s/o - do your kids call nonrelatives aunt/uncle? - Page 2

[Alyantavid]

Originally Posted by mamalisa 

We are big "family is who you make it" people so out kids have two uncles and one aunt that are not related. They are family, better to them than many of their blood relatives and the people they love and count on. They are their uncles and aunt.

That.  We do have one couple who are very very good friends.  They're the only ones my kids call Aunt and Uncle.  I have a "slightly" dysfunctional family so I'm happy to have other adults in my kids' lives that they can be close to and look up to.

[GardenStream]

This... everyone is called by first names.  We don't do Miss Firstname, Aunt Firstname or anything else.  Only Mommy, Daddy, Grandma and Oma are called something other than their first names.

Originally Posted by ollyoxenfree 

No. They don't even call their true biological aunts and uncles "Aunt" or "Uncle". It would be odd to give the title to someone who wasn't related to them. 

[AtYourCervices]

I have 2 honorary uncles from my childhood. They've been best friends with my dad since they were kids. One day my brother was doing a family tree for school and he got a confused look on his face... "Who is Uncle Dave a brother to?" 

Uncle Dave is black. We're European mix/Cherokee. 

I have a few friends who have the title "Aunt" or "Uncle". I am the "Aunt" to a beautiful newborn baby boy. 

My kids don't see their biological aunts and uncles, unfortunately. Mostly it's due to physical distance. I have a biological nephew who lives on the other side of the world (Philippines). 

Right now, I'm debating what to call my future step siblings. My dad is getting married and his future wife has 3 adult children. I think it would be appropriate to refer to them as Aunts and Uncle. However, I haven't met them. Scratch that, I went to middle school with the boy. I don't think we'll refer to them that often, though, so I think it's a non-issue.

[pumpkin]

No. I am more comfortable using aunt and uncle for family. It seems like iter terms could be used to designate special
Friends if people found it necessary. Just my preference.

[TiredX2]

I have 8+ siblings, and DP has two, so they are the kids only aunts and uncles.

We do have one "Auntie" though.  DP's mom's best friend who was always DP's aunt and is super close to the family.  I'm comfortable with that because she is not going ANYWHERE.  She's been in their lives for over 40 years and is just as much family as anyone else (DP is godfather to one of her daughters).

In general, the Aunt & Uncle thing doesn't bother me (when other people use it).  I am comfortable only using it for "actual" family (which can be biological or chosen, but must be PERMANENT.  if you moved half-way around the world for 10 years and then would never see the people again, they're not truly permanent).  My BIL & SIL use the term freely and it bothers me *FOR THEM* because they started fostering my nephew (who is now 10) when he was 7 and I think it really is confusing about the permanence of family.  He's had so many aunts & uncles (and moms and dads :( ) in and out of his  life, I wish they would really emphasize that FAMILY is forever.  DP & I aren't going anywhere.  BIL & SIL aren't going anywhere.  His cousins will always be his cousins.  Having random people be "aunt" and "uncle" to me just introduces more chances for loss in his life :(  But that's their choice.

[ASusan]

Yes, DS has a few honorary aunties and uncles. They are all long-time friends. Their children call us Auntie ASusan and Uncle DH.

It is partly cultural/familial from DH's family and culture.

Anthropologists call it fictive kin. I don't like wikipedia's article on it, but I'm too lazy to search for a better one.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fictive_kinship

[KristyDi]

Dh and I don't have any friends that close, but if we did DD would most likely call them Aunt or Uncle.  She does call other family that aren't technically aunts or uncles by those titles.  For example she calls my adult cousins as well as my aunts and uncles by those titles.  She calls my cousins kids (so her 2nd cousins) her cousin-friends, a title she created herself.

As a child I had several Uncles and Aunts that weren't related to us. We also called my dad's cousin Uncle.

Isn't it a pretty common thing in other cultures to call people Aunt, Uncle, or even Grandmother or Grandfather as a sign of respect?

[onlyzombiecat]

No. We only call family members uncle or aunt.

[hildare]

yes.. our dd has several aunts and uncles who are my and dh's sisters and brothers in our hearts but not our actual blood kin. 

[Mommy2Austin]

Yep :) Close friends are Aunt/Uncle/ Cousins...its more familial than Mr/Ms./Mrs. We did it growing up and its always been a "thing" in our family.

[rachieface]

I grew up calling my parents' friends "aunt" and "uncle" (we lived overseas), and now that I live in the USA my husband and I have chosen to do that with our good friends here.  Most of our close friends are childless at the moment and absolutely LOVE being pseudo aunts and uncles to our babe!  Calling friends by family terms is very common in other cultures, and also in the expatriate community that I grew up in. 

[Turtlecouple]

Yes, we do.

I'm from Hawaii and everybody there is Auntie or Uncle!!

[karanyavel]

Originally Posted by GardenStream 

This... everyone is called by first names.  We don't do Miss Firstname, Aunt Firstname or anything else.  Only Mommy, Daddy, Grandma and Oma are called something other than their first names.

This, pretty much, although my brother goes by "Uncle Firstname". Everyone else except for Mom, Dad, and grandparents are "Firstname" or "Nickname".

--K

[blizzard_babe]

We do, from time to time, refer to a few close family friends as Aunt/Uncle So-and-so, but the only people that DS really KNOWS as Aunt or Uncle are his aunts and uncles. And my husband's batty aunt, who insists on being called aunt despite the fact that she's great-aunt.

[Celtain]

My kids have one honorary "auntie" She is my best friend, my soul sister.  DD2 slipped one day and just called her by her first name, well DS2 was having no part of it, he said, " that's AUNTIE Karen!!!!!!!"  Yeah, that got him extra smoochies! LOL

[MamitaM]

My parents were friends with a couple who I called auntie and uncle,I later ended up living with this couple and they forced me to start calling them mommy and daddy and I was abused by them. So when I became pregnant with my son I wasn't sure what I wanted to do. I'm estranged from my family and they live quite far from me anyway. I'm a single mama and so my son really has no "real" relatives here. I've been allowing him to call one of my good male friends "uncle" b/c he's been in my life for the past 7 years or so. Recently the father of my milk baby referred to me as "auntie" and that was sweet and I liked it. We don't know each other well,but I think a good friendship is starting with this family and I'm hoping our babies will be close someday. I really do only want my son to use the term auntie and uncle for special people in my life who I know will stay. I know that when I start dating again I won't allow him to call anyone I date "uncle",they will be called by their first name.

[lifeguard]

Dh & I always felt that there should be a special word for those people who "we call him uncle but he's really a good friend of the family" so we jokingly call our close friends Fruncle & Fraunt.

But yes, we do this & so do most of our friends.

[lifeguard]

Dh & I always felt that there should be a special word for those people who "we call him uncle but he's really a good friend of the family" so we jokingly call our close friends Fruncle & Fraunt.

But yes, we do this & so do most of our friends.

[SubliminalDarkness]

No. Pretty much everyone is known by their first name, even a couple who is very close and we've debated asking to be guardians to our kids should something happen to DH and I. 

[puffingirl]

Oh, yes!  We have several aunties and uncles for our DD.  She makes no distinction between them and her biological ones and we all consider ourselves very lucky.