Just wanted to quickly say I LOVE DS'S THERAPIST! I talked to her last week about what happened with ex and the feeding stuff. She said she would write a letter for me to use in court if I needed. I just got it today and she did fantastic! (this is ds's feeding therapist, btw) She made it clear that there are not only nutritional problems that go with not feeding, but social and emotional problems that go along with promising a kid food and then refusing to feed them. Hopefully ex will just sign over his rights and leave forever, but if not then I have this letter to further back us up in court
I will say that I'm getting a little nervous about ex. He's been pressing ds for more and more info every time he talks to him. This last call (Sunday) he was trying to get ds to tell him when, exactly, he'll be in Michigan and when, exactly, dp and I will be gone. I think he thought originally that ds was already at my dads house because he started the call with asking ds if he was in Michigan and "are mama and Jason gone or have they not left yet?". Since he calls on Sunday and Thursday, then today is another call day. Then Sunday is another call day but we'll still be with ds then (we will be in Michigan at that time, but dp and I will still be there). Then he doesn't call again until next Thursday (at which point dp and I will be gone). We get back the following Monday night.
If he even attempts anything stupid I will take his butt back to court so fast, asking for sole custody with him having only unsupervised visits. For one- he hasn't even asked me if he could see ds during the time we're gone. So it isn't an issue of he's wanting ds and I'm refusing. If he attempts to take ds that would look really bad in court since he never even attempted to ask me if he could have ds during this time. For another- if he were to try and take ds I would be sure to bring it up in court that he doesn't have any of ds's medication so that would be neglect on his part (my dad will have the medication, obviously). Since ds is on daily meds at this point, that would be considered hugely neglectful if ex were to try and take ds without his meds (some of his meds are life saving- like his inhaler and epi-pen- though his daily meds are not life threatening if he misses them, they will just make ds absolutely miserable).
But I don't see any way he could get ds right now. The way our court order is worded he needs my permission to take ds. I have a notarized letter stating he does not have my permission to take ds and that ds is to remain in my dad's care the entire time I am gone. I have the notarized copy of the court order also for my dad. My lawyer also said to have my dad call her if he needs anything while I'm gone.
But I honestly can't see ex going through all the trouble of getting a carseat for ds, getting clothes, food, etc. That's way too much work for him.