4-Year-Old Boy Doesn't Play

[MamaMakingMemories]

My 4-year-old son very rarely plays with toys. He is smart in some ways--for example, he knew could identify all the letters of the alphabet and tell me what sounds they made by about 18 months, and he is currently reading at about a 2nd grade level. He LOVES words/word games/jokes, and he's very musically-inclined as well, but he doesn't play creatively. He doesn't build things out of blocks. He doesn't make cars go "vroom vroom." He doesn't really use toys at all! He just sits around and looks at books, or listens to music, or wants to play educational computer games (although we severely limit those--maybe once a week). He doesn't like to draw, either, other than just scribbling a bit with crayons, never really attempting to draw anything recognizable.

Should I be worried? Is there anything I can do to help him act more like a kid and less like a little adult?

[lindsayjean]

Play is SO important for kids!!

Does he watch any tv?  I found when my daughter (3.5) used to watch tv she had a harder time playing creatively.  Now we restrict tv to ONLY when she is getting babysat by my mom or grandparents (mainly only then because my family babysits for free and I don't feel like I can really say no).  

Have you tried engaging him in creative play?  Maybe you start the roll playing and do it together for a while until he goes off doing it on his own? 

Other thoughts- my daughter is very into academic things... reading, writing, etc (sounds a lot like your son in that aspect actually) and I had to actively take a HUGE step away from the early academics for her.  It's not like I ever was really pressing her to learn any of it- she just picked it all up and kept asking for more.  I send her to a waldorf preschool 2 mornings a week where the play play PLAY, it's ALL about creative play.  I'll help her with her letters, or whatever she is doing (she LOVES crafts and coloring and painting) if she asks me to, but I try not to actively push any academics.  Now she can sit and play pretend with herself or a friend for hours!  She can still also sit and read books for a long time to, or do her 100-200 piece puzzles, but she also spends LOTS of time playing.  

Could you sign him up for a play based or waldorf preschool?  Or maybe just a once a week class with other kids?  Playgroups?  Maybe seeing other kids playing would help him figure it out?  

[MamaMakingMemories]

Thanks for the ideas, lindsayjean. I guess I don't really play with him very often...usually if I want to spend time with him, I read him a book! I will try to make an effort to play creatively WITH him and not just expect him to know what to do. He doesn't watch TV...occasionally (once or twice a week), I let him watch an educational children's video, such as sign language or Spanish...whatever we happen to have checked out from the library. One day a week he goes to a preschool-type class with kids his age while I go to Bible study, but even that is pretty "academic"--each week is based around a letter, etc. His teacher there says he is often "in his own world."

I like a lot of the Waldorf philosophy, from what I've read of it...I'll look into that more.

Thanks again.

Melissa