Bitter Sushi Ladies, December Edition - Page 2

[rcr]

Originally Posted by Laggie 

We saw the fertility doctor yesterday and it didn't go very well. He opened our file, said "I recommend you do IVF with ICSI, any questions?" and then blew off all our questions. DP was furious when we left, and he's not the type to get angry, ever.

I am feeling very discouraged.

Yea, I would switch too. Like others said. You (or your insurance) is paying a lot of money for them. The least they could do is consider all the options, or tell you what options are and are not, and why some won't work for you.

Originally Posted by Jane 

OT, but who has a baby stuff?  What do you have?  Do you let yourself buy with abandon, or reign yourself in?

Originally Posted by miriam_bat_avraham 

I'm a bit too ahead of myself, I think. Since, yanno, still not pregnant but someone could drop a newborn off at my house and barring a run to CVS for formula (shudder) I could care for them pretty well with no extra equipment for at least a few days...

I have all the baby stuff from DS, since I foolishly expected to have a baby when we started ttc after he was born. It is all in the loft, which is tiny and our only place for storage. It is literally packed with stuff. DH was up there putting photo albums away last weekend and trying to fin d xmas lights, and he was so mad about how full it is (like is is all my fault). I still hold out hope for having another baby, so I don't want to get rid of it all and just have to buy more stuff. But, it is taking up a lot of space in our little home (1200 square feet).

So, yea, like MBA, I could outfit a baby if one was dropped off my house... I could also feed them breastmilk, since I still have some stored in the freezer (we are using it in baths now), it is over a year old. And I may even be able to muster out some breast milk, since I just weaned DS 3 months ago. I wonder how long it takes to completely dry up after stopping. We were only nursing once or twice a day, so it is not like I could feel full breasts anyway. 

Originally Posted by Sweet.Bee 

May I rant for a moment, please?

It is CD-frickin'-26, and I still have not ovulated. Yep, 26. That's 2 days short of the "average" full cycle and still no egg! It's downright depressing. I had a + OPK 3 days ago and no temp jump yet. That can't be normal, right? My OPK pattern is usually 1 or 2 days of + with a temp shift 2 days after the last +. Is it even possible to O 3 days after a +? I thought I felt some ovary twinges (for like the 519th time this cycle) this morning, and my cervix is harder now.

I just don't know. I'm confused and frustrated and sad. And I think my body hates me.

Thanks for listening.

Hmm, that doesn't make sense to me. A + OPK means you are about to O, right? I don't really understand. Sorry. It sounds frustrating.

Originally Posted by BelovedK 

The only thing I have for a baby is a little hat that DH and I got in Amsterdam, It was from this funky little shop where the woman knitted these beautiful hats, blankets and toys. It symbolized our decision to TTC at the time and I still have it tucked away, hidden. I would never give it away, even if we never have a baby.

I had more Xrays yesterday morning. I had to go to the ER at 4 am after being up all night with breathing problems due to a nasty case of bronchitis. I had tons of Xrays after the car accident, and the other day I was at the dentist and they had to Xray my mouth. Can that hurt me?

Well, they gave me a pregnancy test, and it came back BFN, but I wouldn't get a BFP anyways at this oint. I just feel like I am abusing my body with so much radiation

I have read that too much radiation can hurt you, but also that they use so much less radiation nowadays, where as they used to use a huge amount just to accomplish the same thing. I am sure it is all critical, right... If  you can't avoid it, I really wouldn't worry to much about it.
 

Janger, Sorry about the BFN

I am 6 dpo. Nothing but boring. My last class is today. YAY (except for all the papers and tests to grade.. boo).

[lavatea]

Originally Posted by LessTraveledBy 

I do have things for a baby, but fewer and fewer. I have bought some cloth diapers just because I happened to see them and they were used and super cheap.

First I had kept almost everything from dd but later went through her stuff every year or two and got rid of things. She is now down to the things I plan to keep for her to show her. This includes only things like the outfit I had worn as a baby that she also wore and the hat she wore after baptism. Styles and tastes change and it is so easy to buy clothes cheaply if ever needed. I still have a wrap and sling and my Ergo, though. Partly, because they are expensive to buy new and because I can use them while babysitting, etc. I don't plan to get anything unless there is a real baby about to come. Little ones need very little anyway, other than diapers. Our dd never spit up, so I seriously could have got just 5 outfits and diapers for her and that is it. Instead, she had tons, due to two first time grandmas.

I was reading more about the ethics of int'l adoption last night and happened to see a documentary about it a couple of nights ago. (Moms looking for their kids whom they thought they had left, basically, in what we would call daycare. Instead, the kids had been sent to France or the US. The moms who didn't know how to read had signed "some papers.") Feels like I cannot just close my eyes and hope that our child really is an orphan or something... except for the Philippines, which is supposed to have an excellent program, if for some reason my husband came around. Many couples here would like to adopt from there and many lie in the application, and get others to lie for them. (Minister is supposed to write that the people who have been parish members on paper only, have been really active, practising members.) You are supposed to show proof that you have been a practicing Christian for 6 years. It really gets to me when people lie.... I mean it is supposed to be about the child, not about the grown-ups wanting a child. If the birth mom wants Christian parents (or muslim or pagan or whatever religion) it kills me to think she does not know her wishes are not being respected because of deliberate lies by the adoptive parents.   I was told a week ago that we could adopt from Morocco... if we were Muslim or willing to convert. Ummm.. No thank you. You are obviously not looking for me, and that is fine. I like it when the countries tell you exactly whom they want.

I'm really loving this adoption conversation. Very informative. I agree with you completely - lying is not acceptable. These mothers (the ones that really know they're giving their child up, anyway) have dreams and hopes for their children, including things like which religion they will be raised in. That's just sad that people aren't helping fulfill those.

Originally Posted by Sweet.Bee 

May I rant for a moment, please?

It is CD-frickin'-26, and I still have not ovulated. Yep, 26. That's 2 days short of the "average" full cycle and still no egg! It's downright depressing. I had a + OPK 3 days ago and no temp jump yet. That can't be normal, right? My OPK pattern is usually 1 or 2 days of + with a temp shift 2 days after the last +. Is it even possible to O 3 days after a +? I thought I felt some ovary twinges (for like the 519th time this cycle) this morning, and my cervix is harder now.

I just don't know. I'm confused and frustrated and sad. And I think my body hates me.

Thanks for listening.

You took soy, didn't you? I hope it didn't mess you up!! How much did you take?

Originally Posted by rcr 

So, yea, like MBA, I could outfit a baby if one was dropped off my house... I could also feed them breastmilk, since I still have some stored in the freezer (we are using it in baths now), it is over a year old. And I may even be able to muster out some breast milk, since I just weaned DS 3 months ago. I wonder how long it takes to completely dry up after stopping. We were only nursing once or twice a day, so it is not like I could feel full breasts anyway. 

Originally Posted by BelovedK 

The only thing I have for a baby is a little hat that DH and I got in Amsterdam, It was from this funky little shop where the woman knitted these beautiful hats, blankets and toys. It symbolized our decision to TTC at the time and I still have it tucked away, hidden. I would never give it away, even if we never have a baby.

I had more Xrays yesterday morning. I had to go to the ER at 4 am after being up all night with breathing problems due to a nasty case of bronchitis. I had tons of Xrays after the car accident, and the other day I was at the dentist and they had to Xray my mouth. Can that hurt me?

Well, they gave me a pregnancy test, and it came back BFN, but I wouldn't get a BFP anyways at this oint. I just feel like I am abusing my body with so much radiation

I have read that too much radiation can hurt you, but also that they use so much less radiation nowadays, where as they used to use a huge amount just to accomplish the same thing. I am sure it is all critical, right... If  you can't avoid it, I really wouldn't worry to much about it.
 

On the breastmilk thing - #1, great idea about using it in baths. I threw out my frozen bm that got old.

#2 - I stopped nursing over a year ago and two cycles ago I was still making at least a few drops of bm (I only know b/c I had the let-down feeling and checked). I haven't checked it lately b/c I haven't had any reason to notice.

About the radiation - I wouldn't stress it, either. I think you have to be exposed to a lot before it dose damage.

ETA - My temp jumped this morning to high 97s.  So depending on how the next few days play out, I think I O'ed yesterday (which would mean great timing). I figured that FF would move my O date based on today's much higher temp and the past few days' fertile signs, but it didn't. I wonder if it will in the next few days.

[rcr]

Originally Posted by lavatea 

On the breastmilk thing - #1, great idea about using it in baths. I threw out my frozen bm that got old.

#2 - I stopped nursing over a year ago and two cycles ago I was still making at least a few drops of bm (I only know b/c I had the let-down feeling and checked). I haven't checked it lately b/c I haven't had any reason to notice.

I

Wow, over a year! Is that common?

I had a planters wart and read somewhere that breastmilk can get rid of them, so I also put some on a wart. Did nothing.

[scarletjane]

Originally Posted by Jane 

ScarletJane - it wasn't ever lighthearted, exactly.  I mean, collecting clothing for a baby that isn't anywhere on the horizon, although desperately wanted is still sad.  Packing away the items intended for a baby that was expected within weeks is even sadder, but it's all why we are bitter.  I should have thought my subject through better in light of your situation. 

Wow, you're right. it isn't lighthearted for anyone, is it? and no, you shouldn't have thought about my situation. it's just the reality and i wasn't offended at all. just like it is for all of us... each of our stories might be a little different, but we're all just... here.  different path, same sadness.
 

Originally Posted by Sweet.Bee 

May I rant for a moment, please?

It is CD-frickin'-26, and I still have not ovulated. Yep, 26. That's 2 days short of the "average" full cycle and still no egg! It's downright depressing. I had a + OPK 3 days ago and no temp jump yet. That can't be normal, right? My OPK pattern is usually 1 or 2 days of + with a temp shift 2 days after the last +. Is it even possible to O 3 days after a +? I thought I felt some ovary twinges (for like the 519th time this cycle) this morning, and my cervix is harder now.

I just don't know. I'm confused and frustrated and sad. And I think my body hates me.

Thanks for listening.

what in the world is going on? oh, man, i would be SOO frustrated too. sweetbee, will you remind me.. are you still nursing your little one? And did you have regular cycles before his birth? And what days did you take soy, and how much?  Let's troubleshoot this together.
 

Collieflower, i've been thinking about you. I hope you're hanging in there ok.

On the me front, I'm CD 5 today. Started soy last night. I decided to give it another go.

[scarletjane]

sweetbee, i also wanted to add that your illness may have delayed ovulation. That can happen. It's the body's way of waiting until conditions are more optimal. Also, the pos. opk never means you're definitively going to ovulate. It can also happen when your body gears up to, but for some reason doesn't. You may already know that, but just in case, i thought it might be helpful.

xo

[Sweet.Bee]

Quote:

Originally Posted by rcr 

Hmm, that doesn't make sense to me. A + OPK means you are about to O, right? I don't really understand. Sorry. It sounds frustrating.

I thought ovulation happened no later than 48 hrs after the LH surge. Since it's been 3 days since my last + OPK, I'm worrying that I won't O. I usually ovulate late, but at least I ovulate. If I lose that, I will be distraught. I guess I was just hoping someone could tell me some magical story how they had a temp jump 3 days after a + OPK. Oh, and then got pregnant that cycle; that would be even better. I don't know, maybe I'm just being desperate and grasping at straws. Again.

 

Quote:

Originally Posted by lavatea 

You took soy, didn't you? I hope it didn't mess you up!! How much did you take?

Quote:

Originally Posted by scarletjane 

what in the world is going on? oh, man, i would be SOO frustrated too. sweetbee, will you remind me.. are you still nursing your little one? And did you have regular cycles before his birth? And what days did you take soy, and how much?  Let's troubleshoot this together.

Quote:

Originally Posted by scarletjane 

sweetbee, i also wanted to add that your illness may have delayed ovulation. That can happen. It's the body's way of waiting until conditions are more optimal. Also, the pos. opk never means you're definitively going to ovulate. It can also happen when your body gears up to, but for some reason doesn't. You may already know that, but just in case, i thought it might be helpful.

xo

I did 100mg (my pills are 100mg soy isoflavones each + some red clover). CD 4-8. I must admit that's the first thought that crossed my head, that soy had screwed me up. Maybe it's just a coincidence. My cycles are really screwed up already, so who knows.

It could be that I was sick (though on my last sick-around-O cycle I actually ovulated early!) I feel like my body wanted to O around CD18 at the peak of my illness. I had a huge amount of EWCM like I only get right before O; the rest of the time I just have a bit here and there. Then my cervix and CM were just a bit less fertile, I didn't O, and my body slowly revved up again. A had a lot of EWCM again around the + OPK. I've been having ovary soreness (not really O pain) today, so maybe I'm ovulating now? Tomorrow's temp will tell, I suppose. Or could I have a cyst? I don't know anything about cysts.

My cycles have been around 29-32 days since I had my 1st period at 12. I had one fluke 40-day cycle a few years ago (due to a lot of stress that month, I think), and 6 months without a period after losing weight too fast when I was around 21. Other than that, completely regular. Up until we started TTC #2 almost 8 months ago (I was on bc before we started trying). Nowadays, I see CD24 ovulation quite often. Never so late as CD26, though.

Not nursing anymore, sadly. Not for 1 year now. We had an amazing start when he was born and then sometime around 4.5 months, we found out he had lost 400g (that's almost 1lb, I think?) in 2 weeks. The doctor had us supplement with formula to get his weight back up. I tried pumping and feeding him more often (always before he got a bottle), but my supply had tanked for some unknown reason.  Then he only wanted the bottle because he couldn't get any milk out of poor dry mommy. I remember crying because he was biting me in desperation to get milk that wasn't there. Crying when he drank because I had huge open cuts around my nipples. But most of all crying because I couldn't even feed my baby, much as I wanted to. I felt like such a bad mother for that. Still makes me cry just to write about it.

But I have vowed that it will be different this time. I had enough milk in the beginning, so I think I can make enough. Something just happened, and I don't know what. Maybe it was having my wisdom teeth removed, which was around then. In any case, we bought a baby scale after that to track his weight. We will use it for #2 (if we can ever get pregnant), and at the first sign of anything, we will head things up before it's too late. Whether it's tea or herbs or bringing a lactation consultant here every single day, we will make it work the second time around. This resolution takes some of the edge off of my failure. And our son is really a super boy, so happy, friendly, amazing. He really cheers me up when I'm down.

Wow, that turned into kind of a tangent.

Originally Posted by rcr 

So, yea, like MBA, I could outfit a baby if one was dropped off my house... I could also feed them breastmilk, since I still have some stored in the freezer (we are using it in baths now), it is over a year old. And I may even be able to muster out some breast milk, since I just weaned DS 3 months ago. I wonder how long it takes to completely dry up after stopping. We were only nursing once or twice a day, so it is not like I could feel full breasts anyway. 

Originally Posted by lavatea 

On the breastmilk thing - #1, great idea about using it in baths. I threw out my frozen bm that got old.

#2 - I stopped nursing over a year ago and two cycles ago I was still making at least a few drops of bm (I only know b/c I had the let-down feeling and checked). I haven't checked it lately b/c I haven't had any reason to notice.

Wow, over a year! Is that common?

I had a planters wart and read somewhere that breastmilk can get rid of them, so I also put some on a wart. Did nothing.

Kind of related to my breastfeeding tangent, I would sometimes get some colostrum-like stuff coming out as late as this summer (so 3/4 of a year after stopping). Usually, when drying myself after a shower and my arm pressed too hard against there. And this even though I suffered from pitiful supply. Now that I think of it, maybe this means my supply would have been ok if not for whatever event (wisdom teeth removal?) that ruined it.

As a tangent of a tangent, I never felt "let down", even when I had lots of milk in the beginning. Even when engorged after he slept through the night w/o snacking. I wonder what that means.

And the breast milk as a cure for warts made me  . Thanks for that. I needed it with the sad thoughts of failed ovulation and failed breastfeeding on my mind.

[Silverbird]

 Hi Ladies, I'd like to join.  We are ttc #1 since June 2010 but it feels like longer as we had to delay ttc for two years due to dh illness.  Anyway looks like we might be here for a long while as the info from the doc says there is a 18 month waiting list for IVF that has to be a minmum of 12 months! Arrrg! It's espcially fustrating as over the border in England they try to keep the waiting list under 12 weeks.  and here they keep it over 12 months! So unfair! Altough I should count myself lucky as one English local health authoriy has said they will stop funding IVF altogether.  Any way don't know how I'll wait 18 months!

So I'm Silverbird ttc#1 with MFI and one ovary.

 lots of luck to all of us!

[lavatea]

Originally Posted by rcr 

Originally Posted by lavatea 

On the breastmilk thing - #1, great idea about using it in baths. I threw out my frozen bm that got old.

#2 - I stopped nursing over a year ago and two cycles ago I was still making at least a few drops of bm (I only know b/c I had the let-down feeling and checked). I haven't checked it lately b/c I haven't had any reason to notice.

I

Wow, over a year! Is that common?

I had a planters wart and read somewhere that breastmilk can get rid of them, so I also put some on a wart. Did nothing.

I have no idea. It freaked me out! I asked around here on the boards, but I never came to any conclusions. DS was my first experience with "extended" BFing. I weaned DD at 1 (and we had been doing a 1/2 and 1/2 arrangement before that anyway b/c I was working and having trouble pumping enough). I would have kept BFing DS even longer (he weaned  a few months after his 2nd bday) but it was really bugging me b/c I was pg. And he was easy to distract when he wanted to nurse so there was no big battle or anything. I hope I can nurse even longer next time! (If there is one.)

Originally Posted by scarletjane 

Originally Posted by Jane 

ScarletJane - it wasn't ever lighthearted, exactly.  I mean, collecting clothing for a baby that isn't anywhere on the horizon, although desperately wanted is still sad.  Packing away the items intended for a baby that was expected within weeks is even sadder, but it's all why we are bitter.  I should have thought my subject through better in light of your situation. 

Wow, you're right. it isn't lighthearted for anyone, is it? and no, you shouldn't have thought about my situation. it's just the reality and i wasn't offended at all. just like it is for all of us... each of our stories might be a little different, but we're all just... here.  different path, same sadness.

Why do we have to be here?? I'm glad I've found you guys, though. At least we're not all alone going through this crap.

Originally Posted by Sweet.Bee 

But I have vowed that it will be different this time. I had enough milk in the beginning, so I think I can make enough. Something just happened, and I don't know what. Maybe it was having my wisdom teeth removed, which was around then. In any case, we bought a baby scale after that to track his weight. We will use it for #2 (if we can ever get pregnant), and at the first sign of anything, we will head things up before it's too late. Whether it's tea or herbs or bringing a lactation consultant here every single day, we will make it work the second time around. This resolution takes some of the edge off of my failure. And our son is really a super boy, so happy, friendly, amazing. He really cheers me up when I'm down.

I know how hard it is not to think this way, but please try not to! You did the best you could given your circumstances and knowledge at the time. I feel this way a lot about my births (gave into the epi the first time; ended up with a c-section the second time) and to a lesser extent about BF with DD (see short background above), but I'm trying to let go of that negativity.

Originally Posted by Silverbird 

 Hi Ladies, I'd like to join.  We are ttc #1 since June 2010 but it feels like longer as we had to delay ttc for two years due to dh illness.  Anyway looks like we might be here for a long while as the info from the doc says there is a 18 month waiting list for IVF that has to be a minmum of 12 months! Arrrg! It's espcially fustrating as over the border in England they try to keep the waiting list under 12 weeks.  and here they keep it over 12 months! So unfair! Altough I should count myself lucky as one English local health authoriy has said they will stop funding IVF altogether.  Any way don't know how I'll wait 18 months!

So I'm Silverbird ttc#1 with MFI and one ovary.

 lots of luck to all of us!

Welcome!

[abstract]

Hello all, if you would be so kind, I'd like to join your group. DH (36) and I (33) have been TTC (his #2, my #1) off-and-on since November 2006.

For the bulk of 2007, we (so naively) operated under the assumption that the TTC process would be easy, consciously terming our no-stress approach "no-plan family planning." By 2008, nothing. It seemed maybe something was up on my end (I'd had 2 ruptured ovarian cysts), so I consulted with a Dr. and started charting my cycle. Everything appeared to be functioning ok on my end. Had a normal HSG, was ovulatory, etc. All OK. After several BFNs, my OB/GYN had me do 6 rounds of Clomid, assuring me that DH's swimmers must be fine, as evidenced, he said, by successful conception of DSD, who's now 12, and awesome BTW.

In 2009, following the Clomid experience, DH finally did his SA, and (SHOCK/AWE) the doctor identified major issue on HIS end and suggested changes to his patterns of smoking/diet/exercise. By 2010, totally wiped out, we took a hiatus so we could both focus on our careers and get minds/relationship/health back in order. He lost the smokes, I went vegan, and we both ate tons of green leafies, hit the gym, and quit drinking, all essential for me, having gained almost 30# on Clomid. DH went to RE and had SA done again. This time, everything was not only normal, it was stellar.

As of this month, we are back in the game. I'm using OPKs and charting again. My temp pattern seems promising, although I only started charting right before scheduled to O. If my calculations are correct, I am 8 DPO and counting. Trying desperately not to use HPT or read too much into my "symptoms."

I'm so happy to find a group of people who can relate. With so many friends/family members pregnant, TTC can be not only frustrating, but also more isolating than I ever imagined.

Best of luck to all of you! And cheers!

[Kyamo]

Welcome Silverbird and abstract!

[jenger]

CD1

[Laggie]

I'm sorry Jenger. May I recommend a nice glass of wine? (or a bottle )

Welcome, abstract! You're giving me hope that maybe DP can bring his numbers up, he just quit smoking but we're not sure what else he could do. The fertility doc just rolled his eyes at us when I asked that question and said "We just work with what we have."

Silverbird, 18 months sucks but I would be pretty happy if IVF was paid for! They quoted us $10,000 per cycle.

As for baby stuff, I have a few things that my brother gave me last year when I thought I'd be pregnant within 6 months I'm planning to lend them out to a friend pretty soon. I have resisted buying anything, although I tend to go a little bit overboard shopping for my friends' kids.

[lavatea]

Originally Posted by jenger 

CD1

Sorry. :(

[Kinza]

Hi, everyone.  I'm going to do a few personals, but in a rush so I'm thinking of everyone, and sorry to those I miss!

Sweet.Bee--I can't remember, have you ever done Clomid?  I know you took soy this go-round, but I noticed after my second Clomid cycle that my ovulation date moved up.  First Clomid cycle I O'd on day 22, I think, and the second I O'd on day 15.  Since that second round, a few months ago, I have O'd on CD 15 3 or 4 times, and CD 17, 19, and 20.  But before that, I never O'd as early as CD 15, and it was usually between CD 18 and 26.  So, while it didn't help me get pregnant, it did seem to kick-start earlier ovulation for me.  So in the last twelve months, instead of having 6 or 8 cycles like last year, I have had 9 or 10.  Just food for thought for you, if you would be interested in Clomid.  Or encouragement to give the soy some more time!  Good luck.

Silverbird and abstract--Hi!  Welcome to the group.

jenger--Sorry about CD1.

Regarding baby stuff--we don't have any.  I keep wanting to buy a tiny pair of shoes and cute cloth diapers for inspiration, but I know it would just kill me to have them in the house and no reason to hope for a baby. 

Selfish moment--I did get some good news today.  My RE appointment was moved up to Monday, which is exciting.  I can finally feel like I'm doing something.  And also, I start a new job on Wednesday, which is super-great because I've been unemployed since the business I worked at closed over a year ago.  So yippee. 

Jane, do you happen to know if fasting blood glucose levels of 98-114 indicate enough insulin resistance to interfere with TTC?  I know you may not know, but you are quite knowledgeable, so I thought I'd ask.

[miriam_bat_avraham]

Originally Posted by jenger 

CD1

Oh no :( I'm sorry, hun. Not again...

Originally Posted by Kinza 

Hi, everyone.  I'm going to do a few personals, but in a rush so I'm thinking of everyone, and sorry to those I miss!

Sweet.Bee--I can't remember, have you ever done Clomid?  I know you took soy this go-round, but I noticed after my second Clomid cycle that my ovulation date moved up.  First Clomid cycle I O'd on day 22, I think, and the second I O'd on day 15.  Since that second round, a few months ago, I have O'd on CD 15 3 or 4 times, and CD 17, 19, and 20.  But before that, I never O'd as early as CD 15, and it was usually between CD 18 and 26.  So, while it didn't help me get pregnant, it did seem to kick-start earlier ovulation for me.  So in the last twelve months, instead of having 6 or 8 cycles like last year, I have had 9 or 10.  Just food for thought for you, if you would be interested in Clomid.  Or encouragement to give the soy some more time!  Good luck.

Silverbird and abstract--Hi!  Welcome to the group.

jenger--Sorry about CD1.

Regarding baby stuff--we don't have any.  I keep wanting to buy a tiny pair of shoes and cute cloth diapers for inspiration, but I know it would just kill me to have them in the house and no reason to hope for a baby. 

Selfish moment--I did get some good news today.  My RE appointment was moved up to Monday, which is exciting.  I can finally feel like I'm doing something.  And also, I start a new job on Wednesday, which is super-great because I've been unemployed since the business I worked at closed over a year ago.  So yippee. 

Jane, do you happen to know if fasting blood glucose levels of 98-114 indicate enough insulin resistance to interfere with TTC?  I know you may not know, but you are quite knowledgeable, so I thought I'd ask.

Good luck with your appointment! It's the day after mine :)

[Jane]

98-114 are not good fasting numbers, if they are real.  Are they real, within the first hour-ish of the morning, fasting numbers?

[LessTraveledBy]

Wishing you a good weekend, everyone!

I bumped into an old neighbor yesterday. She had lots of trouble TTC their first and had him through.. not sure what... IVF?. Anyway... I believe their second child was a surprise and she is now pregnant with their third. I am so happy for her. She is a great lady and planning a home birth, which is super rare here.

It seems that there are no open doors for us at this point. Frankly, adoption is not going to happen, due to money. The more I learn, the clearer that is. So... we will keep TTC but I want to be done looking for this and that supplement, you know how it goes. I am not taking soy this cycle, though will take progesterone just to feel better, physically, in the TWW. I should lose weight... I gained 25 lbs right after dd turned one and my hypo symptoms really kicked in. This weight is not going to come off without a major exercise routine, if even then. I don't have much motivation, although I do wonder if my infertility might be linked to my weight. 

[Sweet.Bee]

Sorry, jenger. 

Silverbird and abstract, welcome and good luck.

Laggie, will you be doing IVF soon? Wow, 10,000. I'm not sure I want to know what any fertility treatments cost here, but I suspect a lot. And somehow I doubt our overpriced insurance covers it.

Kinza, I asked my doctor for Clomid 2 months ago. He wouldn't prescribe it because though I ovulate late, I still do ovulate. And we haven't been trying one year yet (8 months), so he just told us to come back then. Even if this cycle turns anovulatory, based on our other discussions I really have no faith that he will do anything whatsoever. It's frustrating. Good luck at your appointment and congratulations on the job!

LessTraveledBy, I always feel better when I'm exercising regularly. It's a great mood booster. I have to be careful not to overdo it, though, or I will stop ovulating altogether. Fertility yoga (or any old yoga or pilates, really) is nice and relaxing. Not high impact at all. I definitely recommend it if you're looking for some sort of exercise.

As for me, CD28 and still no O.  The EWCM has returned in globs, though. This is the 3rd time I think my body has geared up to O this cycle, so maybe the third time's a charm? Will my body finally push out an egg? My right ovary hurts, though with a month-long wait to O, when doesn't it hurt? Taking an OPK in a bit and hoping.

[abstract]

jenger - I'm so sorry too. :(

Laggie - I have hope for your DH, too. And don't let fertility doc get you down. It's stunning, really, how dismissive medical practitioners can be to earnest (and very reasonable) questions like that. Cynicism must be an occupational hazard. Anyway, I really was amazed, b/c I didn't expect major changes to my DH's SA, esp. since on top of lifestyle issues, he was also beginning to develop varicoceles. It's not scientific, I know, but I think on top of smoking, eating differently/exercising/taking a regular men's multivitamin may have helped him, too. His energy levels increased, and he came to have much healthier of a glow--I hadn't realized quite how ashen his skin had been before. :P Another variable that I have wondered about is the doctor himself. SA #1 was conducted by a urologist. SA #2 by new RE.

Kinza - Congrats on the new job!

LessTraveledBy - I feel you on the weight issue. Having ballooned after Clomid, with no help from genetics/age/emotional eating, I felt like I was sabotaging my efforts by not being fitter. I will say, in favor of the exercise routine, that exercise  really helped me to manage the TTC blues (or mean reds, as Holly Golightly in Breakfast at Tiffany's would say). Much better than fuming at home, which is what I was doing. Plus, it made me feel more inclined to BD. :)

Sorry if I missed this, but has anyone here ever tried acupuncture? I was surprised when my new doctor recommended it and still don't know too much about how that works...

Also, for those of you who may have hypothyroidism, what was the first clue? And do you have any advice on how to get a sound diagnosis? That's another avenue we didn't explore before--because doctors always told me my hormone levels were OK. But I've been noticing this time around that my temps, while the pattern looks good, are pretty low overall. And couple of articles I've found seem to indicate that the regular thyroid tests can miss hypo sometimes...

[Kinza]

m_b_a--Good luck at your appointment, too!

Jane--I was afraid they were bad.  They are within a few minutes of getting up, with a monitor that is correct.  DH checked the monitor I am using against his monitor, and mine actually read three points lower than his, so my numbers may even be those three points higher.  Thanks for your input.

LTB--I'm sorry things seem so hopeless right now.

Sweet.Bee--Doctors can be so different.  My former gyn prescribed six rounds for me, even though I ovulate on my own, too.  I only took 2 rounds--I didn't want to take so many rounds of it that I couldn't take more with an RE. 

abstract--Thanks!