Maybe I'm not a dog person after all

[Kuba'sMama]

Now before I get flamed for this, let me point out this is more of a *feeling* than a behaviour. Our dog is loved, well taken care of, fed raw food, walked daily, snuggled affectionately and considered part of the family. She goes to the vet and is vaccinated regularly.

It's just.... she's so repulsive sometimes! I'm an introverted person and certain things just, well... gross me out She loves to lick, I detest being licked. She licks herself, smacking loudly. She licks the couch (not compulsive, just sticky children's food remnants). She will get into the diaper when I change my baby and eat the poo:Puke

I have 3 kids now (including a breastfeeding 5 month old) and I'm all touched out. I hate that I feel guilty for not showering her with affection every second she needs it (or want it, I don't know anymore). She looks at me sadly sometimes. Thankfully my dh gives her lots of love (too much I think) and especially my middle dd as well.

So, sorry about the ramblings, I guess the main point is, I love her but I'm just shocked about the "dogness" of her. I don't know if I'm meeting all her emotional needs (shes my first ever dog). I probably would do better with a cat, but am horribly allergic.
She's a tiny shitzu/maltese cross BTW. Thoughts? Commiserations? No criticism please, I feel badly enough.

[zebra15]

I feel your pain... I like my sons dog ( a french bull dog) but I dont like my roommates dog- a bernese mountain dog- and the dog is part of the reason we are moving soon.
Notice I said "like"....Im not sure I've moved over to 'love' yet

[OkiMom]

I don't like small dogs I just don't like them. I like big dogs but small ones I figure whats the use just get a cat (yea, I know they are different, just saying to me Id rather have a cat then a small dog).
You have a young nursing baby, when I have a nursling its hard enough for me to give enough attention to the humans in my life, dogs don't' get the attention. I wouldn't/didn't ignore them (we don't currently have a dog) however they were last on my importance list for emotional support. She was well taken care of (walked, fed, took out, played with, petted, brushed) but I let my DH take care of the loving, doting attention she liked to have.
Cut yourself some slack. It might not be that you don't' like the dog, it might just be with everything else on your plate its just one more thing you don't want to deal with. Its the reason I advice people not to get or give away pets when they have a young baby/are pregnant, you don't know how you will feel in 2, 3, 4,5, 6 months down the line. We gave away our husky when I was pregnant (ended up being a good decision because we had to move to a place without pets) and I regretted it two weeks after I did it. She drove me nuts and grossed me out at times but I missed her when she wasn't there. I still miss her and wish we didn't live in a place that didn't allow cats/dogs because I know she would have been great for both me and my girls.

[Ola_]

I'll bet it varies with doggie personality too and how it meshes with yours. One of our dogs is very "doggie" while the other one is really a big cat. Just like some people like dogs that visibly adore them and will get upset if the dog seems aloof or independent and the person doesn't feel loved/needed.

Overall dogs are very adaptable. And you know, often they really love the people who play "hard to get", it's like a challenge.

[mattemma04]

I can relate. I love/hate my 2 dogs. I have had a few over the years and there is always something about them that really bothers me.

Lol, I hate that licking sound too.My one likes to lick his feet over and over.

Worse though is my dogs have a habit of not wanting to *hold it* till I take them out.Never had this issue before.One time the dog actually got off the couch,went and peed in the kitchen,then went back up to the couch. Now I limit locations and don't leave food/water out 24/7,but they still won't hold it.I was gone for 1 hour today and came home to pee in the crate,and I had just pottied them before leaving!

All the hair all over and the puke.Ugh.I really want to keep a dog,but all the little things just drive me nuts.

[stardogs]

OP training might help with all the things you talk about. I am a dog nut (I train dogs for a living, compete with them, share my home with 3 currently, etc.) but I too hate the feeling of a dog licking me or the sound of them licking themselves, so I taught them to not lick me (I got up and moved away when they did, you can also try something distasteful on you like Vicks or bitter apple spray) and to stop licking themselves when I ask (ask to stop and then redirect to something else or reward if they paused).

A leave it cue would fix the diaper issue and some of the licking as well. You could even teach her to go to a specific spot when you need your space or she's getting in the way - both of my dogs have been taught to go to their beds and stay there or to do a long down stay when asked.

Of course all of that does require time, which is in short supply, so remember you can break training sessions into tiny bits - I really like keeping sessions less than 5 mins and you'd be surprised what you can accomplish with 2 minutes. Clicker training can also make training sessions work when you are on the couch or unable to move about for whatever reason as the clicker will mark the correct behavior at a distance.

www.clickersolutions.com/articles is a great place to start if you're interested.

[Doodlebugsmom]

Originally Posted by stardogs

OP training might help with all the things you talk about. I am a dog nut (I train dogs for a living, compete with them, share my home with 3 currently, etc.) but I too hate the feeling of a dog licking me or the sound of them licking themselves, so I taught them to not lick me (I got up and moved away when they did, you can also try something distasteful on you like Vicks or bitter apple spray) and to stop licking themselves when I ask (ask to stop and then redirect to something else or reward if they paused).

.

Reading this thread to the sound of my 15-year-old cocker mix licking herself on the dog bed beside me. I used to be able to just say "Maggie, stop." She would stop. Now she's deaf, so I have to give her a gentle tap and get eye contact. Then I look at her with raised eyebrows and she stops. She will also lick a person as much as they'll let her. If she's doing it to me, I just give her the eyebrows and she'll stop. My pup, a husky/pyr mix doesn't seem to be much of a licker. I love a nice kiss on the face when I ask for it. When I get one from her it's a real treat. I think I've gotten 2 kisses in the 4 months that we've had her. With my cocker mix, all I have to do is get close to her, get eye contact, and pucker up!

[wholewheatchick]

I used to love dogs, totally and completely, and now I have no interest in EVER owning a dog--the dogness, as you said, is too much for me. DH and I got a cat when we first got married, and I love him. I do. But ever since I got pregnant, I just haven't wanted him around. I mean, he's still cute and we take good care of him and he still sleeps on our bed and everything, I just feel like I am not as affectionate with him as I used to be. I think that for me, it is because the cat used to be my baby, but now I am going to have a real baby, so I don't *need* the cat in the same way anymore. Kitty and I will work it out, though; and I'm sure you and your dog will, too!

[Aeress]

I think it is normal. I love all my kids, I do, but sometimes one is going through a phase and driving me nuts and one is into something I am not into etc.

I am the same way with my dog- she gets her walks, we play, we cuddle but yes, today she is driving me nuts and I am very frustrated with her. Yesterday, we had a super fun day together but today, not feeling the love. haha

Honestly, it sounds like she has a good life. My middle dd adores animals and gives extra snuggles and once my hubby is home, he will love on her as well- it all balances out.

It is about balance and the dog is part of the family.

[LeahBoo]

You don't have to interact with the dog at all. I know people treat their dogs like little people, but they are not. In the end, it's just a dog. I spoil my own, but I don't have kids. If I had kids, I'd fully expect them to accommodate, and let themselves be ignored occasionally, if not most of the time. Train her to stop licking you (a firm NO, and push her face away when she does it), teach a leave it command for the diapers (ew! lol), DO NOT feel guilt for not giving her attention, and repeat to yourself "It's just a dog".

[celerydunk]

Thankfully my dh gives her lots of love (too much I think) and especially my middle dd as well.

This sentence jumped out at me. I'm asking this in the nicest possible way, but is it possible you are jealous/resentful of the attention the dog gets? This happened to a friend of mine. She felt she did all the work around the house while the dog spent the day lounging. Her husband would come home and make a big fuss over the dog so she started to hate the dog. She had just had a baby too, and once her life got back to "normal" she said it faded away. It's kinda funny to think of being jealous of a dog but on some days doing nothing but laying around waiting on belly rubs and dinner sounds nice.

I also wonder if you are putting too much pressure on yourself. If the dog is getting plenty of attention from other family members, and all the physical care she needs - it sounds like you don't really need to do anything. She will be just fine.

[moondiapers]

This disgusting snorting and licking mucousy sounds that our pug makes make me gag, add in his breath and......

I just give him a breath mint and keep on loving him, LOL.

[Learning_Mum]

I'm an introvert as well, and I find dogs hard. I love dogs. I love to play with them and cuddle them but I find it hard that they neeeeed so much attention.

I would like to get a dog some day but I know it would have to be when all the kids are in school. It's too much like adding another child to the house and I'm already all needed out as it is.

I think dogs are harder for introverts. Some people love that their dog is their best friend and goes everywhere with them. I can safely say that I don't even want to go everywhere with my kids! That's why we have three cats. Cats come for love. They provide company but at the end of the day they are independent and like their alone time as well!