My son is 3.5 years old and during that time, his father has never laid eyes on him by his own choice. I told him that I was pregnant immediately after discovering I was; we have spoken on the phone twice since then - once right after my call to him and another about 2 years ago. I have never talked about him to my son as he is basically a non-entity in our life - a sperm donor. I have been pensively awaiting "the day" when he would as about his dad, but so far, he has not said one thing directly to me.
A couple of weeks ago I was in a restaurant that we frequent often, where the waitresses have become close to both of us (birthday parties, exchanging gifts, etc. - close acquaintances, I suppose), and one mentioned to me a conversation they had when I was not right there. The waitress had mentioned her son's father; to which my son replied, "I don't have one of those." She said, "One what?" He said, "A daddy - I don't have one of those." (She told me about this later).
Fast forward to a couple of days ago, I mentioned something to another waitress about the conversation (out of earshot of my son) saying I was surprised he hasn't said anything to me about it. Later the same night, she (within earshot of my son) asked just a general, cryptic (well, she thought she was) about his dad and whether or not I had heard from him, etc. Micah pipes up and says, "I don't have one of those!!" Very adamant, very "confident."
My question is....do I talk to him about it? What the heck do I say? Immediately following the "incident," I was too stunned and just didn't say anything. With him verbalizing the missing parental figure, I am wondering if it is bothering him but he is just bottling it up. He has in the past referenced other people's daddies, and if he sees a group of animals in a book, in life, or in pretend, he will name one of the larger animals Daddy along with Baby and Mommy. It seems he understands that most families include a father but not his. Overall, I have not seen it outwardly bother him that he has a lack of information or parental figure for that matter.
Do I wait for a direct question, or take this as an opening for a conversation? If I should say something, any ideas?