how to start potty learning

[Honey693]

After Christmas I want to start potty learning with DD b/c I think she's ready, but I don't want to start before the holidays.  Right now she has a potty, she has books about potty learning, she cahnges her doll's diapers while saying "oh no, uck.  need diaper wipe", she'll ask to sit on her potty (she's only peed in it twice), she's really interested in her sister's diaper changes (she'll say  "baby wet?  baby poop? uck, new diaper") she'll tell me when she's pooped and gets really upset if I don't change her that instant.  This all seems to me like she's ready to at least start.  I'd love to let her just go bare butt for a week and see how that goes, but it won't work here.  We have carpet everywhere except the small kitchen and two of the bathrooms.  I can't keep an eye on her all the time b/c we have a 6 week old.  How on earth do I do this?

[Aliy]

i'd be all over some suggestions too... my son is two and he is definalty showing some readiness signs.

honeslty invest is a spot remover and keep an eye on her as much as possible.. set a timer to take her to the bathroom... put her on the potty when she wakes up... at least that is what we did with my older child.. hope you can find something that works

[sapphire_chan]

Thick undies, fleecy pants, and socks. That'll handle most if not all of the pee, and will catch the poop.

[SnickySnaxx]

Stuck in the same boat w/ DD1 who is 3 tomorrow... Attempting naked time today wish me luck we also have carpet all over :( Am well prepared for scrubbing

[JennaW]

DD isn't fully potty learned yet but what got us off to a good start was taking her right after waking up in the morning or from nap.  I would just have her sit on the potty right when waking up when she pretty much always had to pee.  At first it was totally by coincidence that she went pee in the potty but over time it built the connection and helped move us into her using the potty during other times of the day.  Being naked really helped.  The issue we are dealing with now is using the potty when not naked (have a separate thread of my own for that.)  Good luck! Oh and if there is anything I have learned about potty learning it is that the more you remind, encourage and focus on it, the harder, more frustrating and less successful it becomes.  LOL.

[lexapurple]

I just posted in other thread on the similar topic. What you are doing is great and just keep doing it. She is defenatly ready. I understand that it might be hard to potty learn during holliday rush but if she is ready why not start adding things slowly to what you already do. She will let you know how ready she is during the process. DD was ready by 18m and it took her one day to keep her accident free for most part. So maybe if you start now, she will be ready before Hollidays. And if not you can fall back a bit and do more after.

I have always changed my DD's diapers right away because I personally would not want to wait myself if I mess my pants and would need to wait to be changed. I believe that this helped her make a connection between her bodily functions and unpleasant feelings. Maybe you could make it a priority to keep her clean and dry. I don't mean that you neglect you DD. I mean she already knows that it feels yaki to have dirty pants so keep building on it and treat it as an accident rather than the norm. If she messed her big girl panties you would change her right away, right?. Give her a chance to potty before and after her diaper changes and if she goes make a big deal out of it and if not you did not loose anything, put a diaper back on. If you are not cloth diapering it might be a good time to try it since you can't let her go bare butt. Even cheap Gerber ones from Babyrus would work and pair of rubber pants. It would give her a chance to experience wetness after elimination and should kick her mind to connect two things, without soiling your floors but you would need to be vigilent and change her right away, so she doesn't get used to feeling wet as a norm. When you will be able to be more commited to potty training you could do more. It is my personal opinion but I would not wait two months if she is ready and indicated that she is interested, she might loose it than. I know it is not the norm, but when DD was ready it litteraly took her a day of us putting on the potty to get a hang of it and start asking for it.

[Eresh]

We just started with DS1 recently. We've had little potties and potty books for a long time but we put off actual potty learning until the baby was born. DS1 really hates diaper changes, so I talked to him about how he wouldn't need diaper changes any more if he learned to use the potty. I bought a couple of packs of Elmo and Thomas underwear and showed them to him, calling them "big boy underwear", and asking him if he wanted to start using the potty. So we agreed to start the next morning. After the nighttime diaper came off I put him in underwear and a shirt. We had a couple of accidents which I cleaned up promptly with prefolds and Natures Miracle. We've taken a couple of breaks when he's had a tough day but now he's mostly peeing inhis potty at home. Today he did his first poop -- though that was pretty much because I saw him starting and put him on the potty. I don't usually prompt him to use the potty because he's in a very obstinate phase right now. I have been rewarding him with stickers though, which he loves. Next step is public potties... *shudder*

[June Bug]

We had a similar situation because we are currently living with my parents and they were not cool with our little one having "accidents" all over their carpet. So instead, I just started incorporating the potty into out daily routine. At first we sat on it once or twice a day and in the beginning she only went sometimes.  Then she started to get the hang of it and we increased the amount of times a day she sat on the potty. It just became part of our day, we would sit on it in the morning, before nap, after nap and before bed. I think the consistency helped.  Now she often only has a wet diaper in the morning and after naps. I still sit her on the potty every 1-2 hours depending on how much she has had to drink and what time of day it is. She rarely tells me when she has to go and I think that is in part because she isn't allowed to run diaper free and get to know all her bodily sensations.  I really feel that if she were diaper free for a week or two she would be fully potty trained. But we work with what we have at the moment, right?  I can definitely say it will probably take us longer this way but we are avoiding the stress of dealing with my parents being upset about pee/poop on the rug, which could really give the wrong impression to our daughter about her bodily functions. 

Good Luck!

[faithrainbow]

I've been working with toddlers for the past five years, and I've helped potty-train around 35 kids!  It definitely sounds like your daughter is ready to move it up a step.  My suggestion would be to start taking her to sit on the potty every couple of hours, and once she gets the hang of it and is able to "push" her pee out, start taking her every 45 minutes or so, and soon she'll be able to keep her diaper dry all day (except naptime, probably), and the transition out of diapers will be very smooth.  In my experience, most kids don't start telling you they have to go potty until significantly later. 

I've found that the trick is to have going potty be a special time with me that kids look forward to.  Here's what I do:  I have a stool in the bathroom so I can sit facing a child while she's sitting on the potty.  I sit down and have her pull down her own pants and take off her own diaper, helping her just as much as she needs, and giving lots of smiles, encouragement and eye contact.  Then when she sits down on the potty I sing a little song or nursery rhyme with her, again with joyful eye contact.  Then I say, "Do you think some pee will go into the potty?  Let's listen for it," and I turn my head to the side and cup my ear, listening intently (without eye contact, so she can concentrate on her body).  I'll wait for awhile, perahaps repeating, "Do you think it will come?"  If it does come, I smile as I listen, and when the flow is done I turn to her wonderingly and say in a quiet, happy voice, "I heard it!"  Don't get too excited while it's happening, or she'll clench up and stop the flow.  If no pee comes, I'll say, "No pee this time!  Maybe next time it'll come."  Either way we wash hands together, and I give her a kiss, and we go back to our day.

Some kids enjoy the process so much that they never want to get up off the potty if no pee is coming.  If that happens, I hold up my hand in a fist and say, "When my fingers are all up, then it will be time to get off the potty."  Then I silently watch my hand as I very slowly raise my thumb and each finger in a steady stream.  When the pinky is standing upright, I say, "Ding-ding-ding-ding-ding!" and I swoop them off the potty, laughing and giving them a kiss.  Then they're usually fine getting a new diaper and washing hands.

Hope this is helpful!

[jadedone80]

This is are awesome suggestions.  I don't want to hijack, but what if your LO refuses to go and wants to wear a diaper?  My 2.5yo can go to the potty..she does it at bathtime because if she goes in the bath, then bath is over.  Yet every time I put big girl pants on her or bottomless, she has a fit and says she wants a diaper.  We've CDed from the beginning and her diapers are all velour lined.  Could that be part of the problem?  Any advice to get her to use the potty?

[faithrainbow]

My suggestion (if you're up for it) is to just let the diapers "run out," and make the switch to underpants all the time.  If she asks for a diaper, just tell her that they're all gone.  You may have a rough couple of days, as she tests to see whether the diapers might reappear, but stick it out for five days, and I bet it'll be smooth sailing after that.  If there are some places where she'll still need diapers (daycare, grandma's house), keep them there and put on a special "daycare diaper" once you get there. I'm a big fan of soft pants with no underwear, so it will still catch the pee but they're easy for kids to get up and down by themselves.

As for wanting to stay in a diaper, I see two possibilities.  It could be that she wants to keep that feeling of being a baby for a little bit more.  Does she say that she doesn't want to be a big girl when you try to do her diaperless?  If so, go out of your way to give her lots of cuddling and lap-time, and tell her how she's your special girl, and play games that you used to play when she was a baby.   Another possibility is that she wants to feel like she's in control.  In this case, you could try getting a special doll for her, a doll who wears diapers and may need lots of diaper changes.  You will have to present the doll to her very seriously, and let her know that this baby needs someone who will take care of it and be in charge.  You can show her carefully how to change its diaper and you might suggest periodically, "Oh!  Do you think your baby needs a diaper change?" Then let her know that you're glad her baby has someone like her to take good care of her. Children can often act out with dolls what they are going through themselves.  And of course, since your daughter is two and a half, she may be feeling both of these things, so why not try them both?

Hope this gives you some ideas.  If you want to chat more, let's start a new thread.

[redvlagrl]

We did the 3 day potty training and it worked very well for us. DD was dry day and night in 4 days and poop trained in 8. I highly receommend it, though it is har don the parent! If you have more than one you'll need some help.

[GraceBW]

Hi

Any suggestions for twin girls (2 yrs)??  Their personalities are very different. I think one is more ready and aware than the other.  I have been paying more "potty" attention to the one that appears to be aware. Thoughts??

Thanks

[faithrainbow]

I've helped potty train three sets of twins, and only one set were ready at the same time.  One mom held the one back until both were ready, and the other mom potty trained one and then the other.  The mom who held the child back till they both were ready ended up having trouble with the one who waited; it turned into a power struggle.  Granted, this is just anecdotal evidence, but I've observed quite a few times that if you wait too long after a child is ready, they decide that they prefer diapers, and it turns into a power struggle.  So my suggestion would be to go ahead and potty train the one who is ready.  Her moving out of diapers might inspire the one who isn't interested yet, esp. if you take them both to the potty together.  If it doesn't inspire her, don't make a big deal of it, just wait until she's ready.