Queer & Pregnant: December & January - Page 3

[indigoscot]

re: ccb and sibling vials.  we already went down that route when i was pg with ds1.  they had no vials left!  we lucked into 6 more vials due to another client reactivating our donor and used those for dp to get pg with ds2.  i have to say that if a bank has clients on the call list for any donor vials becoming available, wouldn't it be a good idea to contact them if another client decides to reactivate that donor?  apparently they don't even consider that.  anyways, another option (if you are using an re to get pregnant) is to store vials there.  in our case it turned out to be more cost effective to store our vials at our re's office than store them at ccb.  so all our remaining vials are there and we pay a yearly storage fee that is a LOT less.

one more thing to consider.  when we started planning for dp to get pg, we contacted ccb about getting the vials shipped and then they told us that i would need to transfer them from me to her which would take paperwork (which could take several months to process) and a fee.  i was mad.  they don't consider you a couple.  so here's what we did to get around it.  i had our new re send in the form to ccb.  i shipped the vials we had left in my name to our re's office then signed over the vials to dp using a notarized form.  then dp opened her own account for the vials of the alternative donor we bought. 

g

[LibraryLady]

Beastie~ You seem to be the most knowledgeable about the allergy/cold stuff, so I shall bow to your expertise!  And I hope I didn't step on toes talking about our plan for a non-genetic family! I think it's wonderful the lengths you're going to to make even more of a connection. I just think that we're not going to worry about long-term storage, etc. Especially since there's a good chance we'll be living in the UK by the time  it's DPs turn.    

Amy~ Thanks for your sympathetic tears xoxox   Hormones or not, it's nice to be thought of. Everything's much better now (though I'm realizing just at this moment I forgot my pill this morning~ crap!!) I'm almost well and breathing through both nostrils and all the way into my lungs for the first time in  maybe three months. Makes sleeping better, I can tell you that for sure!

Coco~ Happy belated! Sorry I missed it and hope it was great!!!

Played Beatles into my belly last night (in honor of John Lennon )   She boogied like crazy to the early stuff (my favorite too) then went righ to sleep when 'Yesterday' came on. Such a dancin' gal! 

[Beastie]

Library: Oh, I'm not offended at all, and I hope my current obsession over vial-hoarding doesn't come across as judgment against your perfectly smart and reasonable plan!  I'm thrilled about all the many genetic and non-genetic ways we get to build our families!  I'm glad your breathing continues to improve, right in time for this glorious and fun middle part of pregnancy.

Indigo: Thanks for the extra info about CCB. I'll tell DP about your experience, and see if that helps at all in the plan to buy now. Though I think, given our loss last pregnancy and our caution this time around, that the compromise might be holding out for a few more months (unless the donor supply goes lower than 25), and then buying in bulk (although bulk sperm is an especially gross image) after this baby is earthside.

Amy: Sorry you're so tired and gross feeling. After trying so hard to be pregnant, and wanting it so much, I couldn't believe how ill-prepared I was for months of feeling and looking crappy. It felt like I'd never get to the glorious waddling and glowing part of things!  So I'm sending you empathy and a promise that it'll improve, eventually! As for the vials, we feel the same pull between dealing with nearer financial obligations (like savings for this summer) and big picture stuff (like sperm hoarding)!  It's hard to figure out what to do!

Coco: Happy birthday!

[cejae]

 So, it's good to throw up in front of colleagues, right? 

I'm clearly on the fast track to tenure...

[wehrli]

Originally Posted by cejae 

 So, it's good to throw up in front of colleagues, right? 

I'm clearly on the fast track to tenure...

awww... CJ... i'm sure they'll understand. sorry you are feeling so sick.

[AmandaHope]

Originally Posted by wehrli 

Originally Posted by cejae 

 So, it's good to throw up in front of colleagues, right? 

I'm clearly on the fast track to tenure...

awww... CJ... i'm sure they'll understand. sorry you are feeling so sick.

  Ditto.  You have a great department, right?  I'm just sorry you're still feeling so bad.  Hang in there!
 

[LibraryLady]

Cejae~ In your situation, it's perfectly acceptable. If they give you any guff, throw up ON them next time!

[cejae]

Thanks, guys.  I really appreciate it!  I do have the world's greatest department, actually.  The faculty member who was graced with the presence of my  bodily fluids today had actually recently read an interview in which I raphsodized about the glories of Reese's Peanut Butter cups (and that I would take them with me to a desert island as my one food).  So he brought me some as a present.  Very sweet.  So yes, great understanding colleagues.  Just a lot of embarrassment.  Sigh.

[gumshoegirl007]

The Q&P thread is almost as active as the Queer Conceptions thread.  Whew!!!

Cejae - Moderately embarrassing, yes.  But a great story to tell in the future, absolutely!!! And, you got peanut butter cups out of it.  Even better.

LibraryLady - Baby dancing!  Isn't it great?

AmyPDX - I'm so sorry to hear about the exhaustion.  I just kept on counting down the days till the second trimester.  That's what got me through!

Lisedea - Welcome!

AFU, nothing new to report at all.  We're just taking it day by day and working through the hecticness of the holiday season (which, because we're not doing Christmas here, is only hectic because of all these other life things going on).  I can't imagine what it would be like if we had holiday celebrations and prep to undertake as well.  Today is a somewhat celebratory day as we've hit the 24w viability mark.  Not that I want to have the experience of a really premature baby, but it's kind of interesting to think that as of today we'd have to consider measures to save her little life.  In my head, today she's become a real live human being.

[LibraryLady]

Gumshoe~ Awwww! I teared up over your 'real live human being'.  Aspidistra feels a lot more real now that I feel her wiggling around.  She woke up this morning just after I did, and I could really tell that's what was happening. It's amazing.

Cejae~ That's a wonderful colleague you have.  I think everyone will be most excited and understanding of 'your condition'. (DP loves saying that to me now, 'Be careful! Someone in your condition shouldn't be doing that!') 

And yes, we're getting as busy as the QC board! I think the slowness before was due to a lot of people being at the end of term and giving birth, and we're just the next cycle. Yay!!!

Another day of being able to breathe and not cough! It's so lovely!!!!

[pigirl]

Welcome new pregnant folks!  And Cejae, so sorry you threw up at work.  That's a big fear of mine, too.  The peanut butter cup response was very sweet. 

Library, glad you're feeling better.  And happy birthday, Coco.

I'm still a nauseated, exhausted mess so please excuse my missing a lot of personals.  I'm reading along, and cheering you all on.

But some good news:  we had our u/s yesterday, and saw a heartbeat!  It was 159, and the baby measured 8 weeks 0 days, which was exactly right.  So everything looks great, and I told my boss at work yesterday.  I kind of had to, I'm showing so much, what with everything getting bent out of place with my first pregnancy.  (I had that stomach muscle separation thing.)  It's a relief to not have to hide feeling so gross now, too.

I think there was a QOTD about siblings.  This is our second pregnancy, and presuming all goes well, it will be our last.  We did worry about being able to use the same donor for this pregnancy as we did before, but because the bank had already released the donor's ID to us (Rainbow Flag HS does that at 3 months), we had a back-up plan.  Which is good, because a) the bank has since stopped doing most of its banking business, and b) the frozen stuff didn't work and we had to go the fresh route anyway.  The bank actually told us they were not going to be banking anymore in a really offhand, infuriating way, before we were ready to conceive a sibling, and I did panic for a bit trying to find a way to buy vials ahead of time and store them.  But it ended up they were still able (usually) to ship the remaining stock to us as we needed it, and we didn't have to store things elsewhere.  But' I'm really not going to miss the stress of TTC with them!

[lisedea]

Thank you all for your help with the meds question...I ended up finding out my allergy medicine is in category B (wishy washy) so it isn't an absolute no but not a certain okay either. I have decided not to take them until I talk to my OB (finally have an appointment set for the 3rd!!) and continue on with my daily nasal rinses...at this very moment my right eye is bright red, my throat itches, and I keep sneezing. Awesome.

[Coco99]

A bit of news from us !

We went to the OB wednesday and everything looks good. Baby A (Charlie) is already very VERY low however, so low that he decided to do a cervix check... but although her cervix is shortened, it is still closed si that is good. DP will reach 31 weeks monday so things are getting safer and safer IF the babies were to be born so we dont worry too much. He was a bit concerned about the weight difference between the two babies (2 pounds 7 and 3 pounds 2 at 28W2D) so we go to another big US in 2 weeks. He said not to worry too much tho because although they are at the 30th percentiles and 75th percentiles, he reminded us that the weights were distributed in a bell curve and that there isnt that much difference between 30 and 75 percentiles because they were both stil within one standard deviation.... And you know what, I actually understood ! NOW I understand what math class was for !! lol.

We now start going to the hospital every 2 weeks. DP is doing good but she is getting the DONE feeling. This pregnancy has been very hard on her and she is very restricted in her movements. She told me that she was NEVER going to be pregnant again so it would have to me me next time (as we had already determined anyway lol). Now that is ONE advantage Queer families like ours enjoy !

Coco

xxx

[gumshoegirl007]

Coco99 - This is fantastic news!!!  The twins will be here soon enough, but hopefully not too soon.  I feel for your DP and the challenges that pregnancy puts on our bodies.  Hang in, you're almost there.

Pigirl - Congrats on a solid u/s.  And, given that you're feeling so awful, it sounds like the baby is thriving!!!

All I have to say is TGIF.

[LibraryLady]

Coco~ That's really excellent news.  It must be a sigh of relief to get to the thriving stage, where if something happened and the babes arrived, they'd still be okay.  Yay for you and your math skills too!! Very impressive!  I'm sure your DP is about done!! But yes, we gals can take turns, which is another reason we're awesome.

Gumshoe~ AMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Busy Friday for me~ I'm very happy because just as I sat to write this, Aspidistra kicked me, and I hadn't felt her this morning. I was starting to get worried, but I guess she was just sleeping in. Lucky girl!!!

[Pearl1]

Edited by Pearl1 - 2/7/11 at 4:00pm

[painefaria]

Ceajae - I hear you about the puking at work...  I have been lucky enough to be able to put off the puking until I get home or everyone leaves the office   One day I drove home (1 mile away) just so that I could throw up in my own bathroom!

Yay Gumshoe!  I hear you about viability.  When I was pregnant with DS that was an important week in my head.  I think that I was more excited about 24 weeks than I was entering the 3rd tri.

Pigirl - Yay heartbeat!  I almost cried when I heard that beautiful sound for the first time!

Library - I am glad that your breathing is so much better and baby is moving regularly.

AFU - things are going well we are plugging along day by day.  I am still really nauseated and have to take medications so I can work.  I am hoping that I won't need them shortly

[cejae]

Painefaria, I so feel your pain!! I'm a couple weeks behind you - and I'm sorry you are in the second trimester and still on meds!  What are you taking?  I get a med free day now and then and I treasure them.  I know they are safe, but I still freak out about the whole thalidomide thing.  Totally irrational.

abeecharmer, I'm so glad you guys have hit 32 weeks!  Bedrest since week 26 and with a toddler?  Wow.  Wow.  You are a goddess (or that's what I've been telling my partner as she's been practically a single parent while I lay on the couch and moan!). 

Coco, It's funny how the 1SD measure feels so much better than the raw percentiles!  Remember, it's all relative and just because it's not average, doesn't mean it's bad.  Hang in there babies!

Pigirl, yay for the heartbeat!! 

AFM, So glad to be done with this week of teaching.  I just keep chanting 8 more days, 8 more days.  Whew.  

I took my class on a field trip to Focus on the Family on Tuesday.  Felt totally transgressive as I walked around with my babies in my tummy. :).  They know I'm queer (because I take my classes there a lot) and when they found out I was pregnant with twins they were beyond excited.  Seriously.  The ex-gay who presents to my class and I ended up having a 20 minute long conversation about parenting twins (he has twins).  Focus fascinates me.  I think they're convinced that they'll some day win me over to their side.   

On Monday I take my class to a series of prisons.  My goal is to not throw up on the busride down or while in the prisons themselves.  There are lots of smells when people live in close enclosed quarters.  Sigh.  Wish me luck.

[painefaria]

Cejae - I am on Zofran, Zantac, and promethezine.  I have quantity limits on the Zofran so I generally take them during the week and the promethizine on the weekends.  I was having a lot of issues of throwing up bile and stomach pain so the Family Dr started me on the Zantac.  I am not sure if the zantac is working but I can at least keep down food and water at this time and my stomach does not feel like someone is sticking hot pokers in it.  DP and I are jealous, we would love to live in CO again.  We lived in Denver/Aurora/Golden from 2001 - 2003.  We miss it so much!

[LibraryLady]

Cejae~ You're made of sterner stuff than I. I can't keep myself under control around 'people like that'.  I get too emotional and then I just get into arguments and end up crying. I'm sure the 'ex-gay' fellow IS trying to win you over. I mean, it worked for him!  I'm sure he never even thinks impure thoughts or anything!!  But bravo to you for educating others.  The prison trip sounds more my style. There's a nationwide shortage of prison librarians and I'd actually like to look into that field. They do a lot of good work, literacy classes, etc.  I'd love to work in a women's prison.

Little Aspidistra's started punching me as well as kicking me. She's still right-side-up (aka WRONG side up, flip over, girlfriend!!) but I guess there's time for that.  22 weeks today!