Originally Posted by Arduinna
well your nephew is also family and in the hypothetical question in the OP is being irrevocably and heinously hurt by another family member that is supposed to be protecting him.
This is my *actual* family you're talking about. Real people behind the computer screen here. *waves*
If I cut out my sister (which I have absolutely NO interest in doing anyhow) I'd also be cutting out my nephew. So, how the heck is that helping him in any way? If he knows the truth then he'd grow up thinking that it was somehow his fault that my sister and I didn't talk anymore. If he didn't know the truth he'd think there was some other crazy reason his aunt wasn't part of the family. How is that helping anybody? At best it would leave me not being part of his life, not having any influence, and not getting to see him grow up. At worst it would "irrevocably and heinously hurt" him to know that his freakin' penis was the reason his mom and her sister were no longer close.
Originally Posted by savithny
And so you would cut your nephew out of your life as well, because of something that happened to him that was out of his control? If you disown his parents, you're pretty sure to be disowning him as well.
And, how about ILs? They circed my husband. Perhaps I should have created huge strife in my life and refused to ever meet them because they did what THEY THOUGHT WAS THE BEST THING. And, had I done that, I would have never ended up marrying my husband. Therefore I'd not have my husband or my beautiful daughter.
Also, I happen to be pretty fond of my husband's penis, circed or not.
I think that if you'd cut out your sister (or cousin or aunt or whatever) and therefore cut out your nephew that you're just adding a great disservice on top of a sad decision.
How would you feel if your sister cut you out because she didn't believe in co-sleeping? That she thought you were putting your child in DANGER because you were co-sleeping. Well, I'm sure many of you would say good riddance because you don't seem to have strong bonds with your families. But for me- my mom didn't like the idea of cosleeping. But she accepted that it was my choice to make- even if she thought it was dangerous. And, I'm sure you'll say "but it's not dangerous" but to HER it is. So from HER angle it would be the same thing.
Gah, this thread is making me want to bash my head against the wall and cry. It's honestly making me consider cutting MDC out of my life (I'm sure a chorus of "good riddance" will follow).
I should thank you, though. I was feeling horribly sick about the fact that my sister circed her son. I was obviously not even considering cutting her out, but I was completely frustrated with her because of it. But, you've all helped me clarify my feelings and feel less angry with her. Thanks!