Dr. said that Co-Sleeping is 25x less safe

[AmandaBreanne]

Just got home from my daughter's 6 month appointment. The doctor told me that co-sleeping is 25 times more likely to cause infant death. I have not found any research that supports this! The only research I have found presents quite the opposite in statistics...
Can one share some studies of this either way. I just want to know where the stats came from.
I have been sleep sharing with my baby since she was about one month old. And we have slept better since! I just want to do what is best for my baby!

Thanks!!!!

[oaktreemama]

I have to assume he is making that up frankly.

[Thyme Mama]

nak so please excuse the choppiness of my reply

doctors are there for when something is sick or broken

they are NOT parenting experts, nutrition experts etc

also, most doctors are not "up" on current research. they stick with the statistics and research they learned in med school.

there is no info to support his claim because it's not true! of course you are getting better sleep, most mamas do sleep better when they sleep with their babies. also, the human race would have died out loooong ago if his claim were true. whole cultures sleep with their babies still. our western style of putting babies in cribs is actually a dangerous practice, and unheard of in most cultures. SID rates are WAY higher for babies who sleep in cribs.

i say this gently and with best intentions: in the future please do not consult your doctor with questions that pertain to your parenting style! sleep, how you feed your baby, discipline etc is your realm! read some books or surf the internet, just like you're doing now. get feedback from real moms and attachment parenting books. one doctor's OPINION on how you should parent your own child should be a thing of the past.

listen to what your heart and instincts are telling you - and you will certainly be doing the best for your baby!

[Thyme Mama]

little one is asleep now!

i know you asked for some links, but i'm not on my own comp right now. i'll try and post some when i get back to it.

in the meantime, i just want to offer this anecdote: doctors have a long and strong history of twisting and making up facts/stories to scare their patients into doing what the doctor wants, whether it's their own opinion, or something that may be supported by the medical community, but is not evidence based.

here is just one example i personally have had (i have many, many more, but this one really sticks out in my mind):

a few years ago i took 3 yo dd to er for a tick bite (we live in the mountains). er doctor started in on my dd being unvaxxed. completely unprofessional. he said that i had no clue what i was dealing with and that he had watched someone DIE of polio.

i said, "that is really terrible. how long have you been practicing?"

"about 25 years." he answered.

"so in 25 years you have only seen 1 person die of a vaccine preventable disease. and in that time how many people have you watched die of cancer, a car accident, a gun/knife fight wound?"

he was speechless and sputtering. because his scare tactic did not work. i didn't fall for his manipulation.

i ended up talking to the hospital administrator about his unprofessional behavior and she way BEYOND upset.

my point is that we just have to be on guard when dealing with the medical profession. they are really good at sounding authoritative when throwing statistics out there.

one good line of defense is to ask to see the research they have. do they have a paper on the subject with reputable resources to back up their claim? if asked in a matter of fact way, a good doctor will be able to provide this. a doctor who is using a scare tactic will become defensive or will not have any documentation to back their claim up.

[smeep]

I'm sorry but the first thing I did upon reading the title of this thread was laugh. Many people believe cosleeping to be unsafe (when, in fact, proper cosleeping is safer than not cosleeping), that's not new...but the 25 times less safe thing? My first thought is that he just made up a number. I have yet to read a study (reliable or not) that concludes cosleeping is unsafe with that number. I think he's just pulling stuff out of his behind.

[Pirogi]

I would ask him for his source for that information.

[marinak1977]

Unless you have a habit of going to be drunk, co-sleeping is safer than a crib. It is actually proven to regulate infant breathing and prevent SIDS. I'd consult Dr. Sears parenting book, and James' McKenna's book (sorry no links).

[emptytank2000]

I have to agree with them! Most co-sleeping deaths occur when one of the parents is drunk, high on drugs, or both. My husband is the heaviest sleeper in the world, but when our dd was in bed with us, he never moved a muscle. She slept with us from the time she was a month old, and she's now 7. She still crawls in when she has a nightmare, etc. The only reason I don't co-sleep with our twins- there simply isn't enough room in our bed. You know your baby and what works best for the both of you. Don't let your dr scare you into something that you don't agree with.

[AislinCarys]

This is a big recent study from the UK:

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/1...ubmed_RVDocSum

A lot of debate followed it's publication, and the authors went out and declared that the outcome of their study is that co-sleeping is perfectly safe, as long as parents aren't drunk or drugged, or sleeping on a sofa. A breastfed baby is actually at much higher risk if sleeping in a cot, and fed during the night on the sofa or in a bed not prepared for a baby (thick duvets and pillows around head for example).

[sgmom]

Room sharing is a form of co-sleeping. I wonder if that's included in his statistics. 

We (America/Canada) are the only country in the world who practices the use of cribs in separate rooms. The majority of the rest of the world room or bed share. In Asia, it's unheard of to put your child in a separate sleeping area, and most babies sleep right along side of their mothers. Yet SIDS is so rare, that it actually does not have a name. Granted, other effects come into play as well (diet, enviromment, etc), but that pretty much debunks your doctors theory. 

My reply to him would have been "Exactly 25%! Wow. That's a pretty even number!" I definitely agree that sounds made up. 

Edited to add: Remember that in the USA, the drug/alcohol rate is high, as is the use of crib use. My guess would be that at least a portion of SIDS are caused by parents who do drink or do drugs, and would rather spend the money on that than on a crib. Or accidentally falling asleep on the couch (while intoxicated). But that's just my assumption based on what we see on the news. That's a scary place! 

[dakotablue]

I wanted to add that not all SIDS are drug and alcohol, there is also a risk with parents suffering from exhaustion and also a danger of smokers (having to do with air the mother breaths out.

I wouldn't be surprised if your ped also pushed vaxes and early weaning. I'd be cautious.

[happysmileylady]

25x less safe.......than what?  Sleeping in a crib alone in a seperate room?  Sleeping in a crib in the same room?  Sleeping on the floor?  Not sleeping?

There are a LOT of factors when considering the safety of co sleeping.  Not just the normally thrown around ones like drugs and alcohol.  Someone mentioned exhaustion, smoking, and location and bed safety (blankets etc.)  Those are factors too but also, the weight of the parents, medical conditions like sleep apnea, medications that most people don't think of when they thing of "drugs" (most people think of parents getting high, but forget to consider if a parent has to take a vicoden because of a root canal).

Then there's varying definitions.  Co sleeping might mean bedsharing to some, it might mean partial bedsharing to others.  It might mean simply roomsharing to some.  And cause of death...when a child is sleeping in a crib alone, it can be hard to determine cause of death.  What may be ruled as SIDS might actually be that the child was smothered by a bumper.  And then some places might be automatically ruling a death of an infant who is bedsharing as a smothering, but it may very well be SIDS.  And some studies might consider those differently.

Because of all of that, it's very difficult to get a clear study or statistic.  His statistic may very well be "valid" but without the actual study he's getting it from, without knowing where the number comes from, it's useless.  It's like saying riding in a car is 25x safer.  Safer than driving the car?  Safer than riding in an SUV?  Safer than walking? 

Bedsharing is NOT 100% safe.  NOTHING we do as parents is.  Our job is to gather the information we can and make the best decision from that information and to develop our own level of acceptable risk.  Read all the information you can studying co sleeping and make your own determination as to whether or not it's safe for your family.  What may be safe for you, may not be safe for others, and vice versa. 

[mollyschmidt]

I don't think its possible to convince someone otherwise when they are so invested in their beliefs, but this article has convinced me SCIENTIFICALLY that bedsharing is the best for my family.

http://www.nd.edu/~jmckenn1/lab/articles/McKenna_why%20babies%20should%20n.pdf

BTW: I'm height weight proportionate, non-smoker, exclusively breastfeeding....so the risks (to me) are so low, benefits are high!

[Juvysen]

Originally Posted by mollyschmidt 

I don't think its possible to convince someone otherwise when they are so invested in their beliefs, but this article has convinced me SCIENTIFICALLY that bedsharing is the best for my family.

http://www.nd.edu/~jmckenn1/lab/articles/McKenna_why%20babies%20should%20n.pdf

BTW: I'm height weight proportionate, non-smoker, exclusively breastfeeding....so the risks (to me) are so low, benefits are high!

Yes, that was a wonderful article!  I was going to post it, too.

[NewSolarMomma]

My ped talked to me about safe cosleeping, after I told her my new baby was in our bed with us (she asked). I CAN see how it could be dangerous, but we have a HUGE bed and a safe set up, so she thought this was OK. I didn't tell her one of our ferrets sleep with us too, that might have been too much, but they were great training for cosleeping! They aren't like cats (we have those too), they don't move if you lay on them, so you learn not to do this if you want them around unhurt. We do keep the cats and dog away from where baby sleeps, even though all our pets totally ignore the baby.( No, ferrets aren't dangerous, that's a media myth, like many others).

[NewSolarMomma]

Here's a doc that includes a good breakdown of how babies died of cosleeping. It shows that there are certain dangers, but they can be avoided. If done correctly, it can be safe. Even my ped agrees and she is mainstream.

http://www.cpsc.gov/cpscpub/prerel/prhtml99/99175.html

hope this helps!

[tsfairy]

That doc is making stuff up to suit his needs.

Originally Posted by Thyme Mama 

little one is asleep now!

i know you asked for some links, but i'm not on my own comp right now. i'll try and post some when i get back to it.

in the meantime, i just want to offer this anecdote: doctors have a long and strong history of twisting and making up facts/stories to scare their patients into doing what the doctor wants, whether it's their own opinion, or something that may be supported by the medical community, but is not evidence based.

here is just one example i personally have had (i have many, many more, but this one really sticks out in my mind):

a few years ago i took 3 yo dd to er for a tick bite (we live in the mountains). er doctor started in on my dd being unvaxxed. completely unprofessional. he said that i had no clue what i was dealing with and that he had watched someone DIE of polio.

i said, "that is really terrible. how long have you been practicing?"

"about 25 years." he answered.

"so in 25 years you have only seen 1 person die of a vaccine preventable disease. and in that time how many people have you watched die of cancer, a car accident, a gun/knife fight wound?"

he was speechless and sputtering. because his scare tactic did not work. i didn't fall for his manipulation.

i ended up talking to the hospital administrator about his unprofessional behavior and she way BEYOND upset.

my point is that we just have to be on guard when dealing with the medical profession. they are really good at sounding authoritative when throwing statistics out there.

one good line of defense is to ask to see the research they have. do they have a paper on the subject with reputable resources to back up their claim? if asked in a matter of fact way, a good doctor will be able to provide this. a doctor who is using a scare tactic will become defensive or will not have any documentation to back their claim up.

I once asked a dentist for his self-proclaimed research on the topic of nursing past 12months (and how awful he insisted it was,) and was promptly escorted out of his office. The UAV was so upset that someone was questioning his "authority" on the subject, that he couldn't even continue the conversation.

[SelenaJean]

Our pedi is actually very supportive of co sleeping/bed sharing.  She asked me point blank where the baby slept so I told her and was pleasantly surprised at how happy she was about it.  She talked about how cribs were a new fangled un natural invention and that humans have slept with their babies for thousands of years.  She also mentioned how they are only little for such a short period of time and how wonderful it is the have them close to you.  She's from India where it's normal for ppl to sleep together with their babies/children and is on board with almost everything I do(tandem nursing, homebirth etc.)  Would you want to switch drs if possible?  After having un supportive providers in the past and now having one on the same page as me, I can't imagine sticking with the un supportive one.  I also found some great links to acticles on cosleeping by Dr. Sears....

http://www.askdrsears.com/html/10/t102200.asp 

http://www.askdrsears.com/html/7/T071000.asp 

[AmandaBreanne]

I love this! Can I have your doctor?!   

Quote:

Originally Posted by SelenaJean 

Our pedi is actually very supportive of co sleeping/bed sharing.  She asked me point blank where the baby slept so I told her and was pleasantly surprised at how happy she was about it.  She talked about how cribs were a new fangled un natural invention and that humans have slept with their babies for thousands of years.  She also mentioned how they are only little for such a short period of time and how wonderful it is the have them close to you.  She's from India where it's normal for ppl to sleep together with their babies/children and is on board with almost everything I do(tandem nursing, homebirth etc.)  Would you want to switch drs if possible?  After having un supportive providers in the past and now having one on the same page as me, I can't imagine sticking with the un supportive one.  I also found some great links to acticles on cosleeping by Dr. Sears....

http://www.askdrsears.com/html/10/t102200.asp 

http://www.askdrsears.com/html/7/T071000.asp 

[AmandaBreanne]

You are right! The pediatrician did exactly that.... pushed vaccines.  To that he said, "It's your choice to make a bad decision."  

Ugh! Why must he do this to me... We are getting a new pediatrician before my dd's 12month appointment.  

When I met with his NP for some lactation advice (which was not helpful AT ALL) she felt it necessary to tell me that "Co-Sleeping kills babies!"

I was only asking for direction since I was choosing to share my bed with my child!  Like someone else said, the medical field, while they may not make the personal parenting decision to co-sleep, they should offer support to make it the safest sleeping situation possible.

Originally Posted by dakotablue 

I wanted to add that not all SIDS are drug and alcohol, there is also a risk with parents suffering from exhaustion and also a danger of smokers (having to do with air the mother breaths out.

I wouldn't be surprised if your ped also pushed vaxes and early weaning. I'd be cautious.