Originally Posted by fairejour
No matter if each of these incidents would be "normal" in another situation, I read your other thread and I think it is VERY clear that your son has very serious impulse control issues. He is either unable, or unwilling to control his actions. That needs dealt with.
I don't know exactly what everyone thinks I should do. My son's team of professionals now includes:
1 child psychologist
1 child psychiatrist
1 counselor specializing in EMDR (a trauma therapy)
1 behavioral pediatrician
1 occupational therapist
I am not sure what else people think I should be doing, and it's disappointing that this always seems to take the "your kid is having problems; attack the mother" tone. I didn't think that was the point of MDC. I thought this was supposed to be a supportive environment. I think saying "This doesn't seem like what my kids are doing" or "I don't think this is normal behavior because of a, b, c" is one thing, but to insinuate that I am not doing anything to help my son or to try to deal with his problems is ridiculous, unfair, and unkind.
I have continued to consult people because my son has continued to have problems, and I am treating this in a multitude of ways. Just because he continues to have behavior problems doesn't mean I am not doing anything about it! You are very lucky if you have a child that responds immediately to "You must not do that," or to time outs, or to grounding, or whatever methods you use. My son hasn't responded to any of these methods, and they have all been tried MANY times.
Dealing with what I have been dealing with with my son for the past couple of years has been DEVASTATING. I am doing this alone, working nearly two full time jobs and being a full time parent. It requires super human energy, patience, and strength. I haven't had a single date (or hugs or kisses or sex!) in SIX YEARS because every moment is devoted to my son and to work, but mainly to trying to help my son and find solutions for him, yet people who don't even know me (not all of you, but some) continue to insinuate that I am not doing enough, or not doing the right thing, or that somehow I am just doing things all wrong.
Seriously, please think about what you are saying before posting. Just because my son is having problems doesn't mean I am not handling it correctly. I am spending hundreds of dollars a month on just co-payments for therapies for him, always looking for something new. SERIOUSLY, what else am I supposed to do? I think I am doing all that I can and the best that I can, and having to come here and face criticism when I am looking for support is not helpful. This is my child and my life. It's not a debate about the latest political topic or something else that's not personal. I am a real person with real feelings. I know it can be hard to forget that at times online, but there is still a real person connected to the other end of this.