A few issues: To start, my almost 3 year old daughter is sensetive in general, is pretty independent but also has spent a lot of time on mama from the beginning. Despite recent divorce and lots of financial stresses, she's pretty well put together. As a mom, i've usually got it pretty well together too (i think). The following issues are the ones where i loose it. And i can't believe i loose it. I haven't lost it with her before the past month and i have now yelled at her and been rough with her when moving her. i can't stand this and want to do it differently. Any suggestions for following issues?
OK. It's taken a long time to get her going to bed at a regular time. (also, she's a co-sleeper and day nurser - well nurses to sleep and upon waking and during the day). It's been even harder to get to night weaning. Anyway, sometimes she decides she's not tired and instead of just telling me that she starts hitting me. The more i try to hold the limit of "it's bedtime. If you're not sleepy, you may lay quietly, or play in bed quietly", the more she tries to hurt me. And, she thinks it's funny!!! Really pushes my buttons. When this happens, i've tried leaving the room - then she follows me and continues the behavior. I've even gone to the front yard 2 different times to try to calm down (just for 1 minute). This is normally when i loose it. I've also tried gently restraining her hands from hitting me (just for about 1 minute, and mostly she thinks it's funny too). I don't like doing that and i think it only gives her the message that trying to control others physically is acceptable. I now think i should just tell her that if she isn't tired she can tell me and we'll get up to quietly play until she's sleepy, but i'm worried that she'll want to do that every night and that i'm then not creating enouch structrue and routine around bedtime. I certainly don't want her bedtime problems getting worse and i also don't want to make her feel that she controls everything and is overly powerful, or controling the family.
Please give any suggestions possible. Also, part of the issue is that I need sleep. I'm a newly single, part time working, very dedicated attachement parenting mama. I've heard of sleeping and letting kids wander around in the house until they're sleepy, but 1) she'll usually hit me, stick her finger up my nose, pull my hair so that i can't sleep and "we can play together", and 2) if she did go on her own, especially when she's in this mischeivious mood, she may not safe in the house alone. She is able to get into everything - moving the chairs around and climbing on the counters to get whatever she wants. Etc. HELP please?
Oh, and normally, she's wonderful, fun, smart, funny, so so loving and kind. And also, do you all think that this behavior is normal for a child her age? It's seems pretty aggressive and worries me a bit.
Seacat
OK. It's taken a long time to get her going to bed at a regular time. (also, she's a co-sleeper and day nurser - well nurses to sleep and upon waking and during the day). It's been even harder to get to night weaning. Anyway, sometimes she decides she's not tired and instead of just telling me that she starts hitting me. The more i try to hold the limit of "it's bedtime. If you're not sleepy, you may lay quietly, or play in bed quietly", the more she tries to hurt me. And, she thinks it's funny!!! Really pushes my buttons. When this happens, i've tried leaving the room - then she follows me and continues the behavior. I've even gone to the front yard 2 different times to try to calm down (just for 1 minute). This is normally when i loose it. I've also tried gently restraining her hands from hitting me (just for about 1 minute, and mostly she thinks it's funny too). I don't like doing that and i think it only gives her the message that trying to control others physically is acceptable. I now think i should just tell her that if she isn't tired she can tell me and we'll get up to quietly play until she's sleepy, but i'm worried that she'll want to do that every night and that i'm then not creating enouch structrue and routine around bedtime. I certainly don't want her bedtime problems getting worse and i also don't want to make her feel that she controls everything and is overly powerful, or controling the family.
Please give any suggestions possible. Also, part of the issue is that I need sleep. I'm a newly single, part time working, very dedicated attachement parenting mama. I've heard of sleeping and letting kids wander around in the house until they're sleepy, but 1) she'll usually hit me, stick her finger up my nose, pull my hair so that i can't sleep and "we can play together", and 2) if she did go on her own, especially when she's in this mischeivious mood, she may not safe in the house alone. She is able to get into everything - moving the chairs around and climbing on the counters to get whatever she wants. Etc. HELP please?
Oh, and normally, she's wonderful, fun, smart, funny, so so loving and kind. And also, do you all think that this behavior is normal for a child her age? It's seems pretty aggressive and worries me a bit.
Seacat
So I am looking to the answers you'll get too.
