat she started talking before us, lifted up my shirt and said "hello baby" to my tummy! we were shocked. Turns out she knew far more than we had given her credit for. Interestingly, since the day we found out she has also been very clingy to me and is absolutely fascinated by my breasts - she keeps wanting to hug them and kiss them!!!

She has been very sweet about the baby and it has been much better to now be able to explain "mummy feels sick and needs to lie down" when we can also explain that it is a lot of work to help baby brother or sister to grow.

Every family is different and I know people who waited until much later in the pregnancy, when the chance of miscarriage lessened greatly. For us though we felt that, if we did loose the baby, we wanted to be able to talk it through with our daughter too.

[mama_daba]

before i got pregnant talked to son some about how papa and mama might try and make a baby and when i got the positive test i told everyone int he house so partner and son. he is 3 this Wednesday and he talks a lot and asks lots of questions and i have no idea how i could wait to tell him since i am around him all day every day. he sleeps curled up next to me i am hoping somehow by the time the baby comes we will have a sleeping arrangement that can work. i hope to tandem nurse but wondering if he will wean when my milk changes.