Birth "Kit" for 3.5 year old big brother

[possum]

We are looking forward to welcoming a new baby very soon. While going through my birth kit to make sure everything was in order, my 3.5 year old was super-excited about the gloves and wanted to know if he could wear some at the birth. He is also totally psyched about the special foods and drinks we have for the birth. (Juice is a treat here, and the midwives like dark chocolate which we never have. He can't even imagine what is in a Larabar!)
We have a wonderful friend who will be here to help him during the birth.
I was thinking to put together a little birth kit of things for him - both things to entertain him and things for him to use to help.
So far, I was thinking to get some gloves at the drug store and some sort of fancy cup for him to pour water over me in the birth pool.
What are some other things that would be good to include in a big brother's birth kit?
TIA,
Melinda

[Turquesa]

Do you have other children besides your DS? Have you done a birth with siblings before? Having him there will be unpredictable. I hear of some small children who behave beautifully and participate fully in the birth of a small sibling. Others....not so much.

We had on-site child care for DD, and DH was smart to recommend that we hide away some new toys to keep her excited and occupied during the birth. Seeing me in such an intense state was kind of stressful for her, so it worked out really well when the sitter brought her into another room to play with the new toys--floor puzzles, giant building blocks, etc.

I guess my point is to consider including some new (or at least new to your DS even if they're technically used) toys in your birth kit. You may end up needing them, and you may not. Have a wonderful birth!

[smeep]

My DS will be 5 when this baby is born. I never thought about seeing if he wanted stuff like gloves or a cup for pouring water on me! What a great idea!

I was thinking of taking him out to get some special stuff for the birth about a month before. Let him pick out a couple new special toys and some activity books and then put them in a bag and put it up so he can't play with any of it until the birth...that way it's all new and exciting for him. We'll be birthing at a FSBC and my midwife does have toys there, but I figured a couple ones specifically for him to keep would be nice.

[HeatherB]

What a sweet idea! I have never thought of doing a set of birth supplies for the big brothers. My MW asked if she can give them specific things to do - like hold this towel, etc., at the birth. I loved the idea of them having tasks to help out!

I also have my own list of things they can do - like help get me water, hold the cup for me, greet people who are coming (birth attendants and photographer) and show them where we are, help people find things in the house, etc. Granted, my boys are now 8.5, 6, and 3, so a lot of that is really for the older two.

I also have a new toy/project for them that I'll give them when labor begins. It's a cardboard, child-sized castle that they can decorate. I'm figuring that (along with their other toys) will keep them occupied for the less-interesting parts of labor. I'm happy for them to come and go as they please, and my mom will be here with them to help out.

Trying to think of other things... What about a t-shirt that says Big Brother? New toys/crayons/coloring books/movie/books about a new baby/etc. are all good. Maybe a disposable camera (or any camera you don't mind him using!) to take pictures at the birth?

Post back on how it goes!

[IdentityCrisisMama]

Cute idea!! I will do this for DS as well...she'll LOVE it!! Sorry, no good ideas right now - though maybe you could leave him in charge of extra receiving blankets or the little hat, mittens and etc. He could be the "keeper" of somethings that you'll want a couple of hours after birth.

[possum]

Thanks for the ideas, mamas!
We went out today and got a t-shirt (and I can do an iron-on that says something about the big brother), some batteries for our back-up camera which he loves to use, bendy straws (like the ones in my birth kit), some little toys (a couple duplo mini-sets, slinky, those shaped rubber band things that everyone has and he always wants to buy out of machines), crayola fun foam, gloves, four rainbow cups on clearance from the summer stuff, and some Larabars just for him.
I think I will also put the fishy net from the birth kit in his box. He was really thrilled when we got it a while back and was not at all turned-off when I told him what it was for. He just said, "After we use it for dipping up poop in the water can we wash it, and I can have it?"
I like the idea of including something that he can give me and/or the baby after the birth - maybe a t-shirt for the baby???, and our midwife and my son's birth companion will be sure to include him whenever he is interested and an opportunity arises.

Keep the ideas coming!
Thanks again, mamas.
Melinda

[LightForest]

Originally Posted by possum

"After we use it for dipping up poop in the water can we wash it, and I can have it?"

Oh man that just made my day


I've seen some really cute medical kits online with toy versions of a fetoscope and other "homebirthey" supplies... Maybe on etsy? I'll try to remember where I saw those.

I love the idea of a special shirt/hat/blankie/diaper for him to help dress the baby in once it's born.

[HeatherB]

Sounds awesome!

I love the idea of "homebirthey" supplies from etsy... If you come up with links, please share!

[erin_brycesmom]

I don't have any supplies to suggest other than what has already been suggested but just had to say that I love the idea of a big brother birth kit - so cute!

[possum]

I just thought of another must have supply: a flash light. We have a mini maglight like the bigger one in the birth kit, so this one's a freebie for us - yay!

I was also thinking to get a little mirror and some kind of travel-sized lotion or oil. He likes those kinds of things, and I have a mirror and various bottles/"potions" in the birth kit.

[possum]

. . . and I think I'll make a pouch sling for his babies with fabric I have in my stash.

[Treeof3]

I take my kids to buy a birth day present for the new baby and the new baby always brings a present for them. The first time my ds was 2.5. He didn't participate in the birth (he was asleep) but when he woke up to his new sister, he was VERY excited to give her the present he'd picked out (a shirt) and insisted she wear it right away. The second time, my dd was 3.5. She was able to use scissors and had asked ahead of time if she could cut the cord, so the mw let her her. The mw said she would "help" dd do it so the baby wouldn't get hurt. LOL! Dd was super proud to have her "job" to look forward to. Ds was 6 at that birth and he was allowed to hold the baby "first". We gave the baby to him while I got out of the tub and settled into bed. Also a proud moment.

Ds also used a pen and paper at that birth to "take my order" for water/food etc. He was shown where the supplies were kept and put in charge of fetching them as needed. (hat, blankets, placenta bowl).

It was an awesome experience for our whole family to have them involved like that. We'll be doing it again in early January when ds 2 will be 2.5yo. I will have someone come to be there with him or leave with him if needed so that the other 2 can be involved as they wish. But there will be presents again!! My ds1 is now 8 and STILL treasures the Buzz Lightyear his sister brought him when she was born (even tho he 'knows' she didn't pick it out or anything).

[Carlyle]

My sister bought dd some "big sister" presents that she wrapped and mailed to us (it was NEW craft supplies).  Dd had to wait until the baby was coming to open the present.  It was the best idea!  When she woke up at 5:30am to scary noises from me (moaning and such), she was still excited to open the presents and was able to keep herself occupied with them until my mom could get there to watch her (5 minutes).  Then my mom was able to take her out of the house and keep her happily entertained with the new crafts during the moaning part of the birth (which dd did not like...I also found I couldn't labor well while I could hear her voice--popped me into "mom mode" instead of "labor mode").  We called them on speed dial for the last 10 minutes of pushing and they were able to come back in and watch.  It was perfect for us since dd was scared by the noise and the blood and I was having a hard time laboring with her there.  By the time I was pushing and baby was crowning, I didn't care WHO was in the room...nothing was holding me back, and it was short enough that dd didn't get scared   Hope you find what works for you!