~*~ December Pagan Families Chat~*~ It's Yule/Midsummer!!!!! - Page 2

[bluets]

Originally Posted by Aubergine68 

I REALLY want to send out lots of cards this year.  There are a lot of family I stayed in touch with through the relatives that passed last year.  I want to make sure to reach out to those relations who I might otherwise lose touch with.  Am even contemplating a family form letter.

one of the most creative versions of the family form letter i've seen was in the guise of a multiple choice question about what the particular couple had done over the past year.  it focused on highlights and some of the more obscure happenings or interests... and it beat a long narrative hands-down.  if only i were so creative...

[DaughterOfKali]

Oops. Totally forgot to check in.

Trying to clean before decorating.  Am tired of the never ending cycle of hormone hell (starts at ovulation and ends halfway through period.  Can't find anything natural to help regulate the hormones/moods.  May have to try meds.  Sigh.

Liza- Yay for money in the bank!

Boo to yucky winter weather (for those who have been hit recently.)

Another boo to dead or dying vehicles.

Hugs and healing to all those who need it.

[mamaofthree]

what a night. i had nightmares all night long. i am pooped out this morning. 

we are off to the park to hang with the homieschoolers. :) have a great day everyone. 

h

[Maiasaura]

Originally Posted by Aubergine68 We are trying for a low-budget holiday but maybe I can manage an Ikea run for a bag of bulk tea lights!

 I am totally a fruitcake/plum pudding kinda girl, and will be doing without those treats, unless a gf shop in a nearby city has em.

The dollar store usually has bulk tea lights...well, not technically bulk, but like 50 or 100 in a pack.

I just googled "Gluten Free Plum Pudding" for fun, and lots of pages came up!

Originally Posted by mamaofthree we are off to the park to hang with the homieschoolers. :)

I know that was a typo, but such a cute one! Homieschoolers indeed

I know I have been terribly down about M and stuff...mostly because in the past couple of days, he said he didn't really have any inclination to stop drinking, because his list of "reasons not to live" was longer than his "reasons to live". I said go ahead and quantify that on paper and see how the reality stacks up to what's in your head.

I don't know if he actually did, but this morning on the phone he said "I DO have reasons to live. I have you, and I should be grateful for that, and I am grateful for that, but I should be more grateful. You have given me so much, and taught me so much, and I really do have good things". It's a start. I'm sure it'll be a bumpy road, with lots of setbacks, but it's a start.

When I think about the totality of it, he really has had one very crappy life, pretty much. Poor thing I'd probably be pretty down on the idea of living, too, if I were in his shoes. It's a wonder he's still standing.

I have hope....just a little. Alternately hope and no hope, but as long as I'm breathing, I will be there for him, and for our relationship

[Indigo73]

Ack, my iPad wouldn't let me sub last night so here I am only a day late.  

Hugs & Healing vibes to the sickies.  Happy Money vibes to those that need it.

I am counting down until school is done for the semester - two weeks, two final papers and two final exams to go.  But what a blast.  It is WONDERFUL to be a student again!  But then I get 5 weeks off from school and one of those I will also be off from work.  I will not admit to how many last minute knitting/crochet projects I agreed to, so have those deadlines looming too.  But all is pretty good in our household.  Think this is going to be another low key holiday for us.  I like that.

[bluets]

Originally Posted by Maiasaura 

Originally Posted by Aubergine68 We are trying for a low-budget holiday but maybe I can manage an Ikea run for a bag of bulk tea lights!

 I am totally a fruitcake/plum pudding kinda girl, and will be doing without those treats, unless a gf shop in a nearby city has em.

The dollar store usually has bulk tea lights...well, not technically bulk, but like 50 or 100 in a pack.

I just googled "Gluten Free Plum Pudding" for fun, and lots of pages came up!

my fruitcake... well, I have 2 versions I've made in the past.  i never did like the fruitcake my mom made so i took much time to

the first isn't even really a fruitcake - more of a winter fruit pie, take your favorite dried fruits in about equal parts (make sure that they would taste good all mixed together) -- you'll need about 2-3 c. of dried fruit.  dump them all into a ceramic, non-reactive bowl.  toss in some brandy or rum (sorry, Maia, not for you, but you could try rum-flavoring?), add in your favorite seasonal spices (1-2 tsp?)...  soak them overnight.  dump the whole shebang into a buttered pie plate.  drop in a few small cubes of butter.  sprinkle some chopped nuts on top.  bake (at 350F ?)  for half an hour or so, until warm all the way through.  serve with ice cream or whipping cream...  eat.  This is a variation of a similar recipe in "Cooking Like a Goddess" - i think she actually uses a pie crust but i'm too lazy to figure out how to do a good GF/Primal/Paleo pie crust.

my raw version.  i've misplaced the recipe but this one looks pretty close: http://www.thedailyrawcafe.com/2007/12/terilynn-you-got-some-splain-to-do.html  -- i'd leave out the agave though for my gang.

[femme_rouge]

Whoops...missed the new thread.  Yay December!   Setting the intention for peace, love and clear action.  Thinking of all you lovelies and sending love, light and big gentle hugs.

Day 2 of the whole family home sick (everyone but me... let it pass me by...let it pass me by...).  We're hanging in there pretty well considering.  I guess I'll go solo today to DD's parent teacher conference.  She loves school.  It makes my heart happy.  During Thanksgiving she made pictures about being grateful for school.  We'll see what the maestra says.

I haven't mentioned it in awhile, but we're still open to relocating.  We're looking at Paraguay, Venezuela and Puerto Vallarta. Anyone spend any time in any of the locations?

Gotta go take care of the sickies, but wanted to pop by for a quick Hello.

[Aeress]

*yawn* Why am I so tired today? I am cleaning out the girls closet, it used to be our "junk" closet and when we moved the girls all of the junk remained and we added the girls toys to it- what a mess! I am half way done, stopped for a potty break and coffee and can't seem to get back to work.

My house is chaotic at the moment- getting back from vacation plus trying to get organized for the holidays. It is getting there but it is taking a long time.

I did find a labrynth today while picking up coffee. :) The girls are loving it. Once I am done with cleaning, I am planning to make cookies. Better get my butt in gear and get back to work.

My cards are almost ready to go- just need stamps.

[_ktg_]

Oh no Did I miss the card exchange? eeeek!

Originally Posted by Aeress 

*yawn* Why am I so tired today? I am cleaning out the girls closet, it used to be our "junk" closet and when we moved the girls all of the junk remained and we added the girls toys to it- what a mess! I am half way done, stopped for a potty break and coffee and can't seem to get back to work.

My house is chaotic at the moment- getting back from vacation plus trying to get organized for the holidays. It is getting there but it is taking a long time.

I did find a labrynth today while picking up coffee. :) The girls are loving it. Once I am done with cleaning, I am planning to make cookies. Better get my butt in gear and get back to work.

My cards are almost ready to go- just need stamps.

[NewMoonMum]

valerie, I am so sorry for your loss.  Much love and light to you and you family in this difficult time. Try to take care of yourself.

Good vibes and love and hugs to everybody!

A nutty toddler and a screaming baby leave little time for me-time! I realized this morning I had not showered in, I think 3 days?? I smelled it, too.

I was insane enough to attempt our first-ever family shower.  We have a solarveil sling made to go in water, Shockingly, it went fine, and I got everything done but shampooing my son's hair, because he would not tolerate the shower head and screams whenever I wash his hair, anyway. Nonetheless, it was a major victory!

Especially since I am about delirious with lack of food. I guess my medicine is making me nauseous. Yesterday all I ate was about 6 tortilla chips and almost threw up from it. I don't weigh myself but I seem to be shrinking already. I guess that's fine but A, I need energy to keep up with the kids and B, there's the whole breastfeeding thing.  I know I've read that even under pretty harsh lack of food, breastmilk holds up pretty well as good nourishment.  But of course I'm trying to eat as best I can.

I hope everybody has a lovely day and week!

[wombatclay]

Cards are in the planning stage.  :)

Super cold today, some snow.

The treatment plan/payment schedule just arrived from the dentist and... I don't know what we'll do.  It's just a few dollars shy of 2000.  :(  Even with the CareCredit card... we just don't have that much "room" in our budget.  DH and I are going to ask our parents for dental assistance instead of gifts, but... ouch.  And even if we par the whole thing down to just the emergency/must be done now stuff it's 1000 dollars.

I have a dr appointment scheduled for the 10th and I'm debating it.  It wont be covered so I'll have to pay out of pocket, probably 200-300 dollars.  There isn't anything "critical" but I haven't seen a dr in roughly 6 years and there are a lot of "chronic" things that worry me a bit.  I'm now in my fifth month of thrush/MRSA in my breasts... the diflucan, the "triple nipple" paste, the mupiricin, the gentian violet, the grapefruit seed extract, the honey and probiotics, the dietary changes... nothing works for more than a few days.  My menstrual cycles started out fairly light after Tor's birth but every month my bleeding is longer/heavier.  November was 16 straight days of pp lochia level flow.  My chin has been broken out for more than a year.  I am /always/ tired.  I find I'm getting depressed more and more frequently.  Food tastes funny/off... not bad, but not the way it "should" taste.  I have no energy, no patience, I cry a lot more easily.  So obviously something isn't right.  But without decent insurance and with our tight budget (and now dd1's dental bill) I just can't afford a dr visit that might just end up being a "well, you have three small kiddos and are old enough for peri-menopause" dismissal or a "lets do a bunch of expensive tests and follow up visits" rabbit hole.  DH wants me to go, but especially now that I've seen what the dentist wants?  I don't know if I can justify it to myself.

Argh!

[NewMoonMum]

oh, clay-Justify it like this-Goddess forbid something is very wrong. You need to take care of it, because what would your kids do if you passed away?

not to sound dramatic, but you really MUST take care of yourself for those kids!!!

 for good health

[mamaofthree]

clay i agree with NMM, you need to take care of you. i do get the whole money issue and putting it off because it is you, but would you want your dh to put it off or would you want to have the kids not go? you gotta take care of it honey.

h

[Aeress]

Clay- thinking of you

NMM- I remember those early days when eating was a chore and not feeling great- before dh would leave for the day, I had him put out food that was easy for me to eat but healthy. He would cut up fruit (put it in the fridge), cut cheese, individ servings of stuff to microwave, nuts etc. This really did help me get food that was healthier and tastier than what I had been doing. I also gave in and put dd in a swing so I could sit and eat for five minutes. I would get very upset about not being able to eat without having a baby crying at me. Not saying you have to get a swing or anything, but maybe a bouncy seat or something to allow you to reallly eat. *hugs*

[Valerie.Qc]

(((Clay))) Please, take care of yourself! This is a moment where you need to think like they tell us in a flight: put your oxygen mask on yourself before trying to help others!

AF was going smoothly till in the middle of the night. Bad cramping and lower back pain... and no more coffee in the house. :-(

I'm still in this foggy dreamy state... still unable to have a good cry to release some tension I feel building up inside... Can't get a good resting sleep...

My father wants to know if I want to say something at the service or read... I'm scared... I tried to write something about my mom all week and the words won't come, my writer's mind refuse to admit that she's gone, refuse to seal the facts with a tribute...

[LionessMom]

Originally Posted by wombatclay 

Cards are in the planning stage.  :)

Super cold today, some snow.

The treatment plan/payment schedule just arrived from the dentist and... I don't know what we'll do.  It's just a few dollars shy of 2000.  :(  Even with the CareCredit card... we just don't have that much "room" in our budget.  DH and I are going to ask our parents for dental assistance instead of gifts, but... ouch.  And even if we par the whole thing down to just the emergency/must be done now stuff it's 1000 dollars.

I have a dr appointment scheduled for the 10th and I'm debating it.  It wont be covered so I'll have to pay out of pocket, probably 200-300 dollars.  There isn't anything "critical" but I haven't seen a dr in roughly 6 years and there are a lot of "chronic" things that worry me a bit.  I'm now in my fifth month of thrush/MRSA in my breasts... the diflucan, the "triple nipple" paste, the mupiricin, the gentian violet, the grapefruit seed extract, the honey and probiotics, the dietary changes... nothing works for more than a few days.  My menstrual cycles started out fairly light after Tor's birth but every month my bleeding is longer/heavier.  November was 16 straight days of pp lochia level flow.  My chin has been broken out for more than a year.  I am /always/ tired.  I find I'm getting depressed more and more frequently.  Food tastes funny/off... not bad, but not the way it "should" taste.  I have no energy, no patience, I cry a lot more easily.  So obviously something isn't right.  But without decent insurance and with our tight budget (and now dd1's dental bill) I just can't afford a dr visit that might just end up being a "well, you have three small kiddos and are old enough for peri-menopause" dismissal or a "lets do a bunch of expensive tests and follow up visits" rabbit hole.  DH wants me to go, but especially now that I've seen what the dentist wants?  I don't know if I can justify it to myself.

Argh!

do you take extra vitamins esp b12 etc? i have found them helpful with the emotional stuff. also eat lots of garlic, it helps clear out yeast/fungus. green tea, RRL tea, and lemon water would all help as well. i try not to drink anything else. i try not to eat anything except fatty meats and veggies. and i use fresh herbs. it sounds like you have a system wide yeast/fungal infection. the fastest way to help it is to quit feeding it. hence the diet i listed. any starch will feed it. i had told you all about the fungus on my head and this is what i have been researching on the net. i cant find a specific test they do though. but they have to prescribe months worth of strong antifungals. the yeast/fungus can be in your stomach keeping you from absorbing the minerals and vitamins. which can affect your mood, cycles, immune system etc. but you gotta keep eating this way for months and months.

not saying i am psychic and know what your problem is but it might help. :)

[Aubergine68]

Valérie - I remember the numb feeling and trying to describe it - I told someone after I lost my dad that I felt like a balloon floating away into space after the string that tied me to earth was cut.  I found the funeral service and gathering with family was helpful in getting me to start feeling what I needed to feel.  

Quote:

Originally Posted by Valerie.Qc 

My father wants to know if I want to say something at the service or read... I'm scared... I tried to write something about my mom all week and the words won't come, my writer's mind refuse to admit that she's gone, refuse to seal the facts with a tribute...

:hug That's hard to think about doing -- I wrote and delivered (with my sister) the eulogy for my father, made it through the delivery of it - but I was angry at him underneath it all for the way he died and that carried me through , and we were not super-close to start with, though I loved him deeply. 

On the one hand, funerals feel to me like they come too soon -- there is a lot of work to do, dealing with grief, and it feels (for me anyway) like the date of a funeral forces me to do the work too fast.  Otoh, I think the need to come together in tribute for the loved one who was lost helps prevent us from avoiding the pain and burying the feelings too soon and too deep, if that makes sense. My grandmother did not want a funeral and so one was not held - just a graveside service for immediate family.  I did not speak against her wishes, but I think that was ultimately unkind to many extended family who loved her and needed to pay tribute and say goodbye.  Anyway, sorry for digression, If you decide that this is something you want to do, you will be ok - I am sure that your family and friends will support you through it.  If you decide that you are not ready - well you *are* a writer and there will be plenty of opportunities to write and share/publish a tribute to your mom in the future. The funeral is the beginning of that process, not the end of it.  And those that love your mom will need those words from you in times to come as much or more than they do right now. Do the best you can with what the way you are feeling right now.

Clay, I hope you find healing that you need.   That infection has just gone on too long - I wish I knew something to suggest that might help..  I'm having surgery on Monday to hopefully clear out a similar infection, having run through all the natural and less-natural options short of surgery over the past 6 months, and I'm just nodding along with your description of how it affects you.  I can't believe you have done so much for so long with that in your system.  Is there any prospect of being able to go to bed for a few days and do nothing but rest and nurse over the holiday.

[witchygrrl]

Hi all,

I feel very behind with being so sick. After a bout of bronchitis (which is still there a little bit), I just battled a day and half long migraine. I *never* get migraines, so it really threw me for a loop. Of course, I was supposed to teach yesterday, but as I couldn't even sit up for more than a few minutes, I canceled everything. I really hope I can feel better too. Healing vibes to all of the other sickies, especially you, clay. It definitely sounds like there's a major hormonal balance issue going on, and I sympathize on not wanting to go, both for financial and "what would they do, anyway?" reasons.

Valerie, light and love to you in this time. I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my mother at a very young age, and I think only now do I have real persective on it.

[Maiasaura]

Hugs to you, Clay. Lioness sounds reasonable, but what do I know...couldn't hurt to try it though! Valerie, thinking of you today, too. Hope all's well with everyone. Hey-- I have a question for you crafty folk. I have this section of log that I've used for a Yule log in the past. It's about a foot long by about 5" diameter and has 4 holes cut in that accomodate taper candles. I originally, years ago, decorated it with fake holly and real (teeny) pine cones and such, with a glue gun. Well, they've all fallen off, and I no longer have a glue gun. I just came back from the dollar store with these decorations encased in wire and I thought I'd take them apart and Elmer's glue them on. They're things like fake holly leaves, pine cones, tiny cardinals, berries, things like that. Only...they refuse to glue on. I am thinking I probably need some sort of wire to hold them on. Is there such a thing as teeny nearly-invisible wire? That's relatively cheap? I'm thinking like thinner than fishing line, maybe, or about the same. Or should I see if I can borrow a glue gun from someone? Thoughts? If you can even picture this, LOL. Thanks, mamas!

[aweynsayl]

first of all, huge hugs to you, val, (and to aubergine) for dealing with loss near the holidays. as for reading something, maybe writing something is too intense/personal for right now.... is there a poem that you and she shared and loved? i read a poem at my grandpa's service many years ago. if i'd been asked to say anything that was my own thoughts, i wouldnt have done it, but reciting something memorized that was someone else's words was comfortable..... just a thought. huge hugs! i wish i was more "feeling" in this area, and better able to offer sympathy. are you taking FEs? i was thinking mariposa lily. hugs. xoxoxooxoxoxo

thank you, ladies,for the kudos for my self-pride. it's the flowers. really! and maybe a bit a new tapping script (the one on personal wisdom, if any of you are on his list-- i recommend it highly! PM me if you didnt get it and want it). but really. it's the flowers. i am feeling the most amazing shifting. bit by bit, layers being peeled away.... but i feel like a flower blooming... one where the bud was slightly misshapen, and you werent sure it would bloom, and then it opens, and the flower is HUGE! and how did it possibly fit inside? and, wow! it smells amazing, you just never would have guessed............................... 

bluets, you rock with recs, hon. we SO need to meet up sometime! i'll check out the NM conference, but NC in october is really calling "birthday present!" to me................. plus, like 4 of my favorite people ever live there (though one keeps trying to move......hugs, maia.)

btw-- what's "MRH"? i was leaning towards just buying a bottle, but of course, you know me, making it sounds too much fun!

i'm sorry you lost your rock! i have a RQ i've been wearing, and if i lost it, i think i'd cry for a day. :-( 

re: anxiety... have you tried any of the kalis/etc like we were talking about before? or ... um.... flowers?? ;-) mimulus or aspen? i LURVE mimulus. i actually think it's been one of the most *powerful* flowers i've worked with so far... though i love them all. ;-) (i do have my theories about why it's so powerful for me, though.... having a bit to do with it coming from wales, my fave place on earth.....................)

maia, hon. i wish i was there. :-( sending you hugs and happy thoughts.

family letters/cards/photos/etc.... we do a photo card, but rather than pose the boy, i take six of my fave pics from the year and make a card from them. i too have thought of doing a letter this year. i've always felt "eh, no one wants to hear our dull stuff" but this was such a wild year, i'd thought maybe.... of course, now i'm feeling something slightly different... i LOVE the idea of the multiple choice letter! how'd that work-- was each option true? or was only one true? (i too missed the thread card exchange. boo. :-(

indigo, yay! i'm so happy to hear you so happy! i'm so glad you are loving school. yay, you!!!!! xoxoox (though i do miss hearing from you more often!)

FR, i've only spent time in mexico, but i think any of those ideas sound splendid. i have a couple friends who know S/CA fairly well (one used to live there. one moved there recently)... let me know if you want me to ask them anything! i think it's a splendidly adventurous idea, though of course, selfishly i want you to stay so i can come visit you. ;-) 

cari, hugs on the leper van. :-(  (ok, i am laughing at that, though.) btw-- speaking of chocolatey nummyness-- saw yesterday that yoda chocolate has drinking chocolate now......... danger!

clay, oh, hon. i hear you on not wanting to go. is there an alternative doc you can go to, since it's going to be out of pocket anyway? they tend to be better with offering "deals" and they wont order stupidly expensive tests that maybe you feel arent going to give real answers anyway...?? i dunno too much how you "feel" about all that foofier stuff, but i will just say that as a kid, i had lots of odd ailments, and the only doc who ever really helped me was a foofy doc. if i send you a bottle of FEs will you take them, and just see? i'm just wondering if you dont feel under it all that YOU can heal yourself, and maybe something's keeping you from listening. like with the local/vs/GF/etc debate you were expressing a while back.... i dunno. i wish i was there and we could talk over coffee. i have skype if you want to chat about it. and i seriously will send you a bottle of something for yule if you just but hint. (or you could always bribe me with beads.) hugs on the dental costs. un-reimbursed medical expenses will be tax write offs, though, right? surely this still counts?... not that it helps a ton, but we had $7k with ds's birth, and got it back over two years in tax refunds. 

~~~~~

so i made my dried orange wreath yesterday, and i LURVE it! i realized (and you all will say "DUH") the little slices look just like little suns! so cute! i put it together without really thinking about meaning, and then saw i'd put on 11 slices (in a circle, around the wreath)... so of course, clay's voice popped in my head and said "hey! make that 12, silly!" how so totally wonderfully apt. :-)

which also got me thinking that while christmas ornaments are still out i am going to look for some dark gray/blue ones in the "drop" shape to use for SS "monsoon"/summer rain decorations.

BTW--- gasp! i did this all on MY computer! either the flicker is gone, or i dunno..... it seems to be better in the am (ds is still sleeping!) and in the bedroom. weird.

sending you all wonderful thoughts and happy vibes and sunshiney days (though it's overcast here today, of all the odd things......).

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxox