Why, why WHY won't this baby nap?

[mom2happy]

I am so tired of hearing everyone saying their babies take two 2 hour naps a day and go to bed at 7:30. None of mine did.
I dont even care about sttn.
Just give me one 1 hour nap and I'd be happy!
Mine have all been the same. Little 20 minute nap jokes.
This is the schedule for this one:
She wakes at 7:30 and likes to play with toys.
She nurses at 9AM and starts to drift, but always gets a second wind.
If I take her for a walk, go for a ride, or wear her she will take a little morning nap, but if not she wont take one till she wants to nurse again.
That is at about 11:30. Then she will do a 20 minute nap.
When I try to get her to go back nothing works.
Then she will take two more 20 minute naps at about 2:30 and then again at 5:30. She cant fall asleep until 9:00PM.
This is even her sleeping schedule if I wear her or hold her ALL day.
Is that crazy?

[Youngfrankenstein]

How old is she? Have you tried laying down with her? Sometimes if my LO is really needing sleep but not staying asleep, I lay in bed with her and she sleeps longer. There is a chance if you could try this she might be sleeping longer on her own.

If she is still tiny, ignore what I said!

[Mosaic]

DD1 was a nap-for-two-hours girl.

DD2 is a nap-for-20-minutes kind of girl. 6.5 months old and this is just what she has always done. If she's sick, we might get 45 min stints here and there, but that's it. So yes, I think that's just how some babies work!

[P.J.]

Sounds a lot like my baby!
He's 5 months and takes 3 or 4 naps per day, but they're 20-40 minutes long and that's it. The only time they're longer is if I or DH naps with him, and even then half the time he wakes us up after 30 minutes because he's over it. He also will not go to bed for the night until earliest 8:30, but usually more like 9, and lately it's been between 9 and 10. There have been times he went down for a late nap around 7 or 7:30pm and I was hoping he might actually stay asleep for the night, but he inevitably wakes up after 30 minutes. In fact, even when I put him down for the night, he still wakes after 30 minutes and I have to go in and nurse him back down. There are some nights he will keep waking up every 10 minutes after that and I finally have to give up, forget that small window of time DH and I have alone in the evening, and just go to sleep myself.

So far as I've read on this board, I think this short-sleep-cycle scenario is somewhat common.

[mom2happy]

Originally Posted by Youngfrankenstein

How old is she? Have you tried laying down with her? Sometimes if my LO is really needing sleep but not staying asleep, I lay in bed with her and she sleeps longer. There is a chance if you could try this she might be sleeping longer on her own.

If she is still tiny, ignore what I said!

She is 6 months. For my other one's I did lie down with them. It didn't lengthen their sleep cycle till they were about 1.5- 2 yrs old. Then they would sleep for about 1 hr if I stayed next to them and didn't move a muscle.

[Catubodua]

no advice, but lots of empathy. there are times i wish with all my heart that DS would just stay asleep for 10 more minutes.

[Parker'smommy]

sigh....it stinks, doesn't it?

My other two were BIG nappers... especially dd1. At 2 months of age she was taking 3 two hour naps a day and sometimes a "small" one hour nap in the late evening. She slept awful at night though...Dd still naps 1-2 hour naps at almost 6 years old.

Her baby sister? Oh heck no! lol....Today she was exhausted. That's the part that kills me. She's so tired. So sleep already! She cat napped on me - 10 min. here and there all day long until finally falling asleep in my arms for 2 hours at 4 pm. Luckily I was visiting my father and he took care of my other two kids while I held her on the couch. BUt that's just not feasible on other days, ya know?

I always heard about these kinds of kids....guess I got one! I'm trying to let go of it, and not let it get to me. I can't make her sleep. I just can't. I can try to parent her gently there, but in the end...it's her choice. I can't let that bother me, even though it does. Mostly it's because I know she needs more sleep than she's getting. And the other part, it just makes me all kinds of CRAZY...lol.

[october]

mom2happy, you pretty much described my 7mo Eden (save for the fact she goes to bed around 8, thankfully).

It is true, however, that if I'm in bed with her before she hits 30 minutes of sleep, she is more likely to sleep longer than 30. But *ALL* babies wake up after about 30 minutes, it's just that many are able to drift back to sleep effortlessly. It's easier for them to do so if they know you are there, but it's obviously not a guarantee. :/

Really, I just wanted you to know that you're not alone. Not at all.

[LadyCatherine185]

my DS did the same thing and slept horrible at night... really hoping #2 is a little better!

[SilverFish]

have you tried swaddling? even at 8 months, my dd still needs a swaddle sometimes to keep asleep past one sleep cycle.

also, when she wakes up, what happens? is she happy? does she just babble to herself? does she start screaming right away? does she whine and fuss? i ask because i've occasionally made the mistake of thinking dd is waking up from a nap, and swoop in and pick her up when really, if i'd just left her, she would have fallen back asleep. she has a very distinctive "get me out of here NOW" cry (sometimes angry, sometimes happy), but babbling or a bit of fussing usually means she might just fall back asleep, and seeing me usually wakes her up all the way. now i just peek in a bit at her and see what she's doing. the fussing post-waking up is really hard to gauge sometimes though...

it is weird though. sometimes she will have really great long naps throughout the day, sometimes it'll be 5pm and i'll realize she hasn't slept more than 30 min all day! i am really trying to release some of the frustration and tension i have about her unpredictable napping... i hate getting to the end of the day and feel like i've spent most of it trying to get her to sleep.

[Knitting Mama]

We still swaddle as well, at 7 months, and I don't see it going away any time soon. Sometimes Cecilia will nap unswaddled if she fell asleep in the car first, but otherwise, it just doesn't go too well without her swaddle blanket!

[mom2happy]

Originally Posted by SilverFish

have you tried swaddling? even at 8 months, my dd still needs a swaddle sometimes to keep asleep past one sleep cycle.

also, when she wakes up, what happens? is she happy? does she just babble to herself? does she start screaming right away? does she whine and fuss?

She fought the swaddle at 3 months. While I would try to nurse her swaddled so she could fall asleep, she would spend the whole time fighting until her hands were free.

When she wakes up she is definitely not done sleeping, but wont go back.
She cries, I go to get her, she whines for a minute and then starts to look around and gets excited.
She does this even when the room is dim and the other kids are at school.
She is just so happy to be alive and doesnt want to miss a thing.

[Parker'smommy]

Originally Posted by SilverFish

i am really trying to release some of the frustration and tension i have about her unpredictable napping... i hate getting to the end of the day and feel like i've spent most of it trying to get her to sleep.

I think this is SO key....spending your entire day trying to get someone to sleep is exhausting and not productive. You can only do so much and then you have to let yourself off the hook..ya know?

[guitarmama]

I took my ds to a sleep specialist for this problem. What she suggested and what worked was to hold him off for as long as possible. I didn't let him fall asleep earlier than 2 hours after waking in the morning and no eariler than 8am. After that, I didn't let him fall asleep before 11:45. For his 3rd nap, I didn't let him fall saleep before 3:30. These times were all recomended by the specialist. It started working almost right away. We went from 5, 20 minute naps a day (all while being held the whole time) to 3, 1-1.5 hour naps. The only way I was able to put him down asleep was to put him on his tummy. Good luck!!!

[camprunner]

DD2 NEVER napped. I took her to daycare at 6 weeks old. After two days, they said "You know she MIGHT take a 30 minute nap, but usually she just doesn't sleep". I was quite aware of that fact. She did appear to sleep in 3 hour intervals at night but she would just sit and look at everyone all day at daycare and insisted on being in my arms at home. She DID take a nap on the rare occasion that I left her with dh. It was almost cruel. I never got a break but the minute I was out of sight, she's go right to sleep until the minute I walked in the door! She is fine though. No worse for not taking the newborn naps. It did take us 4 years to even consider having a third though.

[LiamsMommy]

Yep, Yep and Yep. Mom of two non-sleeping babies here. They nap in arms and fall asleep at night there. Then go to bed with me. It will pass as you know. Some of us just don't get sleepers. Hang in there!

[Elismum]

Completely commiserate! No insight really. My 3 mo old DD is better than my DS was but both of them were and are unpredictable which is tough, too. Most days, 20 minutes here and there but every 4th day or so, a 2 hour nap that completely throws me and I don't know what to do with myself. With my DD, I've had a little luck with swaddling when she's really sleepy (not when she's wide awake, because she constantly tries to free her little hands) and then when she wakes up after 10 minutes, going to her and giving her a pacifier (I know some may be against that . . .) to soothe her just long enough to fall back asleep. This works every so often. Have you read the No Cry Sleep Solution? There are some general tips in there about trying to extend sleep times. Some may work for you and others might not but I found it a useful reference and gives you stuff to try.