My parents divorced when I was 6 and I haven't seen or heard from my father since I was 8 (he had a drug problem and I guess he never got it under control). It sounds naive, but I honestly thought I was fine with it, since I "turned out fine" -- I'm a compassionate, educated, loving, thoughtful person who has a wonderful husband and children.
But then my DS turned 6, and I suddenly found myself thinking about my dad all the time. I'll notice myself looking at him and seeing how tiny he is, and thinking, "How could someone just walk away from that?" I think about the zillions of memories DS and I share, and think about how my dad (who was loving and involved when he was around) must have those memories of me too.
This part sounds silly, but I watched The Wrestler (with Mickey Rourke and Marisa Tomei) last year, and I found myself feeling disgusted. It bothered me how this man who abandoned his kids was getting all this sympathy for his "loss," even though that loss was his own fault. It made me sick to think about the possibility that my dad may have used his abandonment of us as some sob story to get sympathy over the years.
I know this is all over the place. I don't want to connect with my father. I'm just wondering if any of you had a surge of memories and feelings you thought you were over when your kids reached the age you were when something big happened in your life.