DS wants to eat meat. Bad. - Page 3

[mountainsun]

I didn't mean to *just* her, I meant to the family as a whole.  I think that if it is a moral/ethical thing, then it is a pretty BIG deal, and yes, we do impose our opinions and judgements on young children, as parents.  I know for my family, being veg is HUGE, I am assuming it is for this mama, as well, or she would not be posting about it.
 

And like I said, if he wants to eat meat because "his friends are doing it," well then, I think it is time for a major talk.  That is not a VALID enough reason, imho for the son to eat meat, at 6 years old.

I do agree that mom and Dad have to be on a unified front.  For my veggie family, my dh ate seafood until ds1 was about 1.  He decided at that point he would stop eating it because it would be too hard to explain to the children.   Kinda like how my dh gave up soda - he doesnt drink it anymore because we will not allow our kids to have it.

Eating meat is more than just "eating meat" for many people.  Not that easy.  I do not think a 6 year old has the capacity to understand that decision.

Originally Posted by meemee 

Originally Posted by mountainsun 

If being vegetarian is important to you, I would not let your 6 year old eat meat at this point.  

woah just coz its important to *you* you impose ur opinions on your child - esp. when the dad eats meat. i dont get why the mom's 'importance' is bigger than dad's. your family is veggie - not OPs. i think its really unfair to compare smoking to eating meat. 

i am sure the son is aware of both his parents feeling. and he'd like to test the waters out. sometimes you have to do it, to figure out what's important to you. 6 years old is plenty old to make up his mind. he is plenty old to say indirectly 'hey i wanna try it and see what i think of it'. 

[meemee]

mountainsun i understand what you are saying as a vegetarian.

my struggle is what is the dad going to say to say no to his son. 'believe your mom. she knows.' ya know. how can he say veggie is good when he cant stop eating meat. 

how can it be ok for daddy, but bad for son.

[Spring Lily]

Don't we all impose our opinions on our children? If they want to do things that go against our moral beliefs, do we let them just because they want to try it out? No. We pick our battles and let them make independent choices in many other areas of their daily lives, instead.

Children do not have the intellectual capacity to understand the bigger picture--the moral, physical, societal, and environment impact of their decision to eat meat. At age 6, they are just getting to the age where some of them are beginning to comprehend what death is.

I guess it goes back to the question, why doesn't the OP eat meat? Is it for health reasons or for more spiritual reasons? The answer changes how you'd handle this.

[meemee]

but its not a vegetarian family that we are talking about. 

is the mothers cause bigger than the fathers. 

all it is is a curiosity to check meat out - probably. maybe. 

dunno one parent eating meat in front of the child and the other parent saying that's bad and son shouldnt do it - that whole situation is bizare - no matter what the reasons are because it paints one in 'good' colour and one in 'bad'. 

my ex grew up in a mixed hh. their mom cooked them meat but never ate herself. all the kids tried it at some point or another. two of them are now vegetarians and the rest 3 are not. its a choice the sons made and were given the right to choose. 

and at 6 making it into a big issue could possibly confuse the child. 

for all you know he might take a bite and spit it out. or he could gobble it up. 

and i would imagine if the mom is of jewish background and the father isnt - he would at least honor her faith and not eat pork. 

[crunchy_mommy]

Originally Posted by meemee 

my struggle is what is the dad going to say to say no to his son. 'believe your mom. she knows.' ya know. how can he say veggie is good when he cant stop eating meat. 

how can it be ok for daddy, but bad for son.

I don't think it's that weird. Obviously it would be best if both parents could be on the same page, and even better if things like this could be discussed before getting married & having kids, but things don't always work out that way. 

I have a strong religious faith, and fortunately so does my husband. But if for some reason my husband was not religious or suddenly renounced our faith, I would still have a moral obligation to raise our children with our faith. Some people hold vegetarianism as close as religion, and thus have a moral obligation to raise their kids veg.

I don't, I'm not vegan primarily for ethical reasons, but then similar reasoning still applies. I'm vegan mostly for health reasons, and my DH is not. I feel that eating meat is unhealthy, yeah not quite on par with cigarettes but close. I have a moral obligation to raise my DS in the way that I feel is healthiest for him -- regardless of whether DH drinks or smokes or eats meat or refuses to exercise or whatever. Flip that around -- I have some mental health issues. I believe my DH has an absolute obligation to protect my DS from my issues in whatever way he deems necessary (luckily my issues are under control, but if not, I would expect DH to step in with DS!) Obviously this would get complicated if one person believed meat was essential to health & the other believed it was detrimental... DH & I are on the same page with it not being healthy, but he just has a hard time giving it up completely. Of course, in our house DH doesn't eat meat (unless it's leftovers someone gave him, and that's rare) & only eats it when he's out, so it's a little easier on all of us to enforce 'no meat'.

I guess if you believe that meat is healthy & necessary & completely ethical, this entire stance won't make any sense at all because the concept is just so foreign...

[texmati]

I don't see where the op said that her husband wasn't on board with the kids being veg, or that he ate meat in the home.

I think that it's ok to impose your beliefs on your son. OP can still say-- these are the choices we've made for you; and when you are older, you can decide for yourself.

As an aside, I feel there is a huge difference between literally forcing osmething down a kids throat, and not letting them eat something. The first I'd only do in a medical emergancy, the second I do 3 dozen times every day (we don't eat hair off the floor in this family, please!)