Please help me feel normal, a little. WARNING, may be Triggers - Page 3

[chaoticzenmom]

I'm a lot like you.  I have learned to coach my thinking when I get upset about these things.  I tell myself repeat until I feel better (I'm doing the best I can to keep my own children safe.) and (It would be horrible enough if it happened to me, I can't live as if it did happen to me.) 

It may seem cold to live out other people's horrors in your own head.  It's like if you take your own lack of horror for granted, it'll surely happen to you.  Whatever happened to those children was surely horrible.  They're not feeling any pain now.  LIght a candle for them, send prayers or energy to their loved ones and live your own life. 

Also, I don't watch the news. There's so much love and light in the world, but the news is all dark and scary.  It's not reality, it's distorted to play on our fears.  I don't watch horror films anymore either.

People (and animals for that matter) in the world all over have lots of battles to face.  We also have a lot of love and blessings. 

((hugs))

[~Charlie's~Angel~]

HOLY MOLY, I work down the road from RIT.  And JUNE?  Try July.....maybe!  lol

And thank you.
 

Originally Posted by Addie 

I just wanted to add to the chorus that thinks this is fairly normal. I think its natural that these stories affect you more once you have kids. Suddenly you can place yourself in the story in a way that you never could before, and that can be terrifying. Another example - my DH was in the military before we had a child, and he deployed to Iraq at the start of the war. Anything on the news about servicemen would reduce me to a babbling mess. It was just too real.

If you really feel it's debilitating, though, then it might be time to look at addressing it.

And, for the record, I grew up in upstate NY and went to RIT. Those winter blues are NO JOKE. Definitely look at supplements, ways to get outside, diet, whatever in order to make it through to the spring (which comes in June, right?)

 Thank you to all who have given me hope, commiseration, empathy, and showed me ways to enduce peace.  I am NOT at the dibilitating stage, nor have I ever been.  And I dont question my FORMER interest in crime stories since I cannot even think about the details of the stories anymore.  I would rather try to move forward and look ahead.

Chaoticzen, THANK YOU.  That was beautiful and just what I needed. 

Bisou, you know.  You.just.KNOW.  lol  THank you!

[camracrazy]

My oldest was about a year old when Laci Peterson disappeared. The thought of her being pregnant and wanting her baby so badly just tore me up. I followed the case at the old CTV boards. I definately DON"T think you are crazy or weird for following true crime. I follow it also.

My nervous mom thing is heights. I hate heights. I hate the thought of being in an airplane. I am fairly sure someone is going to fall out of the roller coaster car and die every time I see it. My dh, otoh, doesn't have these fears, and took oldest dd on this HUGE roller coaster last summer. I almost had a heart attack while at the same time I wanted to strangle him! I know it's MY fear and that I shouldn't transfer that to my kids if they don't have the same fear, but it is so hard to reign in the part of you that is screaming, "NO, NO, NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

[ShwarmaQueen]

Oh man, I experience this too, big time. There was a story here in Houston (Galveston to be exact) about a baby a few years ago that made me so physically ill that I actually puked. It's so hard when you're a mother to watch the news. I find that avoiding hearing about it helps immensely (I know that's so so bad though!) and hugging my babies a little tighter everyday. It's such a crazy world we live in. :(

[Bisou]

Hope you're doing well Ms Angel.  Thinking of you tonight! 

[~Charlie's~Angel~]

Quite coincidental you were thinking of me on THIS night.  lol  It was my birthday, and NO, i had an AWFUL day, AWFUL weekend actually that started Friday morning and didnt really end until Sunday afternoon, maybe even Monday morning.  Every year it seems my birthday just SUCKS.  No matter how good my intentions of having a good day, it would seem that is when the universe decides to rain a sh*t storm on my HEAD.  I would like to skip that week for the rest of my life if I could.   I know thats terrrible of me to say.  I could have it so much worse then I do.  But honestly, it seems like thats the one DAY I should be able to just relax a little.  NOPE.  Not this year..........AGAIN.  SIGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Im a bit better now, although this morning wasnt all that great.  I will be off for the next four days though, and hope and pray that things go relativly smoothly.  I should probably be posting this somewhere else, but can I really be yelled at for going off topic in my own thread?  lol  probably, it would fall in line with the way things have been going lately. 

 

Originally Posted by Bisou 

Hope you're doing well Ms Angel.  Thinking of you tonight! 

[~Charlie's~Angel~]

Ive decided I cant even just watch TV.  CANT DO IT.  I was down in the break room getting a slice of breakfast pizza (we have a 42 inch flat screen on the walls for the guys when they go on break, it is constantly on one of the local stations) there was a salvation army commercial on that brought me to tears.  UGH!  Also didnt help that before I could get out of there, the local news came on with yet ANOTHER story that turns my stomach.  I CANT ESCAPE THE MADNESS no matter how much I try to censor myself.  INSANE!

[Bisou]

Hi Charlie's Angel:

How odd.  My birthday is a December birthday too, and I always really dislike my birthday too!  I used to wait around for someone to plan something for my birthday, but then decided (when that didn't usually happen) that there was no shame in inviting people to celebrate my birthday with me.  One year I planned a birthday party at my place, cooked a bunch of food, had at least 10 RSVPs, and only one person showed up.  Talk about depressing!  Actually the last few years my birthdays have been pretty good, and this year was one of the more fun birthdays I've had in a while.

Sorry yours was so crappy. 

Things have been really crappy with my little one for the past week, and I am just so bummed as it's Christmas the day after tomorrow and I just don't want things to be this way.  But that is getting us even MORE off topic, so I will save that for a PM.

I hope you and your family have a WONDERFUL holiday.  Hang in there!
 

Originally Posted by ~Charlie's~Angel~ 

Quite coincidental you were thinking of me on THIS night.  lol  It was my birthday, and NO, i had an AWFUL day, AWFUL weekend actually that started Friday morning and didnt really end until Sunday afternoon, maybe even Monday morning.  Every year it seems my birthday just SUCKS.  No matter how good my intentions of having a good day, it would seem that is when the universe decides to rain a sh*t storm on my HEAD.  I would like to skip that week for the rest of my life if I could.   I know thats terrrible of me to say.  I could have it so much worse then I do.  But honestly, it seems like thats the one DAY I should be able to just relax a little.  NOPE.  Not this year..........AGAIN.  SIGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Im a bit better now, although this morning wasnt all that great.  I will be off for the next four days though, and hope and pray that things go relativly smoothly.  I should probably be posting this somewhere else, but can I really be yelled at for going off topic in my own thread?  lol  probably, it would fall in line with the way things have been going lately. 

 

Originally Posted by Bisou 

Hope you're doing well Ms Angel.  Thinking of you tonight! 

 

[~Charlie's~Angel~]

Bisou,

[Bisou]

Quote:

Originally Posted by chaoticzenmom 

I'm a lot like you.  I have learned to coach my thinking when I get upset about these things.  I tell myself repeat until I feel better (I'm doing the best I can to keep my own children safe.) and (It would be horrible enough if it happened to me, I can't live as if it did happen to me.) 

It may seem cold to live out other people's horrors in your own head.  It's like if you take your own lack of horror for granted, it'll surely happen to you.  Whatever happened to those children was surely horrible.  They're not feeling any pain now.  LIght a candle for them, send prayers or energy to their loved ones and live your own life. 

Also, I don't watch the news. There's so much love and light in the world, but the news is all dark and scary.  It's not reality, it's distorted to play on our fears.  I don't watch horror films anymore either.

People (and animals for that matter) in the world all over have lots of battles to face.  We also have a lot of love and blessings. 

((hugs))

I definitely have had a problem with imagining, in great detail, horrific crimes against people (adults, children, whatever).  I think for me it's trying to understand HOW COULD SOMEONE DO THAT?  I won't go into detail about the kinds of things I think or wonder because I don't want to freak people out, but that's what the nature of my thought process focuses on.  I just can't wrap my mind around doing something like that, and then I wonder what causes it.  Mental illness?  Evil?  Is there such a thing? 

My son and I were victims of an attempted home invasion (where the person, a stranger but someone who lived across the street, had an intention to harm me and possibly my son) about a year and a half ago, and that definitely increased my fear (understandably), but I had these thoughts and fears before this ever happened.  I was raised by parents who constantly scared my brother and I with horrific stories of abducted and murdered kids to make sure we knew what could happen if we weren't careful.  My mom also witnessed a child be kidnapped my strangers when she was a child on Halloween in the 1950s, so I am sure that really affected her view of the world. 

Like you said, I've decided that no amount of WORRY can prevent such things from happening to me or others.  I can use a reasonable amount of caution (locked doors and windows, a security system, lights around outside of house, etc), but I can't let that paralyze me.  I am sure 90-95% of people who worry about such things will never have something like this happen to them.  I know it can be hard though!!!!

Merry Christmas to all of you who celebrate Christmas.

Hugs to Charlie's Angel and her family!!!!