Tell me about your 'STTN turned frequent waker'

[HonkyTonka]

My DD STTN at 2 weeks. All by herself, like magic. It was 5 hours, then 6, then 8, and finally 10 (at about 4 weeks). She was sleeping a solid 10 hours at night until about 5 months. Now she wakes every hour after she goes to bed (8pm) until about midnight, then about every 2 hours after that. She sleeps in her crib next to our bed (or at least I prefer that, lately she's been in our bed A LOT with similar waking habits). 

I can't figure out why she is waking up. Reflux, hunger, temperature, teeth, gas... I have no idea. I've tried daytime power nursing, raising one side of the crib, swaddling, white noise, cooler room, warmer room, yadda yadda.

Anyone else have a kid that used to STTN then started this frequent waking shenanigans? If yes, did they ever get back to STTN? Was it something that you did?

[love2mother]

I could have written your post. Exact same thing here. DD is 9 months now, and for her, the sleep regression started around age 6 months, and has been getting worse and worse with each passing month. Seriously, she has woken up more the past few nights (every 2 hours) then she ever did as a newborn. So, sorry, no advice to offer, just wanted you to know that someone else feels your frustration (speaking for myself anyway- it's frustrating!). I will be watching you post to see what the replies are. . .and hopefully there will be some good suggestions and tips to help your baby STTN again. 

[EmilyG]

Sorry, I don't have any advise, as both my kids have always been frequent night wakers, but I have heard that it's pretty normal for babies to wake more often once they start working on new things like sitting, crawling, walking etc.  Teething pain could also be causing more frequent waking?

[Carrie1105]

Ours started around 9 1/2 months.  She'll be a year on the 25th and the only way she STTN is by co-sleeping.  But not always.

I have tried EVERYTHING.  She has slept in our room since day one, but would co-sleep when sick or teething.  I have tried white noise, putting down awake, putting down asleep, hot water bottle, a fleece blanket under her sheet to make it softer, stretched out on top of her sheet to make it even softer, wearing something all day and stretching it across the crib where she lays her head, lights on, lights off and probably a million different things that I can't recall at the moment.  Seriously, I've tried everything I can think of.

She has been working on her molars for 2+ months, so this is the problem, although meds do no help at all.  None have broken through yet, either.  I also think she had separation anxiety (went through it during the day months earlier, but all of the sudden it's a big night problem).  She actually went through a period of about a month of screaming in her car seat.  I only went out for appointments (we have a 45 min. drive each way).  I even eventually asked my MIL to go with me and DD screamed all the way there and back.  I had no idea what was going on.

At this point, we're thinking of scrapping the crib and getting her a twin bed, putting the mattress on the floor with bumpers.  I wouldn't have a big issue to continue co-sleeping (other than she's a bed hog and I really don't get any sleep), but I'm 35 weeks pregnant and she's a high needs baby, using any excuse to wake up.  A crying newborn would be a great excuse.

Hopefully yours doesn't last this long!!

[SeattleRain]

I had the exact same issue and I swear, it's traumatizing. Everyone gives you these very vague answers also when you ask when it will end. We started the sleep regression about a month ago, around 4 months adjusted age (DS was over 2 weeks late). We're now at the point where he eats once per night about 70% of the time and then wakes up for a second time about 30% (oddly he doesn't care to eat at that time). We read Dr. Weissbluth's book Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child and he seems to believe that the key to avoiding crying and nightwaking is to put your baby down between 6-8pm. I would try soothing baby to sleep around the 6-8pm time period. If she wakes up, feed her and attend to her in the dark, just like you would if it was the middle of the night, even if it's only 8pm by that point. Their little bodies just tell them to go to sleep earlier and once they get on that kind of schedule it really seems to sort them out better. I was having a hard time getting my DS to sleep until 7am before I started putting him down at 6:30pm. I had been trying to keep him up because in my mind it would help him get up at a reasonable hour but it was actually working the opposite way.

[P.J.]

DS was a STTNer from day 1....until around 5 months. In the last month (he's 6 months now) he has some nights where he sleeps through, and some where he wakes up once or twice, and some where it's every 40-90 minutes starting at 3 or 4am. I cannot figure out why. He did get two teeth, but only one or two nights was it clearly teething pain. I tend to think it's that his body is so busy with learning to crawl right now, that it simply wakes itself up with all that energy. He also started a new habit of waking up whiny and grumpy (in the morning) whereas he used to wake up happy.

So, no advice other than you're not alone. I think it's pretty normal for sleep to change at this age. In our case, there are still some nights where he sleeps through, but most nights he's up at least once and he is definitely not the every-night STTNer he used to be!

[love2mother]

OP- have you seen any improvement with your LO's sleep or tried anything new that has worked? 

[newmamalizzy]

Again, no real advice (sorry!), but we have had a similar situation twice.  The first time, around 4 months, we were actually able to solve the problem by moving DD from the bed to her crib (in our room), re-starting the swaddle, and, as Seattle Rain said, moving to a 6 - 6:30 bedtime.  DD slept a solid 12 hour night with 1 - 2 feedings for at least a month after we made these changes.  Unfortunately, the night-waking monster struck again around 6 months.  This time we haven't been able to solve the problem, and at 8 months we get up for feedings 3 times per night and I spend much of the rest of the night patting DD's back, holding her, etc.  In our case, we're battling many of the things you mentioned and others:  reflux, teething pain, exzema, post-nasal drip...Sleeping next to DD (she's back in the bed), I can tell that much of the time she's waking due to some sort of discomfort.  That said - I think she got accustomed to being comforted whenever she woke, and now even in the absence of discomfort, she is worse at keeping herself asleep than she used to be.  Whoops.  Best of luck to you.  Go to bed early so you can get some sleep!

[HonkyTonka]

Update:

So we've instituted a more elaborate bedtime routine. It goes something like this: eat, bath, nurse lying down in our dimly lit room, books in her dimly lit room, dancing (1-2 min) to her crib aquarium thing (has lights and bubbles too), turn fan on (white noise), swaddle, pat on belly or rock in rocking chair till drowsy (with music and lights still on), put in crib. I let her fuss around a bit more, which seems to help. Normally I'd pick her up right away and things would escalate. Now I pick her up if her whines turn to cries and rock with her (sometimes have to nurse her in the chair again). It is getting easier and easier to get her to sleep. We also moved her crib into her room, and if she wakes in the night, I wait for 4 minutes. I can hear her whine. Most often she's between sleep cycles and calms down and goes back to bed. If the whining continues or turns to cries, I attend to her in her room. We are trying to have her in bed at 7pm. Any later and it gets harder to get her to sleep. However, since she goes down so early, she's waking up at 5am and not wanting to go back to sleep. Not really sure what to do about that... We also don't let her nap the 2.5 hours before bed,

I think the biggest improvements came from the bedtime routine, the early and strict bedtime, the swaddle, the white noise, and, probably the most important one, not rushing to her every time she made a peep. There was a thread on here or in Life with a babe talking about whining it out which really helped us. 

She can still wake up a few times (3) some nights, but often only twice and sometimes only once. At least we are getting some sleep!

[HonkyTonka]

so it is 10pm and babe is asleep in my arms, has been since 9. Tonight didn't work out so well even though I followed all my "rules".

Darn.

[love2mother]

Originally Posted by HonkyTonka 

Update:

So we've instituted a more elaborate bedtime routine. It goes something like this: eat, bath, nurse lying down in our dimly lit room, books in her dimly lit room, dancing (1-2 min) to her crib aquarium thing (has lights and bubbles too), turn fan on (white noise), swaddle, pat on belly or rock in rocking chair till drowsy (with music and lights still on), put in crib. I let her fuss around a bit more, which seems to help. Normally I'd pick her up right away and things would escalate. Now I pick her up if her whines turn to cries and rock with her (sometimes have to nurse her in the chair again). It is getting easier and easier to get her to sleep. We also moved her crib into her room, and if she wakes in the night, I wait for 4 minutes. I can hear her whine. Most often she's between sleep cycles and calms down and goes back to bed. If the whining continues or turns to cries, I attend to her in her room. We are trying to have her in bed at 7pm. Any later and it gets harder to get her to sleep. However, since she goes down so early, she's waking up at 5am and not wanting to go back to sleep. Not really sure what to do about that... We also don't let her nap the 2.5 hours before bed,

I think the biggest improvements came from the bedtime routine, the early and strict bedtime, the swaddle, the white noise, and, probably the most important one, not rushing to her every time she made a peep. There was a thread on here or in Life with a babe talking about whining it out which really helped us. 

She can still wake up a few times (3) some nights, but often only twice and sometimes only once. At least we are getting some sleep!

Nice to hear you and your LO are making steps in the direction, getting back on track towards STTN once again. I am happy to say the same thing here. I agree- early bedtime is key, as well as having a routine. 

In regards to the  5:00 am waking- I read that one trick is to wait 5 minutes the first morning when you hear babe starting to wake. Let her play or chatter in bed for that time. The net day, add 5 more minutes, the third day, another 5 minutes. . .and so on. The idea is that baby may adjust her wake time based on when she is rising from bed. Don't have any personal experience with this, just something I recall reading. 

Regarding naps- what time is DD's afternoon nap? The issue we are having is that DD isn't ready for the PM nap until 3:00-4:00 pm, and often sleeps past 5:00 pm, making the 7:00 om bedtime a bit of a challenge. It's hard for me to go in and wake a sleeping baby from a peaceful nap! I am a firm believer in the saying "the more they sleep, the more they sleep".

[Ninetales]

My daughter was sleeping ten hour stretches starting at six weeks and was still doing it until a month ago, when she hit 8 months.  Then she started waking at night too.  We co-sleep and until last month I know she would stir in the night, and I'd cuddle her or switch sides to nurse.  She'd nurse quietly through the night and neither of us would fully wake.  Now she wakes up with a full cry four to five times a night and I can't get back to sleep easily.

All eight of her first teeth are in so I'm reasonably sure it's not teething, but she has been pulling up for awhile and I think is close to walking.  So maybe that's it. 

I wish I knew what to do, but I'm in the same boat.

The earlier bedtime idea is interesting to me.  I think I will start trying that and see if it helps.  I've heard if they sleep well at night they will take better naps, and she needs help with that too.

[Unlikely Mama]

I would suggest an even earlier bedtime depending on naps.  You're entering 3-2 nap transition territory at about 6 months and so early wake-ups might become more common.  At 5mo., my DD had a 7pm bedtime but then it moved earlier at about 6mo. because she started refusing the 3rd nap.  Night sleep is more restorative for babies than nap sleep. At that age, I made sure that naps ended by 4pm and then went straight to an EBT (early bedtime).  It is so tempting to keep them up longer, but I found through MUCH trial and error that my baby (now almost 9mo.) got more total sleep with longer stretches when went with the EBT. When DD was going thru the 3-2 transition, which can last weeks, I was regularly putting her down at 5pm.  Her wake ups ranged from 5am-6:30. Now that we are thru the transition, bedtime is moving out again-she is now asleep for the night by 6pm.  Her wake up time is between 6-6:30am.  She still has a couple of night feeds which are thankfully short and to the point.  When I keep her up "late" (e.g.Thanksgiving), she still gets up at the same time in the morning, so at least with an EBT, she is logging some extra ZZZ's.  As she gets a bit older and can handle longer wake times, I'll stretch her bedtime out toward 7-7:30.  GL!

[newmamalizzy]

I agree with Unlikely Mama to aim for something closer to 6 than 7.  It's kind of an inconvenient time to be putting a baby to bed, I know, but for us it works WAY better than putting her to bed even a half-hour later.  The early wake-up (5:30 a.m. over here) is weird, too, but not so bad if you start going to bed by 8 or 9, and even better if you join in on the first nap of the day.  Considering this will probably be at 7 a.m., why the heck not, right? 

Secondly, I think your bedtime routine sounds a little long/complicated, more like an evening pattern.  I think the evening pattern is important, but you should try to really focus in on the last 5 - 10 minutes before bed for the core of your bedtime routine.  Make it memorable and set it in stone so if the rest of the evening gets disrupted you always have this brief, memorable sequence to cue your baby that it's time to sleep, like, diaper change - pull down covers - get in sleep sack - nurse.  Hope things are going better for you!

[HonkyTonka]

Thanks for all the replies.

When does DD nap? Ummmmm. She naps throughout the day. She used to have a reliable nap 2 hours after waking in the morning. The rest of the day was always a mystery as she'd nap (usually every 2 hours) but if she gets disturbed and wakes, nap time is over - even if she only 'slept' for 5 minutes. After one of those there would be about an hour of crying to try and get her to sleep - which she would for maybe 20 minutes.So I gave up forcing the nap on her. Additionally, I like to get out of the house which throws a wrench in the nap routine. All this to say, she doesn't have a nap schedule. I watch the clock and her tired signs to know when she needs a nap. She's almost never napped longer than 1 hour at a time, so she often has many naps a day - sometimes in the car, often on me, and sometimes in her crib.

When she is waking from naps and at night, it is with whines or cries. She never wakes up content. Last night, after I put her back to bed (I was out and DH put her to sleep - then she woke up 45 minutes later and ate, then fussed, then napped on him, then got up, then ate, then fussed until I got home and nursed) she woke up 3 times within an hour and a half. She needed some serious rocking to calm down and fall back asleep. Finally I got fed up and moved into the spare room with her so that DH could sleep and I could have more room with DD and hopefully sleep. I don't love co-sleeping because my limbs fall asleep and my body hurts the next day, but last night was tolerable. When she woke (with crying) I put my hand on her chest to try and calm her. I think that worked once. All other times (prob 5 ?) I had to nurse. When I remove my nipple from her mouth she cries and I put my hand back on her chest. That would settle her and she'd eventually move around and fall asleep. There is less drama with her when I''m next to her in bed - but she is still waking up. I guess my gameplan was to get her comfortable falling asleep with me next to her but without nursing. From there move to me being next to crib? I don't know. 

It is obvious that DD wants to be back asleep when she wakes up but she just can't get there. I either need her to not wake up as fully or go back to sleep more easily or both.

[Unlikely Mama]

Sounds like you're in a tough spot.  I was in a similar position when DD was about 6mo. in terms of wanting to get out of the house and not wanting to be tethered.  For us, I found that the only way to get my baby to nap in her crib (instead of ONLY in her Ergo carrier) was to stay home when it was time for a nap (tedious, I know) and consistently put her in her crib.  I would nurse her down (still do) and lay her down.  We also have a nap routine, which is basically a much more abbreviated version of bedtime routine. It's helpful because with time, I've noticed that no matter how awake she seems when we're playing downstairs, the minute we walk into our room with the lights off, put her in her sleep sack, etc., she is cued that it is time for sleep. And I thought I had one of those babies who could NEVER go to sleep in her crib.  She sometimes fusses for a couple minutes, but it never escalates.  As DD has gotten older, tired signs are less reliable and so I really go by wake times.  At 7mo., max wake time is 2.5 hours.  I'd try to get her on a consistent two nap a day schedule (when I say "schedule" I don't mean 9 & 2, but rather 2.25 hours from wake up for the first nap, then 2.5 hours from nap wake up put down for another nap, etc), with naps going no later than 4pm.  Do an early bedtime (by 6pm). Try it for a week, you might get results.