Overdressed boy, undressed girls

[vhughes35]

Hi, I'm new here. I have 3 children, Jason, 15 and in 10th grade, Andrea, 14 and in 8th grade, and Sara, 12 and in 7th grade.

I'm not having any serious problems with my children at this time, but I've noticed something weird about them the last couple years and figured I'd get some opinions about it here. I've talked to some of my friends about it but most of them think I'm making a big deal about nothing, but I'm not so sure.

The problem is how they dress. Not when they're in public or at school, where they are expected to dress "properly", but around the house. Jason seems to always be overdressed, while Andrea and Sara seem to always be underdressed. Jason will ALWAYS wear baggy jeans, sweatshirts, and a winter hat, even in the summer. Ughhh! It looks ridiculous but whenever I complain to him about it he just says its "cool". It could be 90 degrees out but he will still dress like it's winter.

Andrea and Sara, on the other hand, will wear as little as possible, even in the dead of winter when its freezing out. At home, they generally wear short shorts and halter tops or crop tops, and they both insist on going barefoot and HATE wearing underwear. And it just looks so ridiculous for them to be acting as if its summer while the rest of us are in sweaters and bundled up in blankets. We even have a hot tub and sometimes after using it they will just walk around in their bikinis, even in January or February when it's bitter cold out and even drafty inside.

Has anyone else here ever experienced anything like this? And why do you think they insist on dressing so out-of-season like this, completely oblivious to the fact that they look so ridiculous?

[Smokering]

Well, it's pretty odd, but does it matter? They're the ones who have to deal with being too hot or too cold. Either they'll figure it out, or they simply place fashion over comfort - in which case they're definitely not alone in the world.

[mattemma04]

The only thing I have to remind with my kids is to put socks on. Our house temp is probably around 66,so they prefer to dress warmer. They do whine about putting on bigger coats when going to school during winter.I don't know what it is about dressing warm for school!

[cristeen]

Dont worry about how they look. Everybody has different standards for body temp. My stepmother has to wear a sweater until the temp approaches 100. But on a cold rainy day like yesterday (low 60s), i was running around the house in a pair of pj pants and nothing else.

When i lived in Russia, all the mothers fretted over me being too cold. I wore boots and a mid-weight coat w scarf. But i never wore a hat amd only rarely gloves. To them it was insane, but i was comfortable.

Trust them to know when they're cold. Make sure they have options and let themmdecide what to wear, they're old enough. The only time i'd get involved is if they're running around in very little and complaining of being cold (or vice versa).

[Norasmomma]

Well I kinda hate underwear too

[gcgirl]

In high school, I routinely wore black turtlenecks and jeans in 100+-degree weather. Teenagers are weird like that. As long as nobody gets heatstroke, I'd say don't worry about it.

[limabean]

I sometimes dressed ridiculously unseasonably as a teen too, but it was more at school, like if I got a new outfit I'd wear it the next day even if it meant I was freezing all day long.

With your kids, since they're doing it at home and not to show off, it might just be how they're truly comfortable.

[Storm Bride]

I personally wouldn't worry about this, but I would probably insist on the girls having warm clothes with them. Your son can take off his shirt if he does start to overheat, but if your girls catch a chill, they're stuck. That's about as far as I'd take it, though.

[WindyCityMom]

Unless you have some strict rules about modesty (which I take no issue with) I'd let them be. Since they're not small children, I'd trust that they'd put more clothes on if they got cold.

[nextcommercial]

Ya..I wouldn't worry about it either. Eventually they will learn to dress for the weather. If it begins to interfere with everyone else, I'd draw the line. I don't care what someone does if it only makes them uncomfortable... but, if the rest of us have to leave early, or turn the air down or up, then they need to live like the rest of us.

[Smithie]

As long as the areas related to reproduction and lactation are obscured from view, we have no rules for how to dress around the house. And really, we wouldn't even have that rule if we didn't live in a suburb where people are constantly passing by the front window, knocking on the door, peering over the back fence etc.

[lookatreestar]

another one who made similar fashion choices as a teen. i was the one with a jacket in the middle of summer- it was more of a security blanket than being "cool" though

[lilyka]

So long as my kids were being modest I wouldn't care what they wear so long as they were able to adjust to the temp and did not whine. So for the boy I would insist he wear a pair of shorts under his jeans or a t shirt under his sweat shirt in case he wanted to take the heavy stuff off (hey, they are baggy. there is room). For my dd I would insist they have a hat and coat and whatever with them in case they got cold. My kids whine when I tell them to grab a coat but usually when I say "you just have to have one you don;t have to wear it unless you want to" they are ok with it.

[Lisa1970]

I have always maintained standards for how to dress from the beginning. Short shorts have never been allowed and my daughter has not cared for them. She did get a pair as a gift. She wore them around the house saying they were comfy. Fine. But she did not leave the house in them. I think she asked at one point and I said no. No issues with my boys.

You can put limits on what they can and cannot wear. I would do it too. I would not be concerned about the overdressed boy (assuming by baggy pants, you do not mean his toosh is showing). But the underdressed girls, I would make a minimum length of clothing requirement for when they leave the house. Inside the house with no company, I just don't care what my children wear.

[eepster]

Definition of a sweater: something you put on when you mother is cold.

I suspect that the bigger a fuss you make, the more they will do it.  There is nothing more fun than driving your mother batty.

[SnowSparrow]

They're teenagers, not invalids or insensate. If they're too hot/cold, they'll wear what is appropriate for their bodies. The only time they will deny themselves that is if you make a big deal about it, in which case they'll suffer just to prove that you don't have control over them. Give up the control, they'll eventually realize it isn't an issue any more and will simply dress to what they need.

They may well just have different needs. My 15y/o son hates heat of any kind, loves cold. I have no idea why, we don't live in a hot climate and the kid doesn't have an ounce of fat on him, but he hates heat. He keeps his windows open in the winter until either the snow piles up outside his window, or there's really high winds. He wanders around in a thin long-sleeve shirt and cords in the dead of winter, which is not exactly California winters up here! The rest of us are in layers and heavy coats and still shiver, but he's perfectly fine. He's been this way since he was a toddler, and I've just learned to accept it and accept that he knows his own body best, and will dress according to his needs.

[csekywithlove]

I have a tendency to always want more clothes around and "overdress." As a teen I layered clothes a lot. Tank tops with cardigans over and a winter jacket... As for under dressing, I was never one of those whole felt completely comfortable with her body. As long as they are only dressing this way at home, I wouldn't worry too much about it. But if friends came over, I would insist on my clothes. And I personally always wear underwear and feel weird without them. Eh.  

As long as they are having snow ball fights in shorts and tank tops and risking their health, let'em be.