3 Year Old Son Extremely Emotional

[Sunflower223]

My DS was the easiest child I had ever had contact with in my life until about 6 months ago.  He turned 3 in May.  Now anything and everything just sets him off.  The slightest little incident will have him hysterical in seconds.  I mean if one of the other kids takes something from him, if my dd says something mean to him, if I ask him not to do anything, if he doesn't get his way, if I try to change his clothes after he has peed on himself.  Just about everything you could imagine sends him into full meltdown and it goes on day in and day out allll day long every day.

DD through tantrums, though she was a bit younger than him when she went through the phase.  She would shriek and lie in the floor and kick, the whole standard tantrum scenario and it wasn't nearly as frequently.  DS makes a high pitch whine and then bursts into tears and there is no consoling him. 

He had to have his iron level checked at the doctor the other day, he made not a sound when she stuck the needle in.  Then when he saw the blood, he went to touch it (I really don't see what the big deal is he was just being a curious kid, it was his blood- but that is another post) the nurse said sort of quickly but not necessarily with hostility, "No, no don't touch that" and took his hand away. He was literally wailing for the next 45 minutes.  Nurses kept coming into the waiting room trying to console him.  He wouldn't speak, he wouldn't respond.  Tears, loud wailing crying-- 45 straight minutes.  Nothing anyone did made him relax. 

He is in the other room playing with his sister and has gone through three short wailing/crying while I have been typing this.

I would love if it someone could tell me this is normal.  However, I know it probably isn't.  It is making me worry and my husband insane so I really need some advice, or reassurance that it is going to pass. 

[lovesea]

He sounds a bit like my ds. From 2 and a half until he turned 4 he used to react very strongly to what seemed to me to be the slightest annoyance. Try to be patient. It will pass. I don't really have any advice but I wanted to share some knowledge. I started to feel better about my ds when I read an article about innate temperament traits. I can't remember where I read it now but basically the article said that traits such as sociability and reactivity are part of the child's innate make up. So whether a child reacts in an easy-going manner to something they don't want or has a huge (what seems to us) over-reaction are influenced by his or her temperament. Your son probably has a high level of reactivity, coupled with the fact that he's in a tough place developmentally. The way this knowledge was a turning point for me was because I stopped trying to work out why he was getting so upset. I accepted that that was just part of who he is. The article said that although you can't change your child's temperament, how the child is parented can effect his or her well-being. So if I remember rightly a child who is shy and has a high level of reactivity may be prone to be anxious. Some of the keys to helping the child were a warm, supportive parent-child relationship, and having clear boundaries

[swd12422]

No advice, but I sure hope it's normal! It doesn't sound like anything outside the realm of normal toddlerhood, in my limited experience/reading here.

We're about to turn 3 here, and boy is it coming out! We are starting to have little episodes like you're describing, although they're not lasting 45 minutes (yet -- he's still in training, though!). I think this is how we're supposed to practice staying calm so we can deal with the teenage years without blowing a gasket!

[Sunflower223]

Thanks ladies. I am hoping it is a phase that will pass, I am glad to see I'm not the only one who has experienced this.

=)