Second-time moms, what do(did) you need for new baby?

[crunchy_mommy]

I want to get a small gift for my friend's second baby (due in a couple months) and I'm trying to figure out what would be most useful. I don't know if she has a ton of baby stuff from the first (she moved back to the country after the first was born) but it sounds like she has acquired a lot of the basics already, plus lots of hand-me-down clothes etc. First child was a boy and this one is a girl.

So the only ideas I have...

-a new cute outfit (since the ones she has are used and... pink... she hates pink...)
-a wooden rattle or toy (she probably doesn't have many wooden baby toys, & she recently shunned plastics)
-a 'free coupon' for me to watch her older DS a couple times (though I've never babysat him so I'm not positive she'd want me to, I *think* she would?)
-a homemade moby-style wrap (not sure if she has one already but maybe something really pretty?)
-cloth diapers, but I could only afford maybe 2 or 3 & she already has another system she uses...

...that's all I can really think of. So, now that your second baby is here, are there things you would have appreciated? Any ideas I'm not thinking of?

[chattyprincess]

if she is a good friend I would ask if there is anything she needs first...its amazing how the price of things like soothers, breast pads, bottles/nipples for pumping, spare pump parts etc tend to add up.
fav thing I got this time I never had with dd1 was a zipper style swaddle blankets (like a woombie)

[Norasmomma]

A moby wrap was essential for me with my second. He didn't like being put down, and I had a very active 3 year old.

The nicest gift I got though was a beautiful gift basket from my BIL and SIL with baked goods, a pack of diapers, some nice flour sack towels, body lotion and wash for me and the baby. It was very thoughtful and nice.

[Perdita_in_Ontario]

The only thing I really *needed* for my second were small cloth diapers, as I started CDing DD later. But it's fun to buy a couple of luxury items because you *don't* have to buy the other stuff! A really cute outfit, an expensive plush CD, etc.

One of the best things I got was a gift certificate to a consignment store (they had new baby products too, and baby carriers etc). I built an entire wardrobe for my DS from consignment articles because they cost so much less than new.

[octobermom]

I "needed" everything with over 7 years between kids 3 misscarriages etc I'd gotten rid of just about evrything so for me it was like starting totally over again.

Deanna

[Terrilein]

Ditto what octobermom said. Add to that a good coffee source and more Me-Time. And anything to keep the immune system intact. I find that between the baby's demands and my partner and dd draining the last bits of any energy I've got, I feel very fragile and vulnerable to every little thing going around.

[waiting2bemommy]

I didn't have anything really from ds except a few random clothing articles and his first shoes (which were obviously boy shoes, anyway). So I needed everything.

Some things I would have liked to have been given:

some good coffee!!! lol when I was pregnant with ds my dad bought me this big gift basket of starbucks stuff and I thought that was so appropriate for a working single mom....I drank every drop of coffee from that basket!

a gift certificate to buy myself some clothes.....I have heard from a lot of moms that after the 2nd baby they don't bounce back as quickly and it is very disheartening to only have 2 pairs of pants to choose from or whatever.


some stuff that will be necessary but isn't necessarily cute or exciting like
breast pads
lanolin
mother's milk tea
gripe water
teething tablets
baby socks (I don't know why, but no matter how often I buy them, I never have any....maybe it's just me)
a big old economy size box of wipes if she uses disposable ones, or some nice cloth ones otherwise.
baby soap/lotion/shampoo etc
a food grinder/processor (I have the munchkin brand one, a hand grinder and love it) for when the baby starts eating solids

it seems like everyone buys for the first few months and then the newborn stage is over and you need a whole bunch of stuff.

[Nicole730]

pacifiers - if she uses them, you don't want to reuse
bibs - I noticed all of ours were really "boy"
cute outfits not in pink are always a plus
cloth diapers - who cares if not the 'same', it's fun to try new stuff!
nursing tank top
moby/homemade stretchy wrap is an awesome idea!
those mesh feeder things - not something I wanted to reuse from kid to kid
wooden toys/rattle a good idea too

[sunnygir1]

What I needed most that I didn't realize in advance was clothes, especially onesies for the age/size when they start scooting and crawling. I had saved dd's, but they were hopelessly stained from her drooling on them and then mopping the floor with her chest! I got ds some new ones, which he promptly did the same thing to!

[mommariffic]

ME TIME! Having friends come over and hang with DD [most brought her something as well, a little potted plant, a sheet of stickers] was amazing. I was able to focus on the babe while she was being smothered in love as well.

[EzzysMom]

Just had my second, and what we need are: meals, vacuuming, laundry and cleaning. Babies need so little and can always wear mis-gendered clothes as need be, they don't give a hoot. I'd ask though, she's probably got a list.

[3xMama]

I'd definately ask her if she needs anything. If she doesn't, I'd throw together a few essentials in a basket and wrap it up all pretty. I'd include some pacis, nursing pads, a larger size outift or jammies around 9 mos (like a PP said, everyone gets so many clothes for the first couple of months that a few larger outfits are welcome), a toy or two, anything that struck me as useful/fun in the baby isle. I'd probably also include some babysitter coupons, a frozen meal or a notice of frozen meals to come and offer to drop by and do the dishes or something for her after the baby was born. Of course, for the last ones, it depends on where you are and if you really have that ability.

The best thing I got was a wrap from my friend. I wish I had gotten meals and help around the house. That would've been the awesome.

[crunchy_mommy]

Thanks for all the suggestions!! I saw her this morning & did get a slight idea of what she needs so I'm thinking of doing a cute, larger-size outfit, a babysitting coupon, and a small toy or something. I wish I could do frozen meals and stuff but I seriously can't even manage to cook for my own family most days lol!!!!

[hakeber]

Bibs, t-shirts, and recieving blankets for the baby.

For me, cute nursing gear, a gift certificate to a clothing store, and a day out with the girls...oh man, I could really use a girl's night!

[hakeber]

Originally Posted by crunchy_mommy

Thanks for all the suggestions!! I saw her this morning & did get a slight idea of what she needs so I'm thinking of doing a cute, larger-size outfit, a babysitting coupon, and a small toy or something. I wish I could do frozen meals and stuff but I seriously can't even manage to cook for my own family most days lol!!!!

Sounds like such a cute idea! Instead of frozen meals Maybe there is a restaurant in your area that would do a gift voucher for a free meal delivery for her?

By a larger outfit, do you mean for the baby or for her? Becuase if you mean for her maybe give her a gift certificate. I find my husband always tries to buy me clothes and they are never the right size and post-partum this just drives to tears wherein I lock myself in the closet for hours and refuse to go out of the house for days. Clothing for women PP can be very sensitive.

[crunchy_mommy]

Originally Posted by hakeber

Sounds like such a cute idea! Instead of frozen meals Maybe there is a restaurant in your area that would do a gift voucher for a free meal delivery for her?

By a larger outfit, do you mean for the baby or for her? Becuase if you mean for her maybe give her a gift certificate. I find my husband always tries to buy me clothes and they are never the right size and post-partum this just drives to tears wherein I lock myself in the closet for hours and refuse to go out of the house for days. Clothing for women PP can be very sensitive.

Oh no -- I meant for the baby I would never try to buy clothes for a post-partum mom lol. I'll have to check into meal delivery (though this may be getting beyond what my finances will allow but it would be nice...)

[texmati]

I wonder if you could get a gift cert to one of those cleaning companies.

[BetsyS]

I splurged on a swaddle blanket with baby #3 (Aden and Anais). I love that thing!!! It was a great splurge for me.

[girlzmommy00]

If you buy a bigger sized outfit for down the road, maybe find out how quickly her other baby grew but I agree, that's a great idea.

With DS, everyone bought big for the future which would have been awesome but was so off on sizing so I couldn't use any of it. I have big kids (DS is 9 months & wears a 2T) & my girlfriends all have children who wear the same size as their age (or smaller).

I'm not a cook either maybe a couple of the Amy's organic frozen pizzas? It would be something easy to throw in the oven & it's good for you. They have dairy free & rice crust options, too if they have food restrictions. Our favorite here is the spinach one but they have plain, too.

[beebalmmama]

It was nice to get some things that I just couldn't afford with ds 1 but wished I had.

My best friend got me:

An ergo with the infant insert (I had a wrap but always wanted an Ergo as well).
Paci's -these she actually ran out and bought me when she saw me distressed with trying to nurse ds 2 when he just wanted to suck.
Lots of visits and play time with my older ds 1, who adores her.

Also nice was a couple of new outfits for baby.
Someone did give me more cloth breast pads which were helpful.
I got some great new big swaddling blankets which were so much nicer than the ones I had. I've noticed their seem to be a lot more swaddling type blankets than I ever found with ds 1.
Lots of delivered meals!!! We had a crazy start with ds 1 with moving following the birth and just no time to lie in. So with ds 2 I made sure I had a two week lie in. Lots of family time at home and dh's co-workers were the best at delivering meals enough to feed us for four weeks +!
Bigger clothes in seasons that fit ds 2. My oldest was a summer baby and my second was a winter baby. So it seemed like for this first year I had to buy quite a few things. For example I had no summer clothes in 6-9 months for ds 2 (because ds 1 was already a year old in the summer).