EDD2 has sensitive skin, and gets raging rashes very quickly if she poops in a diaper and sits there for any amount of time. Once my husband had her and didn't change her for two hours, or check her. She had open sores. :( He was just clueless.
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For her, the only thing that works is naked time. I do wash a lot of bedding, and she sleeps on the waterproof cover and I cover pee spots at night with lap pads. Daytime is naked all the time except when out, then I offer her the potty and change her every 30 minutes if not more. She is always dry.
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Wipe with water only (splashing) and pat dry gently with 100% cotton or bamboo cloth. If out and about, try to bring cloth wipes in a thermos of warm water to daub her bottom with, and then put in a ziploc baggy for washing later.
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I'm sorry, it is so painful to watch them like that. I know how it feels! :hug
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ETA: That is when she had rashes at that age. We do lots of nakey-butt time. :blushy We also EC. So that does help in the long-run.