Kissing baby too little or too much?

[germin8]

A lady at our church said to us that we should kiss our DD often. (We have a 4 month old.) She has a genuine interest for the well being of our DC. I was kind of surprised by her comments... but glad to see church family caring for us (our family is not here).

So, I'm not wondering how much is too much or too little... but rather, what if one parent kisses the child 10 times more (random number there) than the other parent. Will this be a problem later? ("Problem" is not the right word here... but, you know what I mean...) Will DD feel less loved by the parent that kisses her less? Should parents kiss in front of child as often as DD is being kissed?

Am I just silly for thinking this way?

[Mackenzie]

As long as the child is being show affection, I don't see what the problem is with how it comes

[cappuccinosmom]

Agree with the previous post.

Don't obsess over this. Don't take a poll. Just show your baby affection in the best way you know how. People are different, parents are going to have differences in how they show affection. If there is love in the home, those differences are not going to matter.

[Joyster]

Is this your first baby? I'm not asking because I'm trying to be snarky, I just think it's sweet.

I kiss my babies often, way often, I can't stop. There is no way DH can keep up with me. The boys are just as bonded with DH as they are me. You'll find that they bond to different parents in different ways based on your personalities and how you interact, but as long as they feel that love and security, I wouldn't worry about if they will.

[lilyka]

oh man, with babies I just planted my lips on their head when it was close enough which was most of the time. Its like a magnet

There are no rules. Show her love, be affectionate and do what feels right to you. Don't worry about what the other parent is doing. So long as you both love her and show her affection. She is in not counting kisses and either should you.

[mom2happy]

I am a non stop kisser too. I want to eat my babies cheeks and bellies and smell their breaths constantly.
DH only gets to be around them at night and his five oclock shadow makes them cry when he tries to give too many kisses. He has to stretch his lips out and only give a few. He shows his affection in other ways; holding, playing, tickling, singing....
As far as kissing in front of the kids and babies; they see us kiss hello and goodbye with a quick peck and everyonce in a while a long hug.
They are all affectionate and feel very loved.
Who ever is home with them more will have the most physical contact, but it doesnt matter.
When DH is around they are stuck to him like glue.
Parents cant be the same. As long as they know how loved they are in many different ways they will be happy.

That is a really cute question, and yes, you should give as many kisses as the baby likes to have every minute of everyday!

[starbuckmom]

I started kissing my kids while we were in the hospital shortly after they were born and told them to get used to it cause it would happen often

I am constantly rubbing someones head, kissing their necks, arms, hands, whatever is closest to me.

My kids know they are well loved!

[Mosaic]

I agree that showing affection in the way that comes most naturally to you is best, both for you and for your LO. If that's not kissing, fine! Kissing or hugging because you "have" to or feel you "should" surely doesn't impact the child or mold the relationship as true affection would in any format.

That said, this article gave me an extra excuse to smooch my kiddos. I admit thought that I'm a very huggy/kissy mom and person in general.

[Super~Single~Mama]

I'm SO GLAD I'm not the only non-stop kisser out there! Oh man, my ds is going to be so sick of getting kisses when he's older.....I just figure I have a limited time to plant them whenever I want so I'm taking advantage of it

I started as soon as he was born (my midwife asked me how I got blood on my face, and it was b/c I was kissing my baby and rubbing heads with him (he had blood on his face at birth - it was mine, no biggie), and I haven't stopped since!

I firmly believe that babies can't get too many kisses!!!!!

[texmati]

Originally Posted by germin8

A lady at our church said to us that we should kiss our DD often. (We have a 4 month old.) She has a genuine interest for the well being of our DC. I was kind of surprised by her comments... but glad to see church family caring for us (our family is not here).

So, I'm not wondering how much is too much or too little... but rather, what if one parent kisses the child 10 times more (random number there) than the other parent. Will this be a problem later? ("Problem" is not the right word here... but, you know what I mean...) Will DD feel less loved by the parent that kisses her less? Should parents kiss in front of child as often as DD is being kissed?

Am I just silly for thinking this way?

Not silly at all! In our home, we found a solution to this problem-- The Triple Kiss.

One of you holds baby, and then you both kiss him 3 times. Then baby and DH kisses you 3 times, and then you and baby kiss DH 3 times. You have to make loud kissing noises and have lots of giggling in order to be effective.

We do this everyday when I come home from work! I can definitely say that it puts a smile on everyone's face.

[meemee]

well no one gives our children a manual that says you 'should be' kissed so many times.

so what you do is what the baby knows.

having said that for me - how do you NOT kiss the baby. if anything i used to give my dd our regular early morning thousand kisses. i started day one... and now i can no longer kiss my dd in public. yet she still loves to be kissed and tickled at home and looooves listening to how i would kiss her when she was a baby.

her dad is not a kisser. i dont think he really ever kissed her much when she was a baby. he was rather scared of her. however he had his way of showing love. taking her for a walk in his arms and have her stroke the tree trunks and electric pole... singing to her on the guitar...

to date he has his ways and i have mine. dd loves us equally. we are both equally important in her life.

however i do much more physical touching and allowing dd to misbehave and throw tantrums at home and have her say in almost everything. she says 'mom you understand me, dad doesnt.'

[MaerynPearl]

Im sure my mom kissed me more than my dad... but i dont remember. dont think that had any effect on how much i felt like they cared about me though... they had their ways of showing it.

I think the only time you can kiss a baby too much is if its mouth-to-mouth and either you have thrush... or baby does and you have a bad immune system (personal experience there, nephew had thrush, my mom didnt know... she was doing chemo for breast cancer.. caught the thrush... gave it to my son before she knew what it was)

[Norasmomma]

I really don't think babies keep tab on who kisses them the most, they just want love.

My Dh and I are affectionate people, we kiss each-other, make sure we get goodnight kisses, DD makes sure she gives me, DS and Daddy a kiss goodnight. I kiss DS all.the.time. he has cute baby cheeks and I just love how squishy sweet they are

We are a huggy, loving family.

[Thalia the Muse]

I don't see how anyone could NOT kiss their babies! Also, pretend to eat them. DD was very lucky to make it to toddlerhood with all her yummy little toes intact.

[3xMama]

Hug 'em and kiss 'em as much as you can for as long as they will let you! There's not a kiss quota you must meet or a kiss limit for the day, ya know?! And I've never heard of someone holding a grudge against a parent specifically because they weren't kissed enough. Babies/kids just need affection, it doesn't have to be kisses.

I also make sure to hug DD (4.5) until she pulls away. In the much closer than I want to believe future, I know hugs are going to become rare occurances. I savor all of 'em that I can get!!

[cocoanib]

Originally Posted by texmati

Not silly at all! In our home, we found a solution to this problem-- The Triple Kiss.

One of you holds baby, and then you both kiss him 3 times. Then baby and DH kisses you 3 times, and then you and baby kiss DH 3 times. You have to make loud kissing noises and have lots of giggling in order to be effective.

We do this everyday when I come home from work! I can definitely say that it puts a smile on everyone's face.

This puts a huge smile on my face
That's so sweet and special

[MamitaM]

I'm not sure how many kisses a day a baby should get,but I sure hope there is no limit of kisses or else I'm in so much trouble! We co-sleep so he gets about 20-30 good night kisses when I get into bed and I kiss him if he moves or if I wake up or if I feel like smelling him.... In the morning he gets about 300-500 kisses before we even get up!

[Ellien C]

Originally Posted by texmati

Not silly at all! In our home, we found a solution to this problem-- The Triple Kiss.

One of you holds baby, and then you both kiss him 3 times. Then baby and DH kisses you 3 times, and then you and baby kiss DH 3 times. You have to make loud kissing noises and have lots of giggling in order to be effective.

We do this everyday when I come home from work! I can definitely say that it puts a smile on everyone's face.

In our home we do: Everyone kiss left, now everyone kiss right, everyone kiss Daddy, everyone kiss mommy, everyone kiss big sister, everyone kiss baby!

I think everyone shows love in different ways. I think church lady was just trying to tell you to enjoy your baby and love on him. Don't get too caught up on her telling you to kiss him often. I don't think she meant it as a criticism of the amount of kissing you do. I think she was telling you to enjoy parenthood.

[henny penny]

Our variation is "family kisses". We smash all of our faces together at the same time for one big kiss. The wee ones love it and how silly it is. It worked well with just three of us; it's now a bit more tricky with a 5 month old thrown in the mix!
Yep, the baby gets lots of kisses in our house; and the occasional nibble! She is just so sweet!

[MusicianDad]

People express affection in different ways. While one parent may kiss a whole lots the other will have other things they do to show they love their kid.

And if lots of kisses were bad for babies, then DS is in big trouble. He still gets at least 30 kisses a day. Most from me since I'm home with him and I can't stop myself when he comes over for a cuddle. Yeah, there is some "nom nom"s going on too, more so now than when he was younger 'cause now it's guaranteed to elicit shrieks of laughter from him.

I also agree that she was really just telling you do enjoy your baby all you can.