Mostly I just change my rules. DS loves to jump on the couch. I don't mind if he jumps on the bed, but he always comes precariously close to falling off the couch. But after a million times of telling him no, removing him, etc., I finally realized, what's the worst that will happen? He's not likely to get seriously injured falling from less than 2 feet. And he actually hasn't ever fallen off so he's probably being more cautious than I realize. He also likes to plug things in & unplug them... so I showed him how to do it carefully, so his fingers don't touch the metal prongs. Honestly most of the things he does that make me cringe & want to say "no" really aren't that horrible when I think about it. So I guess I've become very lax, as few limits as possible, but if something is being used in a truly dangerous way & he's not responding, the item is taken away or he is removed from the situation & distracted with something fun.
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Something like the highchair, if that was happening during a regular meal (vs. an occasional dinner out or something), I would just end the meal if she wouldn't stay seated. Or if it's happening before she's even started eating, I would let her use a regular chair or a booster seat or sit at a toddler-sized table & see if that helped.
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We also do a lot of redirecting -- "We don't use the (toy) hammer on the dog, but you can hammer the floor," or "We're not going to play with the laptop right now, but you can close the cover & help me put it away." I can't think of other examples right now because I'm dead tired but there was another thread on this issue a day or two ago, here it is http://www.mothering.com/community/forum/thread/1278555/23-mo-old-ignoring-or-doing-the-opposite
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