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A hill to die on - Page 3

post #41 of 43

I have 5 boys of my own...when the first three boys were born, I was very much bullied into letting "them" ( meaning Dr.'s , my DH and my MIL) have it done.  I had no back bone and basically had no resources to lay down an argument.  When the fourth boy was coming, I really tried to educate myself and I read a lot and decided not to let anyone bully me into another decision I knew in my heart was wrong.  I told DH that I would take my baby and leave and stay away until the baby was too old to circ. (at the time they only did at up to a certain time after birth).  I was using a midwife by then, I was going to a birth center, and my MIL lived no where around me.....DH "gave in" and after he got the same information I did, he totally changed his view about it.  It doesn't come up now and he totally is on board with leaving the boys intact.  

 

But I will tell you, that if he had not changed his mind, if he still felt the same way, if he was still as adamant as he was before...there would be HUGE issues in our marriage.  That would be a fight that I would not back down on.  It's amazing how strong you become when you really try to educate yourself.   It is very definitely a hill that I would die fighting on.

post #42 of 43

I made the circumcision decision clear to my husband before we got married.  There were a bunch of things we both set as "in stone" before we had children - for me, circumcision, going to church, gentle discipline.  For him, private school, physical activity, and naming our first boy David.  smile.gif 

 

I agree with PP, I don't think any marriage would end over just circumcision.  It would be a general inability to respect each others' opinions and choices. 

post #43 of 43

I have four girls and one boy. All of my children have intact genitals.

 

I understand what you are asking as far as trying not to alienate people when talking about circumcision. As someone who talks with families (sometimes I am the first person to ever bring it up with them) about circumcision, I have to be VERY cautious about how I go about it. Very often I am talking with dads and partners about what it actually is, and you have to be so careful to make sure that when you talk about the facts, you aren't at the same time, saying that they are "less".

 

I have a great website that people often see before meeting me, and that helps too. It has a great circumcision page, and I just might have to ask to add the 50 reasons to it!!

 

As far as my husband...I wouldn't choose to be with someone who wanted to cut any of my childrens genitals to make them look more attractive. Ten years ago, before I knew anything about circumcision (much less that there was something called a foreskin) I said to my husband...I think that they have to cut the penis somehow...and we both say no.

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