Nic, of all the mamas in our DDC, I've been hoping all along that you would have the birth you wanted. I knew how much you wanted this one to be different, and how much you wanted to trust that your body could do what it needed to to deliver your baby safely. I have nothing but respect and awe of you that you were brave enough to take on UCing, a very long and intense labor, and then a less than perfect hospital transfer. I think that no matter what, you have to be so proud of yourself for handling all of that!
I love that it was a very special bonding time for you and your dh, and I also love that you've come to understand some things about your body and seem to be at peace with them. and blessings to you and little Marah!