Originally Posted by SpottedFoxx
Oh boy - I feel that. I'm sorry people can't just be happy for you. Congrats on the new addition. Let me just warn you about your new child.... she's going to steal your heart like no one has, you are going to be amazed at your capacity for love, you are going to have to suffer the joy of seeing the world through the eyes of a child, you are going to cry like you've never cried before when you see your child asleep, safe in their bed, and you'll celebrate the most ridiculous milestones (like writing their name for the first time). Sorry I had to be the one to warn you but I felt it was my duty - as one adoptive mother to another
I LOVE this!!!! I could use more of these warnings! :)
Originally Posted by Lisa1970
I get it completely. My husband was adopted and he was often told how lucky he was that he was adopted and how grateful he needs to be to his parents---because he was adopted! This always destroys his self esteem. I have known people who have been birth parents, adoptive parents, and adopted children. I would love to be an adoptive parent some day. And I know this makes ME the lucky one. And I would correct anyone who says otherwise. I am very very grateful to get to be mom to the children I have.
Congratulations on your daughter!!
I hope I can respond in a way that helps my kids retain their self-esteem... I worry that the same thing as happened to your hubby will happen to them. Ugh. People don't realize what their words are doing.
Originally Posted by Masel
I want to mention something that helped me. I realized eventually that all those tales of attachment difficulties and disrupted adoptions were the social equivalent of pregnancy horror stories. Maybe I wasn't so different after all.
That's exactly what they are! I used to get so annoyed at the pgcy horror stories too! Sometimes it just gets so ridiculous I have to laugh. Like the post office employee who felt the need to tell us all about how his sister-in-law's mother's uncle's cousin's goldfish's owner (ok, slight exaggeration, hehe) adopted internationally and was forced to pay a bunch of bribes and never did get the kiddo home (not exaggerating at all!). I got home and chose to laugh hysterically rather than burst into tears!!!
Ok, for those who asked about our little girl, I can tell you a little without violating the confidentiality stuff, I think. She's about 2.5 and is in an orphanage in Ethiopia. I have some pics of her and she is absolutely as cute as can be! She is reported to be friendly and a bit stubborn. Except for her one disability she is developmentally on target.
I am SO excited to bring her home! We're nearly done with our dossier and then will be able to be "officially matched." Then it's the nailbiting wait time while the red tape gets cleared. Then we travel once to go to court, then we travel again two months later to bring her home! :)
Please no comments on international adoption... start a different thread. I know some people have opinions on it and that's great, just please not here...