Did you birth with an under 2 at home?

[AFWife]

How did it go?

If I go into labor at the "right time" we can have someone here to help with DS....however, if I go during DH's work hours or go too fast we're on our own. (a friend from his work is invited and his mom is 4 hours away unless I go on the day she's in town for something unrelated)

Experiences are welcome! I think he understands that there's a baby in my belly (he talks to my belly and does "nice touch" a lot) and sometimes when I'm in pain (like my back pain) he's calm and comes and comforts me...but a couple of times at the chiro he FREAKED when I was getting adjusted. So, there's no telling how he'll react.

[MrsJewelsRae]

My ds was 22 months old when my dd was born at home.  My labor went much faster than expected and my support people missed the birth by 10 minutes.  I had her at almost 10pm and when the midwives arrived (15 mins before she was born!) they were in a rush to get set up and I started making noise as I transfered from the tub to my bed.  Dh was trying to figure out what to do and take a video (which my sis was supposed to do).  Ds woke up and came in my room when I was 9 cm and he calmly assessed the situation and went and got a box of blocks to play with in the doorway.  I only pushed a couple minutes and wasn't too dramatic with noise (loud moaning and groaning, no screams) and he was completely unconcerned by it.  Dd was born and with her first cries he dropped his blocks and payed attention and promptly climbed up on the bed to see her.  It was so sweet, he stared at her and "hi baby" and gave her a kiss, it was just adorable!!  Melts my heart thinking back on it. :)  He did really well, it was totally a non issue, if it had been, dh would have had to handle ds and let the midwives handle me.  When my mom and sisters got there 10 minutes later my dh answered the door and said "you missed it, she was born 10 minutes ago" and they all laughed at him and said "yeah right", thinking he was kidding!  ;)   Then my mom heard dd cry a bit and she went "oh no" and  burst into tears cause she missed it!! lol!  I wouldn't change a thing about how it turned out, it was perfect!  Dh even managed to video it while keeping an eye on ds. 

[prothyraia]

My son was 20 months old when his brother was born-  he wasn't actually at the birth, since my MIL was available to watch him, but I think he would have been fine with it.

I'm mostly commenting, though, to mention that he also freaked out at the chiropractor.   I think it's different when a stranger is Doing Something to a Helpless Parent as opposed to what a typical homebirth would look like, if that makes sense?

[kawa kamuri]

Not yet but I will in June!

With my last birth I was super worried about how the kids would be and I think that's one of the factors that led me to have a deep night birth. My mom came over but everyone stayed asleep. I don't think my LO will deal well with stranger care or with anyone but her daddy. There are months left to figure it out. I'll be keeping my eyes out for experiences but, for the most part, I think it'll all work out again.

[Marissamom]

Originally Posted by MrsJewelsRae 

My ds was 22 months old when my dd was born at home.  My labor went much faster than expected and my support people missed the birth by 10 minutes.  I had her at almost 10pm and when the midwives arrived (15 mins before she was born!) they were in a rush to get set up and I started making noise as I transfered from the tub to my bed.  Dh was trying to figure out what to do and take a video (which my sis was supposed to do).  Ds woke up and came in my room when I was 9 cm and he calmly assessed the situation and went and got a box of blocks to play with in the doorway.  I only pushed a couple minutes and wasn't too dramatic with noise (loud moaning and groaning, no screams) and he was completely unconcerned by it.  Dd was born and with her first cries he dropped his blocks and payed attention and promptly climbed up on the bed to see her.  It was so sweet, he stared at her and "hi baby" and gave her a kiss, it was just adorable!!  Melts my heart thinking back on it. :)  He did really well, it was totally a non issue, if it had been, dh would have had to handle ds and let the midwives handle me.  When my mom and sisters got there 10 minutes later my dh answered the door and said "you missed it, she was born 10 minutes ago" and they all laughed at him and said "yeah right", thinking he was kidding!  ;)   Then my mom heard dd cry a bit and she went "oh no" and  burst into tears cause she missed it!! lol!  I wouldn't change a thing about how it turned out, it was perfect!  Dh even managed to video it while keeping an eye on ds. 

thanks for sharing. DD will be 22 months when her brother is born, and I really want her to be there to greet him. 

[mylilmonkeys]

I have had several births where the next oldest was just under or just over two.  My kids have slept through all my births, so it's never been an issue.  My oldest woke just as his sister was being born, our first home birth.  My M-I-L was there and took him to the potty, so she was just born when he came in and was so excited to welcome the baby.  The others have met their new siblings when they woke in the morning, most births being between 2AM-4AM.  Oh, yes, one birth my sister lived nearby, and I ended up laboring during the evening.  We sent the kids around the corner to stay with their Uncle and Grandpa, but Daddy called them all home minutes before birth to put them to bed (he had no idea I was moments from birthing).  After everyone was in jammies, they came in to greet their new brother.  So, I really haven't had an awake, active toddler around while I birthed.

[gravida]

  My daughter was 21 months when my son was born. I had my cousin come to act as my doula if she was asleep and babysitter if she was awake. I went into labor right before her bedtime so my cousin put her to bed while we set up the pool. Her room is right next to ours and I am a fairly vocal birther. She didn't wake up at all. DS was born just after midnight and she woke up at her normal 6 am to meet him.

[broodymama]

DS1 was 22 months when DD1 was born.  It was a quick 2 hour middle of the night labor and he slept through the whole thing, met her when he woke up the next morning.

DD1 had just turned 2 four days before DD2 was born.  A friend and her 3 kids came over and hung out upstairs in the living room while I gave birth downstairs in the family room.  Once again my labor was only 2 hours and it was an early morning labor, the kids were awake for the last hour of it but I didn't see them.

DD2 was 22 months when DS2 was born.  It was a whirlwind (less than 30 minutes total) middle of the night labor, so all the kids slept through it.  They met him after breakfast the next morning. 

[tracymom1]

Ds was 21 months old when Dd was born and he had no idea what was going on.  We talked about it a lot and tried to prepare him with books, but when it came down to it, he was only inteested in the birth pool and supplies.  My MIL was there to keep an eye on him but he was very calm and didn't really notice what was happening.  I really think that at that age they can't really put all the piece together just yet.  I do very much look forward to seeing how he does at the next birth when he will be almost 4yo - I actually worry a bit more about it this time around because he is so much more aware.

[IntuitiveJamie]

My son was 22 months when I birthed our 2nd at home. He slept through almost all of it and woke up at the very end. But we had called a friend to come watch him (she was on call) and she hung out with him for the last hour of the birth. He had no clue what was going on and he didn't cry for me and everything was simple and went well.

[~Katie~]

My DS was 20 months when DD was born. He was actually the only one present for my labor, but he did end up going to bed 30 minutes before she was born. I think deep down I couldn't get through the last part of labor while worrying about him so I encouraged him to go to bed. In hindsight I think he would have been totally fine for the birth. He was very concerned if I leaned over during a contraction but he wasn't fearful, he actually seemed really excited almost as if he knew something really big was happening. I'm not a vocal birther so that may have made a difference. He would rub my arm during a contraction and say "okay, mama?" and he LOVED tossing toys into the birth pool while I was in there. I like to call him my doula in training 

[citymagnolia]

I had a different experience than the other posters! DD1 was 26 months, so not under 2 but close. I labored for 4 hours on a futon mattress on the floor on my hands and knees, leaning on a stack of pillows. From my first contraction, I went straight to laborland with intense contractions and I couldn't talk at all. At first DD was cool, just played calmly, but once everyone arrived--doula, friend, and my mom--DD got excited and wanted to play. There was also a crazy blizzard outside, so that energy was in the air too. When she started running back and forth on the futon, we ended up calling my brother to come get her. She was oblivious to me because I was silent and fairly still, but she definitely wanted everyone else's attention. I'd say, plan and hope to share your birth with your DS, but try to have a backup plan if at all possible.

[rad]

I've usually had a child under at home during a birth. My oldest DS was just a couple month over 2 when DD was born. DD was 21 months when DS2 was born. DS2 was 20 months when DS3 was born. And DS3 was 15 month when DS4 was born. For 3 of those births, my older kids slept right through the whole thing. We just woke them up to meet their new sibling. For my 4th baby, it wa in the evening and we did have a friend come over and stay with the older 3 kids while I labored and birthed. They all stayed downstairs until the baby was born. I'm kind of hoping this baby comes while they're all sleeping again. It was much easier.