Oh, and to answer the OP's question... We chose to do embryo donation instead of traditional adoption.
Our three reasons were very simple to us. The first was we found that is was difficult for "non-traditional" couples to adopt both domestically and internationally unless were were open to special needs. We called and e-mailed several agencies and many refused to work with us because we were a lesbian couple or because we did not attend church regularly. Many agencies also told us that most birth mothers prefer heterosexual, married Christan couples and I felt like it was a waste of my time to go through a process where DW and I would be considered the bottom of the barrel in regards to familial preferences. International adoption was out because we would have to misrepresent our family in order to adopt. We didn't feel comfortable being in the closet and jeopardizing the entire program for single women just to have a baby
The second reason was because adoption was expensive. I understand that foster care is affordable but the process is unpredictable and most of the children have medical needs that we were not comfortable with. We didn't feel like we could parent a child with FAS or severe emotional disorders. We looked into domestic adoption but most agencies told us the entire cost would be at least 20K and the cheaper agencies had extremely long time lines. International adoption would cost at least 25K and we could not afford to spend that much money after wasting 50K on failed at home insemination with donor sperm, IUIs and IVF cycles.
The third reason was because of thought of "advertising" for a baby. I didn't feel like it was my job to "prove" to a birth mother that I was the perfect parent, that my partner and I had the biggest house in the best school district in the middle of the cookie cutter suburbs or that we drove brand new cars and plan on buying a mini van once the baby came home. I didn't feel comfortable plastering photos of DP and I playing with my friend's children and pretending that our relationship with our parents is flawless and they don't see anything wrong with two lesbians wanted to become mommies. To me, it seemed stupid for us to explain to a complete stranger how normal how my partner and I are when I know deep in my heart that we are eccentric and different and we don't plan on changing our lifestyle for a birth mother to consider us.
After hitting a brick wall with all of the adoption options, we decided to try embryo donation for our second child. When we went to the clinic for my mock transfer, they treated DP and I like any other couple. We were given the "list" of available embryos and we chose my daughter's biological family because we had a special connection with them. They both had the same careers as DP and I, they had similar personalities to us and they were okay with Black lesbians parenting an Asian child. approximately 1 year later for that day I was laying in the hospital with our daughter. It was the most exciting and happiest day of my life despite the fact I was naked and bloody in front of complete strangers and had cramps that hurt so badly. I wouldn't trade our experience for the world and we're doing it again for the next child.