Please tell me I'm not the only one

[Wild Lupine]

whose kids act much worse when house guests are over?

who become completely unable to entertain themselves for the merest fraction of a second while someone is visiting?

who don't respond to redirecting (that normally works like a charm) when someone outside the family is watching?

who suddenly feel the need to describe exactly, and in great detail, what they did on their last trip to the potty?

who seem to have a sixth sense for who is against GD, and then run around the house screaming and throwing things- which they have never done before- when those non-GD people are nearby, as if to say, 'yes, you're right, this is what GD produces; just wait until I'm a teenager'?

And then return to their happy, quiet, helpful selves the moment the visitor leaves?

Please no advice, just support. It's been a tough morning!

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Insert head-banging smiley here

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[nicolian]

((hugs)) That must be very frustrating, especially if someone who does not support or share your parenting beliefs is watching.

[texmati]

My son is not old enough for discipline, but had a 6th sense about when anyone was over from the time he was a few weeks old.

He would start screaming when a car pulled up in the front, and stop only when the door had shut and they left. I have no idea how he knew.

[Logan]

My son started doing this nearly 2 years ago, whenever Im on the phone and whenever we are in the company of anyone. I didnt mind at first as he was little and I figured it was a phase of wanting mommy's attention. I pretty much stopped bothering with phone calls way back then. But he has only gotten worse and more skilled. He destroys the house, does naughty and nasty things he would never do and is purposefully dangerous- like running out on to the road with a willful smile! Things he would NEVER EVER do in a million years when it is just us. I know he does it out of excitement and love for our guests as well as knowing that my attention is divided. But I have no idea what he thinks it will achieve. It only alienates the people he wants to visit and since he is always like this the second they arrive til the second they leave they must all think he is a horror child and I know they think its because of my parenting choices. But they dont get to see what a beautiful person he truly is when he is being himself. I just wish he would stop it and am becoming resentful as I can no longer speak to people on the phone and his behavior makes conversations in person impossible. But nothing stops him when he is like this, its like something switches in his brain and he is just on a rampage. No advice, I am struggling with the same thing. With no sign of it changing anytime soon....

[averlee]

Yep, mine is another one who comes down with a case of the crazies in the presence of house guests. 

[The4OfUs]

We call it "showing off".  You're totally not alone.  My kids do stuff in front of their grandparents and friends that they never do when it's just us at home.

[MamieCole]

OMG my oldest DS does this every. single. time. someone. is. over.

It is SO frustrating, especially because his natural temperament and behavior is so calm and sweet. We have a guest over and I swear he turns into a different person. 

It is especially frustrating when DH's mom or dad is over. DS will ignore them, or say he doesn't like them, refuse to do anything requested, won't eat his food, on and on. Until they get ready to leave and walk out the front door. Then he follows, stands on the front steps, watches them walk towards the car and then yells out in a sweet little 4 year old voice with a smile, "Bye Bye Grandma! I love you! Make sure to put on your seatbelt! Come back soon! See you next time!" And then blows kisses and waves. 

[ReginaPhalange]

Yep, yep, and yep. I can't even begin to imagine what people think of DS1. He has a speech delay, which only exacerbates the issue (and of course you can see on everyone's faces that they think we're in denial and it's something more serious). We had a baby last year and every time the midwives came over he dissolved into inconsolable hysterics. Once or twice, inexplicably, he was fine, the rest of the time he had to be taken outside.  We could see the worry on their faces thinking that the birth was going to be fuuuuuuuun with him acting like that. Fortunately the birth was one of those random times he was fine.

Same with the baby shower. For three hours my DP sat outside with him and missed the whole shower and even at that the shower was punctuated with his hysterical screaming. We had a friend who is a mother of four come and stay with us (by herself) and by the time she left her eyes were like saucers, and she, too, does GD. DS1 has effectively remedied another couple we know of ever wanting children.

And it's not only houseguests, but us visiting other people, too.

When it's just us, though, DS is usually a honey. He has bad patches, but on the whole he is a sweet affectionate child.

Go figure.

[pink gal]

You are so totally not alone.  My 6 yo DD gets so squirrley when we have company over.  She is like a completely different kid.  She doesn't really act naughty, but just really wierd.  We just try to have stuff for her to do as much as possible and are thankful that most of our friends are really kid-friendly and understanding.

[mom2happy]

This is their specialty.

They dont mean to make us look like jerks. They can't help it sometimes (kind of like when puppies pee when they are excited).

[SilverFish]

hahah, so this was why my normally adorable niece was acting like a total basket case when her family was over a couple weeks ago? we live kind of far from them, so we only see the kids every few months, but she has always been a very sweet and well-behaved baby. i guess it has something to do with now being three? but seriously, you could tell from the looks on her parents' faces that they were completely bemused and mortified. she was abusing my cat, destroying the christmas tree, stomping all over the little babies, and generally being a pill, all with a big smile on her face. i know her parents are pretty GD too... too funny... at least i have a warning now for when it happens to me?