napping at 3 mo

[MommaLura]

Ok, I have an almost 3 month old and a three year old. As much as I would like to nap with baby and hold her all the time, I can't. My ds is not getting the attention I feel he needs, the house isn't getting cleaned like it should, ect. I'm frustrated, overwhelmed and agitated by the situation. She does sleep in the ergo and during that time ds and I will play outside. My dd has some reflux and easily gets a stuffy nose. She sleeps like a champ if I'm holding her, but lay her down and she wakes up She hates being swaddled, she gags on pacifiers and her fingers and hates the carseat.

So, has anyone else been there and had to teach the baby to sleep alone for naps? I don't want her to be alone, but I need to feel like a more capable mother.

[RaeDyCo]

  This stage is so tough.  I know with both my boys, I couldn't teach them how to sleep on their own, they just eventually did it.  I know a lot of people don't like using them, but the baby swing was my lifesaver.  Both boys, esp DS1, loved the swing and would nap great in it.  Sometimes it would only be for 45 mins but sometimes it was for a couple hours.  Eventually, they would stop sleeping in the swing and would nap in their crib.

[Knitting Mama]

I would just get in the habit of wearing her basically all the time, whether you and your son are going out to play or not. Maybe get a wrap for use in the house, since it's less bulky than an Ergo. I wore my daughter all. the. time, until she decided that playing with toys was cool and she wanted to do it more (4 or so months). The swing is also a great idea, although it took Cecilia a little while to warm up to it, so for some kids it's not instant success with a swing. But she takes most of her naps in a swing these days.

[terra-pip]

I have a 3 year old and a 7 year old and a 4 month old---I just want to say I'm right there with you. My dd (the baby) likes to sleep in my arms or when I am right there with her. I worry about my sons getting attention---especially since we homeschool etc.

What has helped me is to sit and do some work with my older son when baby is nursing and sleeping on me or to sit and read to my 3 yo when she's nursing/sleeping. Sometimes I can persuade my boys to lay down with me and the baby in my bed. She'll nurse and sleep and I will read some chapters of a book to them. Sometimes my 3 yo does not go for this because I can't persuade him that he doesn't have to nap if he doesn't want to (of course he nearly always falls asleep and so he trys his hardest to avoid it--silly boy)

We all just hang out on the front room rug when dd is awake. She has tummy time and the boys do what they do and I just sort of talk to all three at the same time. And then there are the times the boys play together and the baby is content to hang out in a bouncy seat for a minute and drool while i clean something real fast. Oh about housework---let it go momma! I make sure the kitchen area is clean and the front room is swept and reasonably clutter free--I wipe down a bathroom sink when i go in there and do a weekly speed cleaning when husband is home. The laundry is always going and everyone helps with that. But with a baby in the house you have to really lower expectations about a lot of housework. Focus on the truly necessary-clean kitchen/bathroom/swept floors and focus on that area that keeps you sane. I don't really care too much what my bedrooms look like---but the front room absolutely has to be clutter free and dust free for my sanity.

I hardly babywear in the house past the newborn stage--I like them to learn to get along with some toys on  a safe playspot on the rug for a few minutes while I speed load a dishwasher for example. Or sit beside them while playing with the boys.

[MommaLura]

Thank you for the ideas!  The swing does not put her to sleep, but she'll sit in there when I need to put her down. On the house, all I'm trying to do is maintain. The laundry pile is getting out of hand, dishes get done every other day and I can pick up the living room as soon as she wakes up. I'm trying! Thank you, ladies! I want to enjoy every second of her, she's our last baby, but I often feel like I'm failing. I know it will get better as she gets older, but I'm wanting to keep her small too, lol.

[Knitting Mama]

Cecilia very, very rarely falls asleep in the swing, but she will stay asleep if I put her in there after nursing her down. Maybe give that a try?